Agenda To Get: To Do: Handouts from the back shelf Notes from the last two classes Trophy Wife Reading To Do: 2 part opener – use previous notes to ID behaviors Guided Notes: Loving and Liking Trophy Wife Reading w/ questions (participation points) Discuss Ideal Partner drawings from last class Homework Assignment: Increasing Intimacy

Openers – 2 Parts You will need your guided notes from the past to class to reference to help you identify possible answers to the following videos.

Interpersonal Attraction Flight of the Concords – The Most Beautiful Girl https://youtu.be/9jLDZjMF3tk Why is the girl he is singing about so attractive? (where is she and what is the term to describe this type of attraction?) 2. He attributes many other qualities to her that might not necessarily be true; what is this called?

Part 2 Nicole Kidman and Jimmy Fallon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qtsNbxgPngA Determine if these two individuals STILL like each other 8 years after the only time they “dated.” 1. What sort of distance do they use? 2. What are their proxemics? 3. What are their CURRENT situational demands? 4. What is the level of self-disclosure? 5. What is the likelihood of homogamy between them as a possible couple?

Loving and Liking – Dating, Rating, Mating Romantic love – marked by high levels of interpersonal attraction and emotional arousal Sexual desire is regarded as an important part of romantic attraction – especially in Western cultures Liking – affection without passion or deep commitment (just friends…) Culturally, women tend to express feelings of love, towards friends, more than men Mutual absorption in romantic love – lovers attend almost exclusively to on another Idealization maintains absorption – blinded to partners faults but also helps each partner create the relationship they wish for

Love and Attachment Roots of romantic relationships may lie in childhood (but not in a Freudian way…) Early attachments to caregivers can have a lasting impact on how we relate to others Studies of dating couples have identified secure, avoidant, and ambivalent attachment patterns similar to early child development Nationally 59% of adults have secure attachment 25% avoidant 11% anxious attachment People use early attachment experiences to build mental models about affectionate relationships Quality of childhood bonds to parents or other caregivers may hold a key to understanding how we approach romantic relationships.

Ambivalent Attachment Secure Attachment stable and positive emotional bond marked by caring, intimacy, supportiveness, and understanding Find it easy to get close to others No fear of abandonment or depending on others Avoidant Attachment Reflects a fear of intimacy and tendency to resist commitment to others Pulls back when things don’t go well in a relationship Suspicious, aloof, and skeptical about love Find it hard to completely trust and depend on others Get nervous when anyone gets too close emotionally Tend to avoid intimacy Ambivalent Attachment Mixed emotions about relationships Conflicting feelings of affection, anger, emotional turmoil, physical attraction, and doubt leave them in an unsettled, ambivalent state (whatever...)

Evolution and Mate Selection Evolutionary Psychology – study of the evolutionary origins of human behavior patters Imprint left on men and women that possibly influences concepts of sexual attraction to infidelity, jealousy and divorce Evolved behavior patterns intuitively guide partner choices

Why? – related to reproductive challenges faced by men and women Interested in casual sex Prefer more younger/physically attractive partners Display jealousy over real/imagined physical infidelity rather than emotional infidelity Women Prefer slightly older partners who appear industrious, higher status or economically successful More upset by emotional infidelities rather than physical Why? – related to reproductive challenges faced by men and women Women invest more time and energy into the reproductive process and nurturing Evolved an interest in whether partners would stick around and if they had the resources to provide for family Reproductive success for men depends wholly on the fertility of the woman Evolved an interest health, youth and beauty Trophy Wives?!

Trophy Wife – is it really a thing Trophy Wife – is it really a thing? Read and summarize the provided article.

“From a biological perspective, men do not benefit from investing resources in children they did not sire” This could be a possible reason men get more angered over physical, rather than emotional, cheating. Overall, potential mates are rated as attractive, by prospective partners, if they are kind, secure, intelligent and supportive. What does the concept of a trophy wife NOT take into account?

Trophy Wives Reading The idea of a trophy wife is an old-fashioned notion based on what? What are two mechanisms that explain the pairing process of people? What is “matching?” What is “exchange?” What does it mean that socioeconomic status and beauty are correlated? What have most studies ignored in understand the concept of trophy wives? What does gender-symmetric mean? Is there a modern slang term for this? Assuming that the importance of beauty and status is ______________ may cause researchers to overlook men’s _____________________ and women’s ______________ _______________ and thus to misidentify matching as exchange.

How has Trump promoted the idea of Evolutionary Psychology? Married three times, each to a younger woman Has five children, 3 from his first wife, and one each from his subsequent wives. (he is 72 and currently has a 12 year old son with) What about Bob Marley? https://www.thoughtco.com/how-many-children-did-bob-marley- have-4146517

Increasing Intimacy https://youtu.be/ONYlKmdylXg Your homework: Go home this weekend and find someone you have a strong interpersonal connection with. Stare into their eyes for 4 minutes without talking. Write one paragraph on how it felt and what you thought about while doing it and how you felt about the person after the 4 minutes.

Social Isolation Isolation - Mind Field (Ep 1) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqKdEhx-dD4