* Having difficult conversations Lorna Wilson 14 th November

The 4 key elements face the problem understanding conflict techniques you can use prepare

The catastrophic fantasy Things will get worse We’ll be rejected or attacked We’ll hurt the other person The relationship will suffer Conceptual nature – “I don’t have the skills…”

Organisational Consequences? “collective cowardice” Reward positive v ignore negative No consequences for poor performers

What is conflict? “A condition between workers whose jobs are interdependent, who feel angry, who perceive the other's, as being at fault and who act in ways that cause a business problem” Daniel Dana: Conflict Resolution

Causes of conflict include: Management style Poor management Lack of “face to face” communication Lack of clarity around job role/objectives Personality clashes Change Harassment – real or perceived Bullying – real or perceived Working environment

Effects of conflict include: Absence Low morale Poor performance Stress Use of formal procedures Legal action Public arguments

Personal Conflict Styles Avoid Accommodate Compete Collaborate

Benefits of the ‘Collaborative’ style Win/Win solution Better decisions Builds relationships Greater satisfaction Longer lasting solutions

Techniques you can use T E X T body language rapport use silence show empathy

Prepare think about the outcome consider your approach gather the documents you need gather information

Structure the conversation set the appropriate tone state what the issues are give evidence and examples focus on the problem and not the person ask for an explanation agree a way forward provide support

How Acas can help mediation training e-learning website acas.org.uk publications Customer services team Acas helpline