Foundations of Team Leadership 6b-1 Foundations of Team Leadership Active Listening One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know that at least one person is listening …Anonymous

Foundations of Team Leadership Communications Challenges One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know that at least one person is listening …Anonymous

Foundations of Team Leadership 6b-3 Highest of Respect Receptive Body Stance Effective Questions Paraphrasing Silence Attentive Listening Clarification

Foundations of Team Leadership 6b-4 Active Listening Is Disciplined Focused Active But what if we had to listen to collect a $million prize? Active Listening Is Hard Work- Clients have been heard to say that Bank Staff is arrogant…. Poor listening skills?

Foundations of Team Leadership 6b-5 What Is Required for Active Listening? Ears– Alert so as to grasps the sender’s words & intentions Eyes – Focusing & defocusing one’s gaze as culturally appropriate Mouth – Mostly silent-Resisting the need to deliver one’s opinion or show off one’s expertise Body- Reflecting the speaker’s body position to better assume an empathetic posture and cultural sensitivity Brain – Quietening the chatter-Stopping the tendency to develop one’s counter argument- Keeping the mind from drifting Heart – Willingness to listen- Extending the highest mark of respect to another

Foundations of Team Leadership Sending speaker clues about your undivided attention: Head-nodding To draw out additional information Body Language To reflect the speaker’s body language in your own body’s position Leaning forward to show interest- maintaining eye exchange where appropriate Short prompting actions or statements Huh-huh…Go on… Silence To provide the speaker with time to reflect … 6b-6 Summary Active Listening Non Verbal Tools

Foundations of Team Leadership No interruptions Listening with whole being Non-verbal eliciting signals (nods, appropriate eye contact) Open/mirroring body posture Non –verbal or very short prompts (Go on, huh-huh) Practice of Silent Tools 6b-7

Foundations of Team Leadership Active Listening Pairing for Exercise#1 1.Pair with someone you not worked with so far.. 2.Two roles: “A” = will share their ‘business’ or challenge “B” = will practice active listening skills. Time: 3 minutes for the first round (A tells B about situation) Switch roles- same rules 3 minutes for the second round (B tells A about situation). 3. What did it feel like… Being Listened to? …ONLY Listening ? 6b-8 It Is the Highest Form of Respect One Can Pay Anyone

Foundations of Team Leadership Clarification Clarifying Getting more information in order to better understand Asking for it to be repeated or probing more deeply Sample language: ‘ I am sorry for interrupting but did you say … ? Could you explain a little more … ? ’ NOTE: It is always permissible to interrupt for clarification- These questions indicate that one is paying attention

Foundations of Team Leadership Paraphrasing Summarizing and reflecting back to Speaker what they are saying (important points) but in your own words Sample language Let me summarize so I am sure I understand everything… If I heard you correctly, you are saying… 6b-10 Helps listener grasp message more accurately Helps the speaker feel listened to Promotes a better basis upon which to come to mutual understanding NOTE: Paraphrasing in a TEAM situation is stating the consensus that seems to be developing OR asking for clarification about stage in the conversation

Foundations of Team Leadership Support &appreciate, but be genuine… “ That’s quite a feat” Reflect empathy “ That must have been difficult” Be discipline- Do not give in to impatience or distraction Your speaker should have all of your attention Rapport-Building Statements 6b-11

Foundations of Team Leadership Supporting Speaker through Correct Use of Questioning Source: L Carry Workshop. Closed Questions - Hard Inquiry Do you have a Pet? Is It a ….Does it ….Are you going to…? Open Ended Questions- Informative Inquiry Tell me about your Pet…. Why does it make you so happy… Differences in Approach? How it feels…How much is surfaced? When to Use Open Ended versus Closed Questions

Foundations of Team Leadership Silent Listening Tools & Non-Verbal Signals Sending speaker clues about your disciplined interest: Rapport Building (genuine appreciation or empathy) Oh my- that is very impressive…That must have been hard… Clarifying I am sorry for interrupting but did you say … Could you explain a little more … ? ’ Paraphrasing Let me summarize so I am sure I understand everything… If I heard you correctly, you are saying… Asking the Right Kind of Questions Open Ended versus Closed Questions 6b-13 Summary Active Listening Verbal Guidelines

Foundations of Team Leadership Practice of Verbal Tools 6b-14 Listening Actively and Engaging in:  Rapport-building Statements  Clarification Questions  Paraphrasing  Open Ended Questions

Foundations of Team Leadership Active Listening Pairing for Exercise #2 1.Pair with same person you did exercise #1 with.. 2.Two roles: “A” = will share what they have been thinking of doing about their situation “B” = will practice active verbal listening skills. Time: 3 minutes for the first round (A tells B about situation) Switch roles- same rules 3 minutes for the second round (B tells A about situation). 3. What did it feel like… Did a better platform of understanding evolve form which to better understand and …make suggestions…share experiences…offer insights? 6b-15 It Is the Highest Form of Consulting One can Practice

Foundations of Team Leadership First Rules of Consultative Interaction: Listen, listen, listen… Guidelines First Seek to Understand Listen (With all of body senses & keeping mind quiet & focused) Check your understanding of what is being said… Try to see issue from speaker’s perspective (open mind) Refrain from trying to solve client’s problem (too quickly) Stay Engaged Clarify to make sure you are understanding correctly Paraphrase Listen empathically (genuine rapport building) A sk open ended questions to elicit more disclosure Purpose: Open Communications From Which to Build an Effective Client Relationship Active Listening in Professional Consulting

Open FTL Leadership and Organizational Effectiveness Effective Listening Guidelines & Exercise 6b-17

Foundations of Team Leadership Actions? NA? Specific Comments Why Effective or Not? Effectively used short prompts Used silences/pauses effectively Used Body Language well Made rapport-building statements (reflect/verbalize feelings) Paraphrased what was being said Clarified- To seek new information and/or perspective Asked Open Ended Questions Asked Open Ended Questions ROLE PLAY- 2 Rounds Role ‘A’ Person speaking. Person A will inform Person B on how well they listen Role “B” Person B listens to speaker A relate a story & monitors their own attentiveness 6b-18