McGraw-Hill/Irwin 2010 Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 ACHIEVING EMOTIONAL CONTROL Chapter 10

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 The Eight Forms of Intelligence Howard Gardner proposed eight intelligences: Language Math and logic Music Spatial reasoning Movement Interpersonal intelligence Intrapersonal intelligence Naturalist intelligence

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 The Eight Forms of Intelligence DimensionDescriptionType of Individuals Associated with the Dimension LanguagePeople who have verbal intelligence, love language, and are fascinated by its meanings, expressions, and rhythms. Writers, poets, songwriters, and speakers Math and Logic Individuals who enjoy puzzles of logic or brain teasers are strong in this type of intelligence. Most of the standardized intelligence tests measure math and logic ability levels. Scientists and mathematicians

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 The Eight Forms of Intelligence DimensionDescriptionType of Individuals Associated with the Dimension MusicMost people whose intelligence falls into this category have a relationship with sounds. If you can play, write, or read music with ease and enjoyment, you have this strength. Favorite musician or musical group Spatial Reasoning A person who excels in this area has a knack for seeing how elements fit together in space. It is physical and mechanical, and less tied to ideas and concepts. Sculptures and architecture

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 The Eight Forms of Intelligence DimensionDescriptionType of Individuals Associated with the Dimension MovementThe ability to use body or body parts to solve problems is a type of intelligence. Also known as kinesthetic intelligence. * Athletes and dancers like Ballet dancers. Interpersonal Intelligence Deals with one’s ability to understand and deal with the world of people. Essential skill in all aspects of life, particularly in business. People holding positions of power and leadership; respected by others.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 The Eight Forms of Intelligence DimensionDescription Intrapersonal Intelligence Means knowledge of oneself. A person with this intelligence is introspective; They know their strengths, weaknesses, desires, and fears—and can act on that knowledge realistically. Naturalist Intelligence A person high in this intelligence has an understanding of nature and natural processes. People who are happiest outdoors and have a natural understanding of the natural world have this strength. Such knowledge can raise the level of an organization’s creative output.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Emotional Intelligence Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to see and control your own emotions and to understand the emotional states of other people. Emotional competence is an extremely important factor in understanding EI. * IQ tests are not a good predictor of intelligence

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Emotional Intelligence Emotional competence results in outstanding performance at work. The two types of emotional competence are personal competence and social competence. The four areas of emotional intelligence, called clusters, are self-awareness, social awareness, self-management, and relationship management.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Emotional Intelligence Self-awareness is the ability to understand the way one is “coming off” to other people. Social awareness is a set of skills that allows a person to understand the politics of the workplace.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Emotional Intelligence Self-management is the ability to hold oneself and not overreact when something is bothersome. Relationship management enables an individual to communicate effectively and to build meaningful interpersonal relationship both with individuals and with groups.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Learning to Apply Emotional Intelligence A few practical approaches to improve EI are: Review what you know about self-awareness. Carefully watch others whose social competence seems to be high, who have social awareness skills that you don’t have but would like to attain. Work actively on improving your self-management skills. Develop relationship management skills.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Dealing with Anger Anger Comes more from how we process events than the nature of the events themselves. ** Occurs when one is convinced that other people are to blame for deliberately and unnecessarily causing trouble. Arises when one interprets the behavior of other people as breaking the rules of appropriate behavior.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Dealing with Anger Anger produces results that are negative and damaging. It prevents the individual to look at other ways of seeing reality. It blinds the individual to their responsibility for what has happened. It blinds one to other, less painful ways of dealing with the problem. It increases, if left unchecked. Anger is often based on fear of some type.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Dealing with Anger Steps for dealing with anger: 1. Ascertain the causes that triggered your anger in a given situation; a few causes might include fatigue, excessive stress, and factors such as excessive alcohol intake. 2. * Examine specifically the damage your anger has caused. 3. Work on developing and using conflict management skills. 4. Think about constructive ways to help calm you down.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Assertiveness, Aggressiveness, and Anger Assertiveness means standing up for one’s rights without threatening the self- esteem of the other person. It is important to use when one senses that someone is trying to take advantage of him or her.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Assertiveness, Aggressiveness, and Anger Aggressiveness involves hurting others and putting them on the defensive. When one’s equal rights as a human being are threatened, he or she might be either passive or aggressive, both of which are damaging.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Defensive Behaviors Defensiveness is the inappropriate reaction to others behavior as though it was an attack. ** It usually comes from two sources: low self-esteem and fear.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Defensive Behaviors Common defensive reactions used in the workplace: ** Counterattack - Involves responding with an attack when felt under attack. Passive-aggressive behavior - Expression of an understated rage. ** Pointless explanations - Stems from a belief that the other person has been on the attack only because that person “doesn’t understand.” Creating a distraction - It introduces a point or fact that is irrelevant to the issue at hand; Also called using a “red herring.”

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Defensive Behaviors Steps to reduce defensiveness: Take a bit of time to get refocused and get a renewed perspective. Use “I statements.” Avoid absolute words like always and never. Make positive assumptions about other people involved. Learn to separate your work from who you are.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Scripts The concept of script has been used to explain some important facts about human behavior. Scripts are divided into four categories - cultural scripts, family scripts, religious scripts, and gender scripts.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Games People Play Game is an encounter between two people that produces a “payoff” for the one who starts the game, at the expense of the other player. Games are usually emotion-based activities, don’t really help any of the players. They cause damage to the organization - wasted time, lowered morale, and decreased output.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Games People Play Two common characteristics of games: At least one insincere statement per game. A payoff of some kind to at least one of the players. Games vary in terms of intensity: First-degree games: quite harmless. Second-degree games: harmful and cause danger. Third-degree games: result in physical injury.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Games People Play Examples of common workplace games: “Why Don’t You... Yes, But”: The person reassures both them self and the other individual that “Nobody’s going to tell me what to do.” Blemish: A trivia game where the pay-off to a player is a temporary boost to his or her ego. Wooden Leg: The focus is on excuses. Also known as “My Excuses Are Better Than Yours.”

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Games People Play Examples of common workplace games (cont.): Harried (or Harried Executive): Played by someone who uses being “too busy” as an excuse to not interact with others. Now I’ve Got You : One person tries to trap the other in a mistake, a lie, or some other type of negative situation.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Games People Play ** Office politics is a larger game that contains combinations of other games. Game playing prevents employees from enjoying open, honest relationships with others.

Parts taken from Human Relations 4ed Modified by Jackie Kroening 2011 Strategies for Success Stopping games before they start: 1. Work on your self-esteem. 2. Try to remain rational, regardless of the other person’s state of mind. 3. Try to get the other person to be rational and honest. 4. Give positive feedback to other people. 5. De-emphasize the weaknesses of others.