2Chapter OutlineThe American Myth: Romantic Love Should Always Lead to MarriageDefining LoveLove in Strong Families: Appreciation and Respect
3Chapter Outline Learning to Love Love over Time: From Passionate to Companionate LoveLove’s Oft-Found Companion: Jealousy
4The American Myth: Romantic Love Should Always Lead to Marriage Implies that love is the one indispensable ingredient that should determine whom and when a person marries.A corollary to the myth states that love will overcome all, never mind the obstacles.Because Americans tend to believe the romantic myth, numerous marriages have little other than love going for them and the union dissolves because the couple has no basis on which to build a lasting relationship.
5Defining LoveThe ancient Greeks divided love into a number of elements:Ludus (game-playing love)Storge (friendship love)Mania (possessive/dependent love).
6Defining LoveFor the Greeks, the three most important types of love leading to more successful intimate relationships are:Eros (carnal or physical love)Agape (spiritual love)Philos (brotherly or friendly love).
7The Wheel as a Model of Love Insert FIGURE 3-1 The Wheel as a Model of Love?
8The Wheel as a Model of Love Stage 1 The Rapport StagePartners are struck by the feelings that they have known each other before.They are comfortable with each other, and both want to deepen the relationship.Discussion of previous figure?
9The Wheel as a Model of Love Stage 2 The Self-revelation StageThe partners share more intimate feelings.This deepens the relationship because such sharing is only done with special people.Self-disclosure is associated with increased commitment, mutual trust, and love.Discussion of previous figure?
10The Wheel as a Model of Love Stage 3 Mutual DependenceAs sharing becomes more intimate, a feeling of mutual dependence develops.Falling in love provides a sense of very rapid expansion of the boundaries of self. There comes a feeling of loss when the partner is absent.Discussion of previous figure?
11The Wheel as a Model of Love Stage 4 IntimacyThe partners experience more intimacy and need fulfillment as they deepen their relationship.Discussion of previous figure?
12The Triangle of LoveInsert The Triangle of Love, Figure 3.2?
13Elements of Love Nonlove: Absence of all three elements. Liking: Intimacy without passion or commitment.Infatuation: Passion without intimacy or commitment.Romantic love: Intimacy and passion without commitment .
14Elements of LoveCompanionate love: Intimacy and commitment without passion.Fatuous love: Passion and commitment without intimacy.Empty love: Commitment without passion and intimacy.Consummate love: Combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment.
15Theories on Love Romantic Love Infatuation Loving and Liking The Double CrossLove Is What You Make It
16Love in Strong Families: Appreciation and Respect In strong families where there is a mature loving relationship, the expression of appreciation permeates the relationship.Mature love will always include appreciation of the loved ones, including the spouse, children, parents, grandparents, or simply good friends.
17Negative BehaviorA vicious circle is a pattern of behavior in which a negative behavior provokes a negative reaction, which, in turn, prompts more negative behavior.
18SocializationThe process of passing society’s values on to new members that begins at birth.
19Developmental Stages Self-Love Stage: Infancy and Early Childhood Parental Identification Stage: Early and Middle ChildhoodGroup Stage: Late Childhood and PreadolescenceHeterosexual Adult Stage
20JealousyThe state of being resentfully suspicious of a loved one’s behavior toward a suspected rival.