Fall 2015Pelkey BULLYING “…what are you going to do?”

RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU HAVE EVER BULLIED SOMEONE.

1 out of 4 kids is bullied or abused by another youth. 1 out of 5 admits to being a bully.

Bullying RBullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children (and adults) that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time.

Types of Bullying RThere are three types of bullying: RVerbal bullying is saying or writing mean things. Verbal bullying includes: RTeasing RName-calling RInappropriate sexual comments RTaunting RThreatening to cause harm RSocial bullying, sometimes referred to as relational bullying, involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. Social bullying includes: RLeaving someone out on purpose RTelling other children not to be friends with someone RSpreading rumors about someone REmbarrassing someone in public RPhysical bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. Physical bullying includes: RHitting/kicking/pinching RSpitting RTripping/pushing RTaking or breaking someone’s things RMaking mean or rude hand gestures RThere are three types of bullying: RVerbal bullying is saying or writing mean things. Verbal bullying includes: RTeasing RName-calling RInappropriate sexual comments RTaunting RThreatening to cause harm RSocial bullying, sometimes referred to as relational bullying, involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. Social bullying includes: RLeaving someone out on purpose RTelling other children not to be friends with someone RSpreading rumors about someone REmbarrassing someone in public RPhysical bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. Physical bullying includes: RHitting/kicking/pinching RSpitting RTripping/pushing RTaking or breaking someone’s things RMaking mean or rude hand gestures

Cyber Bullying R Cyber Bullying - any type of bullying that is carried out by electronic medium. There are 7 types including: R1. Text message bullying R2. Picture/video clip bullying via mobile phone cameras R3. Phone call bullying via mobile phones R4. bullying R5. Chat-room bullying R6. Bullying through instant messaging (IM) R7. Bullying via websites R Cyber Bullying - any type of bullying that is carried out by electronic medium. There are 7 types including: R1. Text message bullying R2. Picture/video clip bullying via mobile phone cameras R3. Phone call bullying via mobile phones R4. bullying R5. Chat-room bullying R6. Bullying through instant messaging (IM) R7. Bullying via websites

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO HURTS SOMEONE ELSE BY INTENTIONALLY PUSHING OR HITTING. I’ll show you!

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO THREATENS YOU WITH A FIST IN YOUR FACE. You better give me your cell phone or else…

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO TEASES WITH MEAN WORDS. No one likes you. Why don’t you just go away?

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS ALSO SOMEONE WHO JOINS IN THE LAUGHING WHEN SOMEONE ELSE TEASES. Look at that kid! He is such a dork!

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS ALSO SOMEONE WHO MAKES A POINT NOT TO LET YOU SIT WITH THEM AT LUNCH. You can’t sit at our table.

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS ALSO SOMEONE WHO EXCLUDES OTHERS FROM THEIR GROUP OR ACTIVITY. You can’t play with us.

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS ALSO SOMEONE WHO HURTS YOUR FEELINGS ON PURPOSE BY ROLLING THEIR EYES AT YOU. Ughhh…

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO USES THEIR POPULARITY TO BOSS OTHERS AROUND, TELLING OTHERS WHAT THEY SHOULD OR SHOULDN’T DO. Now remember, Sheila’s out- No one needs to talk to her or include her.

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO TRIES TO CONTROL THEIR FRIEND AND NOT LET THEM SPEND TIME WITH OTHERS.

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO SPREADS BAD RUMORS ABOUT OTHERS. She makes me so mad. Who does she think she is? Do you know that she used to date that nerd named Bert?

A PERSON USING BULLYING BEHAVIORS… RIS SOMEONE WHO GOSSIPS OR REPEATS BAD RUMORS ABOUT OTHERS. Do you know what I heard about…

RAISE YOUR HAND NOW IF YOU THINK YOU HAVE USED BULLY BEHAVIOR.

