Group Project The dilemma Group 3 – Benny, Tao, Ruth

The facts MAN, 25, wants to marry someone he know. He loves computer games, he smokes and drinks, enjoy hanging out with friends. His parents own a big company and The man would like to marry a girl smart, beautiful and gentle, good at cooking, independent, someone his parents approve of. He don't want his wife play games, smoke and drink, but he don't want his wife stop him when he want to or when he wants to hang out with his friends.

The options GIRL A, less smart, very beautiful, aggressive, unruly, loving computer games, likes smoking and drinking, good at cooking, full time employed earning a respectable salary in a clerical position. GIRL B, smart, less beautiful but not ugly, good temper, gentle, no idea about games, hating smoking and drinking, very sociable, not good at cooking, not employed but waiting for a job opportunity that interest her.

Prerequisite Both Girl A and Girl B would like to marry the man.

HA Heteronomy Authoritarian and constrained thoughts Autonomy Systematic, critical and holistic searching Reflexes or emotional reactions (Dominated by one automatic thought) - I want to please my parents! - My friends are important! - Future kids should have parents they are proud of! - A beautiful wife will impress my friends! Valid, relevant values, interests etc. (Who is affected? What are their values?) - Which woman has what is needed for a long-term marriage? - Is it better to please family and friends of myself? - Who will make a better wife and mother? Dogmatic and uncritical thoughts (Fixation to one important principle) - I should marry someone who likes my friends! - I should marry a girl my parents approve! - Obviously I should marry who is most beautiful! - My wife should be able to cook! Possible actions and values (What can be done? How are all values affected?) - Marry a calm woman, less arguments and more acceptance of my behavior? - Choose a woman who my parents like, once my parents happy I’ll also be happy?

AT Autonomous thinking All principles, values, interests, duties, feelings, needs etc. of all involved parts Man: Beautiful Man: SmartMan: Good at cookingMan: No interruption when playing Parents: CookingParents: Gentle All reasonable alternative actions to solve the problem Marry Girl A Possibilities: Satisfied Risks: Possibilities Risks: Unsatisfied Possibilities: May be good in the future Risks: Will always be bad Possibilities: Most likely no interruption Risks: Possibilities: Risks: Cannot take care of family Possibilities: Risks: Conflicts arising Marry Girl B Possibilities: Risks: Unsatisfied Possibilities: Satisfied Risks: Possibilities: Risks: Possibilities: Risks: Interruption Possibilities: Take care of family Risks: Possibilities: No conflicts Risks: Autonomous thinking All principles, values, interests, duties, feelings, needs etc. of all involved parts Parents: Smart Children: CookingChildren: GentleChildren: No drinking and smokingFriends: GamingFriends: Drinking All reasonable alternative actions to solve the problem Marry Girl A Possibilities: They may inherit the mans smartness Risks: Children not being smart Possibilities: Risks: Disliking their mother for her bad cooking Possibilities: Risks: Disliking her mother for never being gentle Possibilities: Risks: Disliking their mother, may also be treated badly due to drinking Possibilities: No interruption Risks: Possibilities: No interruption Risks: Marry Girl B Possibilities: Children will most likely be smart Risks: Possibilities: Satisfied Risks: Children turning fat Possibilities: Satified Risks: Possibilities: Satisfied, more stable environment Risks: Possibilities: Risks: Interruption Possibilities: Risks: Interruption Autonomous thinking All principles, values, interests, duties, feelings, needs etc. of all involved parts Friends: Smoking All reasonable alternative actions to solve the problem Marry Girl A Possibilities: No interruption Risks: Marry Girl B Possibilities: Risks: Interruption

Collab link userID=76

COllab beautiful She is very beautiful. She is very beautiful. He is obsessive to her beauty She is not beautiful, but not ugly smart She is not so smart but not stupid She is very smart. He don't need to worry about a lot. good at cooking She is not good at cooking, but she may be good in futrue She is good at cooking, and he loves her food no interruption when playing She loves playing too, so will not object to his playing She will interrupt him when he is playing

The man's parents good at cooking She is not good at cooking, so can't tare care of family She is good at cooking, so can tare care of family gentle She is not gentle, not easy to get alongShe is gentle, easy to get along smart She is not smart, so her children will be not smart, too She is smart, so her children will be smart, too

The man's friends loving computer games no interruptioninterruption loving drinking no interruptioninterruption loving smoking no interruptioninterruption

The man's children good at cooking They don't like a mother good at cooking They need a mother good at cooking gentle They need gentle mother no drinking and smoking no drinking and smoking mother

Evaluation The Tools are useful for us to identifying interests/values as well as identifying risks with different decisions. It would seem like the order of business is the following: First you start with the OLE, depending a bit on the type of problem you have, it seems to be formulated for projects and IT use so we could not use it for our problem. Next one uses the HA, to identify Heteronomy and Autonomy sides, to find interests and principles. These one can later input into the AT, EthXpert or ColLab. Even though the AT is simple in its layout it will soon turn very messy as one tries to have many interests. From our point of view it seems almost simpler to attack the ColLab instantly. Both ColLab and EthXpert seems to simplify the Autonomy method, but the better one is ColLab since then it is web deployed and there is a possibility of collaborating with others on these projects, they worked well according to us. The autonomy method is very helpful in decision making and ColLab highlights and simplifies it so that one can perform it with ease. Some notes on possible improvements: First regarding the AT if you do it on a computer it would most likely to be better if one replaces the columns and rows, since for the most part there are more interests than there are possible options. Secondly there could be an export function to Excel in both EthXpert and ColLab.