C N H | K E Y C L U B CNH | Created CNH Administration California-Nevada-Hawaii District August 2013 Presented by Victoria Lai, Governor Lisa Lotito-Byers, Administrator Dealing with… Difficult People

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Hostile-Aggressives Complainers Silent & Unresponsives Super-Agreeables Negativists Know-It-All Experts Indecisives Disruptive / Frustrating Behaviors

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District move forward Enables YOU and Difficult Person to move forward Interferes with “successful” functioning of difficult behavior Act with purpose to balance power Coping Skills

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Don’t get dragged down “Misery loves company” Be aware and keep your guard up! Listen Tempting but will not stop them Tips

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Use a time limit for venting 5 minute rule Perpetual pessimist vs. occasional vent Don’t Agree Tempting to appease  don’t Adds fuel to the flames

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Don’t stay silent Silence = Agreement Do switch extremes into facts Negative people often speak in extreme terms  switch them to fact-based statements Sometimes ≠ always

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Move to problem solving People who whine often feel powerless & that situation is hopeless End their negativity… help them move into problem solving mode

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Cut them off Hopelessly negative people need to be cut off CAUTION Make sure they aren’t just venting over the limit Make sure you weren’t encouraging them Make sure they can’t be switched to problem solving Politely shut them down

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District 1.Hurting ourselves 2.It’s not about you; it’s about them 3.Battle of the EGO 4.Anger feeds anger; negativity feeds negativity 5.Waste of energy 6.Negativity spreads 7.Freedom of speech Why bother controlling our responses?

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Let’s share our strategies!

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District More Tips…

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District 1.Be calm 2.Understand the person’s intention 3.Get some perspective from others 4.Let the person know where you are coming from 5.Build a rapport 6.Treat the person with respect 7.Focus on what can be actioned upon 8.Ignore 9.Escalate to a higher authority for resolution 9 more tips

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District 1.Forgive 2.Wait it out 3.Does it really matter if I am right? 4.Don’t respond 5.Stop talking about it 6.Be in their shoes 7.Look for the lessons and 15 more tips

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District 8.Choose to eliminate negative people in your life 9.Become the observer 10.Go for the run 11.Consider the worst case scenario 12.Avoid heated discussions 13.Most important 14.Pour honey to counter the poison 15.Express it and 15 more tips

CNH | Training Topic: Dealing with Difficult People CNH Key Club District Go for the GOLD Questions? Further Questions: please contact Victoria Lai Lisa Lotito-Byers