What do other people think dignity means ….?

Being with my family and feeling useful rather than a nuisance Ensuring we have the privacy you would want to have for yourself Knowing I won’t remember and telling me again without showing your irritation Remembering that you who still have your youth will lose it very quickly Treating us all individually, respecting diversity, and different cultures By representing my wishes if I am unable to do so myself Maintaining the respect we had when we had jobs and status in society Listening to me rather than just talking at me

Dignity, what does it mean to you? Being a part of a meeting – not just a spare part with nothing of any importance to say People not talking over me & about me as if I wasn’t there Oh – everything about being in control of my own life and not wearing clothes that aren’t mine Your respect gives me my dignity Making my own choices and decisions, not having someone else ‘allowing’ me do things Not making fun of me or being patronizing Treating me as your equal Dignity is when someone cares for your father with respect, treating him like an equal adult not a child, genuinely listening to what he is trying to say not just pretending to listen

FOLLOWING ARE QUOTES ‘What dignity means to me’ From clients, families, friends and staff

“Being treated as an individual not a widget” “Giving me Time” “Being Polite and Respectful” “Being Honest with me” “Being Interested in me” “Playing music I like” “Remembering this is my home, not just your place of work”

“Giving me space” “In Austria they treat strangers better than they treat people they know – I like that” “My time being well used” “I knew a resident who could only move her eyes so the care practitioners knew to let her look at the perfume she wanted to wear that day – so it was her choice – That’s dignity to me”

“When someone takes the time to understand what I can and can’t do” “I know the staff don’t always have a lot of time, but I must say they do try to give me time the time I need”. “Being given privacy and time - I don’t want to feel rushed on the toilet – nobody would, would they?” “Losing my dignity was something I never considered until I lost it! I think that’s because we take it for granted. You have your dignity when you are in control of yourself, when you have a job, when people look up to you and treat you as an equal. You know when you have lost it – you feel so belittled, so angry and so helpless – the trouble is you have no way of getting it back on your own!”

“I hate it when people talk across me. It doesn’t happen much to be honest, most of the staff are really good about chatting to me when they are doing things. Some take a real interest in my music collection which is nice – and funny – especially when the young ones like my 60s stuff!” “Being able to put yourself in my shoes and think about how you’d like to be treated.” “I know I can’t do what I did before, but I need people to think about what I can do – it’s what keeps me going to be honest. The day is just too long otherwise.” “Sheila knows just how I like things. I miss her when she’s on holiday, but she is very good at telling the others. I bet she bosses them actually!” “Its really important where my glasses are left at night so I can get reach them first thing. “ “Dignity is ‘my side’ of respect, if you respect me I will have dignity”

“I love to see mum looking the way she did at home. She has always been very ‘done’ and I know how important it is to her” “It is nice to hear people talking to Ron about things we talk about as a family. It feels like they know him really well” “Being sensitive to things he can’t do anymore. I know it upsets Dad that he can’t do things, but the staff handle it really well, they seem to sensitively do the things he can’t do and put more focus on the things he can do – which I know makes him feel better. It’s a real skill.” “Dignity is not having an open backed gown, or being taken on a hoist down the corridor or having people laughing at you”

“Dignity is when you see someone caring for your father with respect, treating him like an equal adult not a child, genuinely listening to what he is trying to say not just pretending to listen” “Dignity is such a hard thing to express because you don’t always have the words, but it is a certain tone of voice, sharing a joke a touch as they pass that sends the message that you are OK, they respect you, they understand” “I know we shouldn’t lump people together and stereotype them but I do think it must be hard for people who work in the NHS or social care to ‘carry dignity’ with them because they must have such different attitudes to those of us who work in other sectors. Carrying out really personal and intimate tasks for other people must dull your own attitudes towards exposing your body. Perhaps if you work in the sector for a long time you forget what it is like to be shy or reserved because all the things that make the rest of us squirm with embarrassment are taken for granted?“

To me Dignity is…