LETS LOOK AT THE BEHAVIORS WE NEED TO ADD TO OUR BULLY BEHAVIOR LIST It’s not OK to: Push, hit, hurt others physically, threaten, intimidate… It’s not OK to: Push, hit, hurt others physically, threaten, intimidate…

AND IT’S ALSO NOT OK TO: Tease in a hurtful way Join in laughing when someone else is making fun of someone Exclude others from the group or activities Roll our eyes intending to hurt Boss our friends, telling them what they can and can’t do Control and manipulate others Spread rumors about others

DID THE PICTURES WE LOOKED AT A MOMENT AGO STIR UP ANY THOUGHTS OF?  Oh…I’ve acted like that before…  Yeah…that’s happened to me before.  I saw that happening to someone else.  Oh…I’ve acted like that before…  Yeah…that’s happened to me before.  I saw that happening to someone else.

3 ROLES IN A BULLYING SITUATION RTHE AGGRESSOR RTHE TARGET OR VICTIM RTHE BYSTANDER RTRTHE AGGRESSOR RTRTHE TARGET OR VICTIM RTRTHE BYSTANDER

THE AGGRESSOR- Is the one who is doing the Bullying Behavior THE TARGET OR VICTIM- Is the person being bullied THE BYSTANDER- Is the person watching/seeing the bullying happen

DO YOU THINK GIRLS TYPICALLY BULLY DIFFERENTLY THAN BOYS? HOW?

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE THE BYSTANDER : (Choosing to ignore the bullying is the same as supporting the behavior) 1.Refuse to be an audience for the bullying incident 2. If appropriate and safe, ask the bully to stop (Use words like “Knock it off!” or “Cut it out!”) 3.Be a friend to the victim, invite them to talk with you (Say, “Come play with us” or Can I sit with you at lunch?”) 4.Support the victim-write the victim a note or tell him/her that you don’t agree with the bully 5.Tell an adult (There is a difference between TATTLING and TELLING: the IN/OUT Rule)

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU HAVE BULLY BEHAVIOR ? 1.Realize and identify the problem behavior 2.Acknowledge that you need to change the behavior 3.Apologize for the negative behavior 4.Use the Bully Behavior Change Worksheet 5.Use your conflict management skills to handle the problem. 6.Increase your empathy and concern for others 7.Use your leadership skills to help rather than hurt.

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU ARE A TARGET …SO YOU DON’T BECOME THE VICTIM 1.Use your assertive skills to tell the person to stop. 2.Don’t believe the bully- the bully only has the power if you give it. 3.Value yourself 4.Report bullying incidents that are harmful, dangerous, or destructive. 5.Find safe places and people. 6.Make new friends and try new activities.

Early Signs of Bullying

Victims have trouble sleeping Try to avoid school Claim illness when nothing seems wrong Want you to drive them places when they could walk School work slides Avoid clubs, after school activities

Come home from school unhappy and won’t say why Possessions frequently get “lost” or damaged Become moody, anxious, withdrawn Lose their appetitie Become more aggressive and start bullying others

1.Impulsive 2.Dominant 3. Lack empathy 4.Have difficulty with rules 5.Usually have a small group of “fans”. Understanding children who bully:

Understanding children who are bullied: 1.Usually timid 2.Lack confidence 3.Are easily manipulated by peers 4.Have difficulty with eye contact

Bullies COUNT ON the inaction of peers/adults.

How to Tell If You Bully Others… RThere's a boy or a girl (or maybe more than one) whom you've repeatedly shoved, or punched or physically pushed around in a mean way just because you felt like it. RYou had someone else hurt someone you don't like. RYou've spread a nasty rumor about someone. RThere's a boy or a girl (or maybe more than one) whom you've repeatedly shoved, or punched or physically pushed around in a mean way just because you felt like it. RYou had someone else hurt someone you don't like. RYou've spread a nasty rumor about someone. 34

How to Tell If You Bully Others… RYou and your friends have regularly kept one or more kids from hanging out or playing with you. RYou've teased people in a mean way. RYou've been part of a group that did any of these things. RYou and your friends have regularly kept one or more kids from hanging out or playing with you. RYou've teased people in a mean way. RYou've been part of a group that did any of these things. 35

How Bullying Hurts RIt can mess up a kid's future. Young people who bully are more likely than those who don't bully to skip school and drop out of school. RIt scares some people so much that they skip school. As many as 160,000 students may stay home on any given day. RIt can lead to huge problems later in life. Children who bully are more likely to get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out of school. RIt can mess up a kid's future. Young people who bully are more likely than those who don't bully to skip school and drop out of school. RIt scares some people so much that they skip school. As many as 160,000 students may stay home on any given day. RIt can lead to huge problems later in life. Children who bully are more likely to get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out of school. 36

