1. 10/11/2015 Makin’ It Work Lesson 7: Identifying Goals Module III: Solving Problems Logically © 2008 by Steve Parese, Ed.D. Transitioning from Corrections to Community and the World of Work

2. 10/11/2015 Words of Wisdom “Focus on SOLUTIONS, not on BLAME.” What do you get out of this? How does it apply to you?

3. 10/11/2015 1. Refer back to last story about Anna 2. Frame our own goal statements 3. Frame reverse goal statements from the other point of view 4. Review & MiniQuiz Today’s Lesson Today’s lesson will focus on identifying realistic goals for work-related problems, from BOTH perspectives.

4. 10/11/20151. Recall Problem Solving Steps 5. Choose 5. Choose & Act 4. Choices & 4. Choices & Consequences Consequences 3. Identify 3. Identify Goal Goal 2. Define 2. Define Problem

5. 10/11/2015 Remember: Problem Solving is like using a road map when you’re lost in unfamiliar country. Step 1: Stop & Think. Pull over and consult the map. Step 2: Define Problem. Figure out where you are NOW. Step 3: Identify Goal. Figure out where you WANT to be. Step 4: Consider Choices & Consequences. Weigh the pro’s and con’s of all possible routes. Step 5: Choose & Act. Choose the best route to reach your goal. Get back on the road.

6. 10/11/2015 Remember: Problem Solving is like using a road map when you’re lost in unfamiliar country. Step 3: Identify Goal. Figure out where you WANT to be. Your goal is just your DESTINATION, not your ROUTE. A goal statement describes a positive outcome to the problem situation, not your strategy for accomplishing it. Today’s lesson focuses on

7. 10/11/2015 Anna’s Problem Statement Anna was talking with the other women at Hope House, getting ready for a job interview the next day. Recall what she was feeling, and why. What was her problem statement? ANNA’S PROBLEM STATEMENT: “I am __________about _______________.” a. "I am confused about how to handle questions about my past in tomorrow's job interview." b. "I am worried I won't get Jenna back if I don't get a job right away." c. "I am scared because I'm feeling the urge to use again."

8. 10/11/2015 About Goal Statements A problem statement helps us figure out what’s really wrong. A goal statement helps us identify how we’d like things to be instead.

9. 10/11/2015 2. Identifying Goals 2. Identifying ….. Goals Framing Good Goal Statements Keep it SIMPLE (What you really want, and possibly want to avoid.) Keep it SELF-FOCUSED (On what YOU can do or change.) “I want _______________ (without _________________).” “I’d like _______________ (but not _________________).” POS’T OUTCOME NEG OUTCOME NEG OUTCOME

10. 10/11/2015 Damon’s Goal Statement Situation: Damon came in 15 minutes late one morning. His supervisor tried to pull him aside, but Damon played it off and acted like it was no big deal. His boss ended up yelling at him in front of his co-workers. POOR GOAL STATEMENT: “I want my boss to treat me with more respect!” GOOD GOAL STATEMENT: “I want to straighten things out with my boss, without losing my job.” Why is the second one better?

11. 10/11/2015 Goal Statement Examples Situation #1: Your kids have the day off from school. They’ve called you 6 times this morning complaining that they’re bored. Complete the examples on page 40 Write a Better Goal Statement: “I want ____________________ (but without _________________).” Positive Outcome Optional Negative Outcome Problem Statement: ”I am irritated at my kids because they’ve called me 6 times today.” Poor Goal Statement: ”I wish my kids would just leave me alone when I’m at work.”

12. 10/11/2015 Better Goal Statements Situation #1: Your kids have the day off from school. They’ve called you 6 times this morning complaining that they’re bored. Complete the examples on page 40 Better Goal Statements: “I want to explain to my kids why they can’t call me at work with minor problems.” “I want to find some ways to keep my kids better occupied when they are home from school.” Problem Statement: ”I am irritated at my kids because they’ve called me 6 times today.”

13. 10/11/2015 Goal Statement Examples Complete the examples on page 40 Write a Better Goal Statement: “I want ____________________ (but without _________________).” Positive Outcome Optional Negative Outcome Problem Statement: ”I am upset that my coworker reported me to our supervisor.” Poor Goal Statement: ”I want to teach him a lesson so he’ll never do it again.” Situation #2: You’re stocking shelves when an old friend walks in. The two of you spend 15 minutes laughing, drawing angry looks from your coworker.

14. 10/11/2015 Better Goal Statements Complete the examples on page 40 Problem Statement: ”I am upset that my coworker reported me to our supervisor.” Situation #2: You’re stocking shelves when an old friend walks in. The two of you spend 15 minutes laughing, drawing angry looks from your coworker. Better Goal Statements: ”I want to talk with my coworker about coming to me first with problems, but without scaring him." "I want to just let this incident go, not let it turn into a major issue between my coworker and me."

