A guide for guardians of middle school girls Self-Esteem A guide for guardians of middle school girls

Today’s Goals Talk about factors that affect overall self-esteem Provide strategies that can help you boost your student’s self-esteem Help the girls of CMS choose healthy behaviors, feel good about themselves, and separate self- worth from physical appearance

Self-Esteem Impacted by factors such as age, race, ethnicity, puberty, body weight, involvement in physical activity, and gender Girls report lower total self-concept than boys Declines in adolescence Girls’ self-esteem does not increase until adulthood (Myers, Willse, & Villalba, 2011) Across all racial groups (Choate, 2007)

Why is important for girls to have high self-esteem? Low self-esteem can lead to emotional distress, obsessive thinking about appearance, unnecessary cosmetic surgery, depression, smoking, and maladaptive eating practices, (Choate, 2007) & poor health (Myers, Willse, & Villalba, 2011) Positive self-esteem has been linked with mental health, feelings of mattering to others, positive body-image & physical health (Myers, Willse, & Villalba, 2011)

Middle School: A Critical Period In adolescence, body image becomes the most important factor in determining self-esteem Puberty brings average weight gain of 50 pounds in girls When a girl’s physical appearance becomes most important to her, her body is undergoing changes that stray from her ideal 40%-70% of teen girls are dissatisfied with two or more aspects of their bodies 42% to 45% of 9th to 12th grade girls were dieting to lose weight in a large-scale study Adolescent girls especially form self-identity based on social comparison and media images Interest in dating makes girls more aware of their appearances as part of their identities (Choate, 2007)

What Factors Negatively Impact Self-Esteem? Gender role messages that encourage girls to conform Contradictory cultural expectations that tell girls that they should strive to be “superwomen” lead to feelings of inadequacy Media messages that tell girls that they can become perfect if they work hard enough lead to self-blame (Choate, 2007) Peer group discussions that center around appearances and boys Lack of social support (Dalgas-Pelish, 2006) Perceived body image, not BMI Teasing (Kutob, Senf, Crago, & Shisslak, 2010)

What can guardians do to help their students with self-esteem?

Building Upon Strengths:

Coping Self Leisure Stress management Self worth Realistic beliefs

Leisure Girls who are involved in physical activity generally have higher levels of self-esteem make sure girls are involved for the right reasons! Girls who are involved in team sports generally have higher levels of self-esteem TIPS: Help her find leisure and extracurricular activities that are fun and are in line with her values (Choate, 2007)

Self Worth and Realistic Beliefs TIPS: Help her understand the harmful messages being sent by the media. You could create a scrapbook that compares realistic/healthy images to unrealistic ones Encourage girls to be independent thinkers. Sit down with your student and talk about cultural values and encourage her to make decisions for herself Talk about the importance of developing a personal value system Develop a “gratitude journal” that focuses on what is going well in her life and about her strengths (Choate, 2007)

Social Self Girls need family members who provide them with affirming message about their bodies Female Guardians – girls get messages about their own body image from you! TIPS: Discourage diet talk in the home, engage in healthy habits, refrain from negative self-talk Talk about different body types and expose girls to female role models of all shapes and sizes (Choate, 2007)

Social Self TIPS: Friends – Can hurt or help Encourage your students to get involved in peer groups that help them to feel good about themselves (Choate, 2007)

A Final Note Teasing is one of the biggest predictors of self- esteem Talk to your student about telling an adult If your student reports teasing to you, contact the school Educate your student on the harmful effects of teasing others (Kutob et al., 2010)

Helping Organizations Girl Scouts of America www.girlscouts.org Piedmont YMCA www.piedmontymca.org Youth Sports Now www.youthsportsnow.org Confidence Coalition www.confidencecoalition.org Girl Talk www.mygirltalk.org Girls on the Run www.girlsontherun.org Girlshealth.gov

Resources Think Confident, Be Confident for Teens by Marci Fox & Leslie Sokol Brave New Girls by Jeanette Gadeberg The Self-Esteem Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Build Confidence and Achieve Your Goals by Lisa M. Schab Be True to Yourself: A Daily Guide for Teenage Girls by Amanda Ford and Shannon Berning

References Choate, L. (2007). Counseling adolescent girls for body image resilience: Strategies for school counselors. Professional School Counseling, 10(3), 317-326. Dalgas-Pelish, P. (2006). Effects of a self-esteem intervention program on school-age children. Pediatric Nursing, 32(4), 341-348. Kutob, R. M., Senf, J. H., Crago, M., & Shisslak, C. M. (2010). Concurrent and longitudinal predictors of self-esteem in elementary and middle school girls. Journal Of School Health, 80(5), 240-248. doi:10.1111/j.1746-1561.2010.00496.x Myers, J. E., Willise, J. T., & Villalba, J. A. (2011). Promoting self- esteem in adolescents: The influence of wellness factors. Journal Of Counseling & Development, 89(1), 28-36.