1. Middle Childhood: Social & Moral Development

2. Terms to know  Middle Childhood: ages 7-12  Bullying: direct aggression or abuse toward another person, usually someone weaker. Can cause physical and emotional pain and scarring.  Peer pressure: a social group’s influence on the way individuals behave  Conformity: being like one another

3. Relationships with Peers  Between the ages of 7 and 12, a child’s world expands and changes in significant ways. Gradually, children become less influenced by their parents and more influenced by their peers. At the same time, they develop new kinds of relationships at home and school. They learn to stand up for themselves and take more responsibility for their decisions and actions.

4. Relationships with Peers  As children grow, friendships grow deeper – because they have a better sense of self and are better able to communicate their thoughts and feelings  Children look for these values in peer friendships:  Loyalty_____________  Trustworthiness______  _Kindness and Undestanding_____  __Fun_________________

5. What’s different now?  Children still enjoy active, physical play with friends but spend more time talking.  Children spend time together like afternoons and sleep-overs  Intellectual development allows deeper friendships  Now children can think abstractly and better understand how others see them  They are also more sensitive to what others think of them  Pre-teens are curious about the changes they are experiencing; talking with their friends helps them explore these issues in a “safe zone” they feel

6. What’s different, con’t?  Acceptance by peers is closely related to self esteem  “fitting in” builds confidence  Rejection can affect academic performance, social acceptance, and family relationships  Adults can help them gain peer acceptance by teaching social skills and encouraging activities with groups.  Rejection may call for professional counseling if have had a severe impact on child

7. Making Friends  Young children generally play with other children of the same gender  As they grow older, children enjoy company of both genders  Pre-teens begin interests and attraction to opposite genders  Most 11-12 year olds are not ready for relationships steps but are already very curious and want to know what it would be like  As a parent, make sure children have healthy relationships with both genders and that you as a parent know what the other child and their families are like. Pre-teens are very impressionable by peers.

8. How to resolve conflicts with peers  Set some ground rules  Listen to both sides  Find common ground  Reach a solution that is acceptable to both sides

9. How to deal with middle childhood age children  Allow choices  Make punishments equal to offense  Still offer warnings  Listen to the whole story  Talk about wrong-doing and why  Allow for independence  Do not humiliate in front of others  Be consistent with guidance and punishment

10. Moral Development  Set a good example  Support the child’s growing conscience  Talk about how to handle situations BEFORE they occur  Reinforce empathy  Use the child’s sense of fairness

11. Peer Pressure  Becomes very strong at this age  Desire to be accepted may take over a child’s choice of words, dress, behaviors, habits, and likes and dislikes  Conformity is desired  Peer pressure is very powerful  The urge to go along with dishonest and unethical behavior can be very strong  How to help:  Join a peer group that shows positive values  Find others with similar interests and hobbies  Rely upon your conscience  Try not to appear to be upset when teased  Talk about problems with trusted adults and parents

12. Taking Responsibility  Teach responsibility  They need safe opportunities to explore and test  Realize most of the time they just want to “have fun”  Allow them to make low-risk decisions  Give a job and leave to do it  Encourage to think about consequences  Reflect of past poor decisions but do not “hang over their head” and nag constantly  Allow for natural consequences as much as possible  Negotiate rules and responsibilities  Stick to rules and hold consistently