15. 10/11/2015 2. Identifying Goals 2. Identifying ….. Goals Framing Reverse Goal Statements Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Try to imagine what motivated their behavior. “I guess s/he probably wanted __________ (without __________).” “Maybe s/he was hoping ____________ (without _____________).” POS’T OUTCOME NEG OUTCOME NEG OUTCOME

16. 10/11/2015 Damon’s Reverse Goal Statement Situation: Damon came in 15 minutes late one morning. His supervisor tried to pull him aside, but Damon played it off and acted like it was no big deal. His boss ended up yelling at him in front of his co-workers. REVERSE GOAL STATEMENT: “I guess my supervisor wanted me to know how important it is to be on time… without having to make a big scene about it.”

17. 10/11/2015 Reverse Goal Statement Examples Situation #1: Your kids have the day off from school. They’ve called you 6 times this morning complaining that they’re bored. Complete the examples on page 41 Reverse Goal Statement: “I guess my kids probably want ____________ (without __________).” Positive Outcome Optional Neg Outcome Write a Reverse Goal Statement, considering the situation from your children’s point of view.

18. 10/11/2015 Reverse Goal Statement Examples Situation #1: Your kids have the day off from school. They’ve called you 6 times this morning complaining that they’re bored. Complete the examples on page 41 Good Reverse Goal Statements: ”I guess my kids probably want something fun to do.” ”I guess my kids want me to know how miserable they are."

19. 10/11/2015 Reverse Goal Statement Examples Situation #2: You’re stocking shelves when an old friend walks in. The two of you spend 15 minutes laughing, drawing angry looks from your coworker. Complete the examples on page 41 Write a Reverse Goal Statement, considering the situation from your coworker’s point of view. Reverse Goal Statement: “I guess my coworker probably wanted __________ (without ______).” Positive Outcome Optional Neg Outcome

20. 10/11/2015 Reverse Goal Statement Examples Situation #2: You’re stocking shelves when an old friend walks in. The two of you spend 15 minutes laughing, drawing angry looks from your coworker. Complete the examples on page 41 Good Reverse Goal Statements: "I guess my coworker probably wanted me to do my share of the work without having to face me directly.” "I guess my coworker wants to let me know he resented what I did, without coming right out and saying it."

21. 10/11/2015 Anna’s Goal Statement Anna was getting overwhelmed talking with the other women at Hope House. She was thinking about the job interview the next day, and wishing for something to “take the edge off.” Before she makes a big mistake, Anna has to stop & think. Then she must define her problem and goal, keeping in mind the things that are most important to her. What is most important to her in the long run?

22. 10/11/2015 Anna’s Goal Statement 1 Anna was getting overwhelmed talking with the other women at Hope House. She was thinking about the job interview the next day, and wishing for something to “take the edge off.” Before she makes a big mistake, Anna has to stop & think. Then she must define her problem and goal, keeping in mind the things that are most important to her. If Anna’s PROBLEM STATEMENT is: "I am confused about how to handle questions about my past in tomorrow's job interview." Then what should her GOAL STATEMENT be? "I want to know the best way to answer questions about my incarceration and drug use."

23. 10/11/2015 Anna’s Goal Statement 2 Anna was getting overwhelmed talking with the other women at Hope House. She was thinking about the job interview the next day, and wishing for something to “take the edge off.” Before she makes a big mistake, Anna has to stop & think. Then she must define her problem and goal, keeping in mind the things that are most important to her. If Anna’s PROBLEM STATEMENT is: “I am worried that I won't get Jenna back if I don't get a job right away." Then what should her GOAL STATEMENT be? "I want to know how long I have to get a job before I risk losing Jenna for good."

24. 10/11/2015 Anna’s Goal Statement 3 Anna was getting overwhelmed talking with the other women at Hope House. She was thinking about the job interview the next day, and wishing for something to “take the edge off.” Before she makes a big mistake, Anna has to stop & think. Then she must define her problem and goal, keeping in mind the things that are most important to her. If Anna’s PROBLEM STATEMENT is: “I am scared because I'm feeling the urge to use again." Then what should her GOAL STATEMENT be? "I want to find a way to get through this night without relapsing."

25. 10/11/2015 Group Activity What about YOUR Goal Statement? Think about your hot spot situation. Copy your Problem Statement from page 37 onto page 41. We will work together as a group to create good Goal Statements for your situations.

26. 10/11/2015 KEY POINT #1 KEY POINT #1 Identifying a good goal keeps us focused on solving the problem, rather than looking for someone to blame.

27. 10/11/2015 KEY POINT #2 KEY POINT #2 Trying to understand what the OTHER person probably wanted can help us see their behavior in a new light, and do a better job finding a common solution.

28. 10/11/2015 MiniQuiz #7 Let’s complete the MiniQuiz in the workbook and review it as a group. √

29. 10/11/2015 Today’s Words of Wisdom: “Focus on SOLUTIONS, not on BLAME.” How does this fit in with our lesson? What is ONE THING you learned in this class that you will remember after leaving?