What You Can Do About Bullying… RIf you are a BYSTANDER → Report the bullying to an adult → Support someone who is being bullied → Stand up to the person doing the bullying → Don’t join in → Don’t try to fight the bully RIf you are a BYSTANDER → Report the bullying to an adult → Support someone who is being bullied → Stand up to the person doing the bullying → Don’t join in → Don’t try to fight the bully 37

What You Can Do About Bullying… RIf you are a VICTIM → Always tell an adult → Stay in a group → If it feels safe, try to stand up to the person who is bullying you → If you are being bullied on-line, don't reply → Join clubs or take part in activities where you'll meet other kids. → Don’t think it’s your fault RIf you are a VICTIM → Always tell an adult → Stay in a group → If it feels safe, try to stand up to the person who is bullying you → If you are being bullied on-line, don't reply → Join clubs or take part in activities where you'll meet other kids. → Don’t think it’s your fault 38

What You Can Do About Bullying… RIf you are a BULLY → Think about what you're doing... and how it affects others. o put yourself in their shoes o think about how it must make them feel o and just don't do it → Talk to an adult RIf you are a BULLY → Think about what you're doing... and how it affects others. o put yourself in their shoes o think about how it must make them feel o and just don't do it → Talk to an adult 39

PWCS and Bullying Rhttp://pwcs.schoolfusion.us/modules/groups/homepagefiles/c ms/493839/File/Regulations/R pdf?sessionid=d99e1b58d5dd430eb75f41f68fa563d0http://pwcs.schoolfusion.us/modules/groups/homepagefiles/c ms/493839/File/Regulations/R pdf?sessionid=d99e1b58d5dd430eb75f41f68fa563d0 Rhttp://pwcs.schoolfusion.us/modules/groups/homepagefiles/c ms/493839/File/Regulations/R pdf?sessionid=d99e1b58d5dd430eb75f41f68fa563d0http://pwcs.schoolfusion.us/modules/groups/homepagefiles/c ms/493839/File/Regulations/R pdf?sessionid=d99e1b58d5dd430eb75f41f68fa563d0 40

Statistics about Bullying ROne out of every four students (22%) report being bullied during the school year (National Center for Educational Statistics, 2015). R19.6% of high school students in the US report being bullied at school in the past year. 14.8% reported being bullied online (Center for Disease Control, 2014).Center for Disease Control, 2014 R64 percent of children who were bullied did not report it; only 36 percent reported the bullying (Petrosina, Guckenburg, DeVoe, and Hanson, 2010). RMore than half of bullying situations (57 percent) stop when a peer intervenes on behalf of the student being bullied (Hawkins, Pepler, and Craig, 2001). RSchool-based bullying prevention programs decrease bullying by up to 25% (McCallion and Feder, 2013). RThe reasons for being bullied reported most often by students were looks (55%), body shape (37%), and race (16%) (Davis and Nixon, 2010). ROne out of every four students (22%) report being bullied during the school year (National Center for Educational Statistics, 2015). R19.6% of high school students in the US report being bullied at school in the past year. 14.8% reported being bullied online (Center for Disease Control, 2014).Center for Disease Control, 2014 R64 percent of children who were bullied did not report it; only 36 percent reported the bullying (Petrosina, Guckenburg, DeVoe, and Hanson, 2010). RMore than half of bullying situations (57 percent) stop when a peer intervenes on behalf of the student being bullied (Hawkins, Pepler, and Craig, 2001). RSchool-based bullying prevention programs decrease bullying by up to 25% (McCallion and Feder, 2013). RThe reasons for being bullied reported most often by students were looks (55%), body shape (37%), and race (16%) (Davis and Nixon, 2010).

YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN OUR SCHOOL, OUR COMMUNITY AND OUR WORLD! YOU CAN HELP BY : Reviewing your own behavior (if there is a bullying behavior then change!) Not allowing yourself to be a victim of bullying behavior Helping when you see a bullying problem.