Promoting Positive Behavior Preparing to Parent Ms. Schneider

What’s the difference? DISCIPLINE PUNISHMENT

DISCIPLINE Guidance that helps children learn to behave appropriately. It involves teaching and promoting positive behavior and discouraging negative behavior.

PUNISHMENT Penalties for inappropriate behavior. Enforcing reasonable consequences for unacceptable behavior.

Negative feel DISCIPLINE More commonly used POSITIVE GUIDANCE  After all, the purpose of discipline is to guide children to behave properly.  When parents provide positive guidance, they give direction that encourages appropriate choices and behavior.

Goals to Positive Guidance The ultimate goal of positive guidance is SELF-DISCIPLINE. Self-discipline: the ability to manage their own behavior. Self-discipline develops gradually over time.

Over time children will… Develop self-confidence, self-esteem, and a healthy self-concept. Function independently in new situations. Get along with others and show consideration for others. Develop good character. Become socially responsible adults who make positive contributions to the world.

Parenting with Consistency Children need CONSISTENCY! Consistency: predictable patterns from those they look to for guidance. When parents enforce a rule some nights and not others, children become confused about what they are supposed to do.

Starting Young Positive guidance can and should begin in simple ways during infancy and continue through each stage of a child’s development. Parents who begin to shape their children’s behavior early are likely to have fewer problems and frustrations with their children later.

How to Provide Positive Guidance Set limits Communicate expectations Model appropriate behavior Positive Reinforcement

Setting Limits Limits: rules that define the boundary between acceptable and unacceptable behavior. When parents provide reasonable limits for children they teach children what is safe and acceptable for them to do.

EXAMPLE 5 year old Lauren is allowed to play in the swimming pool when a responsible adult is watching her. If no adult is present, she must stay out of the pool. This limit is will help keep her safe.

Setting Limits Keep limits reasonable Make sure limits have a teaching or guidance purpose Expand limits as children gain maturity Consider the individual child Make limits consistent Make limits specific

Your Turn Write a “limit” for 6 year old Jason and his bike.

Communicating Expectations Children can’t be expected to meet expectations that they haven’t been told about or don’t understand. Young children in particular need limits explained clearly and simply. Give children “do actions” and avoid the word don’t. Be sure to add please and thank you.

Modeling “Practice what you preach” is the key to successful modeling.

Positive Reinforcement Positive Reinforcement: a response to a desired behavior that makes the behavior likely to be repeated. Be specific Be sincere Be timely Be selective Avoid bribery

1.What is the difference between discipline and punishment? 2.What is the main goal of positive guidance? 3.What can happen when a parent is inconsistent? 4.Why are limits needed for children? 5.Write 5 positive “do action” statements.