1. Attraction

2. Theories of Attraction
Attraction as an Attitude
Balance Theories
Reinforcement/Reward Theories
Similarity
Arousal Theories
Fatal Attractions

3. Theories of Attraction
Attraction as an Attitude- an orientation toward or away from a person that consists of a cognitive structure of beliefs and knowledge about the person, affect felt and expressed toward him or her, and behavioral tendencies to approach or avoid that person.
Balance Theories
Life is simpler and attraction is greater when people and things are in harmony
Research indicates attitude alignment as support of this theory (see page 25)

4. Theories of Attraction
Reinforcement/Rewards Theories
Classical Conditioning
Two stimuli are associated through pairing and eventually through association both stimuli elicit the same response
Operant Conditioning
Attraction is based on rewards and punishments
Exchange Theory

5. Similarity Theory Birds of a feather flock together
Attraction increases in direct proportion to increases in similarity between participants and strangers (Byrne & Nelson, 1965)
Three Areas of Similarity that Increase Liking
Demographic Similarity
Attitudes and Values
Personality
Similar cognitive complexities
Similar emotional styles
Attachment styles

6. Similarity: Liking People Like Us
Three Phases of Relationship Development
Stimulus- information about obvious attributes such as sex, age, appearance
Value- information about attitudes, beliefs, and values
Role- information about compatibility in life task roles (parenting, marriage, careers)

7. Similarity: Liking People Like Us
Attraction is Likely to Influence Similarity
People who are attracted become more similar
Discovering Similarity Takes Time
We rarely get to know our partner as well as we think we do.
Misperceptions Linger (consider schoolmates)
Perceived Similarity is Dangerous
There is a higher correlation between perceived similarity and marital satisfaction than between real similarity and marital satisfaction.
To some degree people seem to be married to illusory images of their partners that portray them as similar soulmates

8. Arousal Theory
According to Berscheid (1974), Passion & Attraction are Rooted in:
1) physiological arousal
2) the belief that another person is the cause of the arousal
Misattributions
Excitation Transfer- a type of misattribution in which arousal caused by one stimulus combines with additional arousal caused by a second stimulus, but the first stimulus is ignored
Laughter
Fear
Exercise

9. Fatal Attractions
Fatal Attractions- qualities once seen as alluring and fascinating in a romantic partner that are often the same or very similar to those considered flaws and weaknesses after a breakup
Dissimilarity between partners leads to more breakups, especially when the qualities of dissimilarity were ones that had attraction in the first place.
The more unique or extreme a partner’s qualities the more one might become disillusioned with them

10. Environment: Proximity
To meet people is not necessarily to love them, but to love them we must first meet them!
Convenience
Proximity is rewarding, Distance is costly.
Absence does not seem to make the heart grow fonder
Familiarity
Mere exposure to someone usually increases our liking and attraction for him or her.
Power of Proximity
Overexposure or saturation may not enhance attraction.
Best conclusion from research is that proximity is that is accentuates our feelings about others. Proximity (liking the ones we are near)

11. Environment: Body Language
Characteristics of Attractive Body Language
Stance
Lean Forward
Body Orientation (eg. facing and arms)
Facial Expression
Portrayal of Personality
Visual Interaction
Direct Gaze
Increased Frequency
Emotional Expression Through Body Language

12. Matching Hypothesis
Partners in established relationships tend to have similar levels of physical attractiveness. Why?
The Matching Theory- a theory that suggests that people usually pair off with others of similar status, physical attractiveness, and various other assets and traits.
Could be that similarity is rewarding; opposition is not.
When opposites attract people may be trading one asset for another.
Matching based on the exchange of feminine beauty for masculine status and resources is common place
Leading cause of sexual difficulty among married men is the perception that their wife “let herself go” while they still “look good’.

13. Mate Selection & Evolutionary Psychology
Attraction is important to mate selection and continuation of the race.
Charles Darwin & Natural Selection
Parental Investment- proposes that men and women have different reproductive strategies.
Women invest more in each single offspring and therefore discriminate more
Women seem men with greater earning capacity
Men discriminate less and seek physically attractive mates (sign of health)

14. Evolutionary Psychology: Physical Attractiveness
What is beautiful is good.
If a person is viewed as physically attractive they will be judged as:
Kind, Strong, Outgoing, Nurturant, Sensitive, Sexually Warm and Responsive, Interesting, Sociable, Exciting Dates
Who is pretty?
Women: (baby faced); symmetrical face, large eyes, small nose and chin, and full lips. Idea is that they appear feminine and youthful.
Babies prefer these faces
Men: symmetrical face, strong jaws, broad foreheads – who look strong and dominant (George Clooney)
If you make the average male face for feminine then they are considered more attractive (warm and friendly (Leonardo DiCaprio)

15. Support of the Evolutionary Perspective
Despite cultural differences people around the world agree on what is attractive
Babies are born with preferences for the same faces that adults find attractive
People with symmetrical faces that we find attractive enjoy greater mental health and make better mates
Waist-to-Hip ratios found to be most attractive are associated with greater physical health
Physical attractiveness matters more to people who live in equatorial regions of the world where there are more parasites and pathogens that endanger good health

16. Who has Bias for Beauty
Men prefer an attractive mate more often than women
High Self- Monitors (individuals who are sensitive to the impressions they make on others and regulate their social behavior to meet the demands of different social situations) prefer a more attractive person

17. Costs and Benefits of Beauty
Beautiful people get more dates. Attractive women generally talk more and are more involved.
Handsome men receive more smiles, talk, and positive feelings from others.
There is no correlation between a women’s beauty and the amount of time she spends talking to men. However, men’s looks are correlated with the number and length of interactions they have with women.
More attractive people tend to be less lonely.
Some studies suggest that attractiveness can account for 10% of the variability in peoples adjustment and well being over their lifetime.

18. Costs and Benefits of Beauty
Attractive people are lied to more often
Less likely to trust other people
Compliment result of looks or abilities
Contrast Effect- perceptual phenomenon in which a given object is perceived differently depending on the other objects to which it is compared
HDTV and Pornography

19. So What Do Men and Women Want
Research Indicates that There Are Three Qualities that Are Sought Out In Partners
Warmth and Kindness
Desirable Personality
To Be Liked in Return