Essentials of Human Communication, 7th Edition Joseph A. DeVito Hunter College of the City University of New York Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Chapter Four: Verbal Messages This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law: - any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network; - preparation of any derivative work, including the extraction, in whole or in part, of any images; - any rental, lease, or lending of the program. Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved. Chapter Four Goals Learn the nature and principles of verbal messages Learn to use verbal messages more effectively Learn to avoid sexist, heterosexist, racist and ageist language Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Six Principles of Verbal Messages Message meaning are in people. Messages are denotative and connotative. Messages vary in abstraction. Messages vary in politeness. Message vary in assertiveness. Messages are influenced by culture and gender. Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Messages are Influenced by Culture and Gender Messages are culturally influenced The principle of cooperation The principle of peaceful relations The principle of self-denigration The principle of directness Gender Verbal messages reflect considerable gender influences Example: Politeness Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Disconfirmation and Confirmation A communication pattern in which one ignores the other person’s presence and communication Confirmation A communication pattern in which one acknowledges the other person’s presence and attends to his/her communication Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Disconfirmation and Confirmation cont… Acknowledge presence and contribution of other Make nonverbal contact Demonstrate understanding of words and feelings Ask questions Encourage the other person to express thoughts and feelings Disconfirmation Ignore presence and indifferent to messages Make no nonverbal contact Jump to interpret and evaluate messages Talk about self Interrupt; make it hard for other’s expression Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Skill Development Experience Carrie’s boyfriend of seven years left her and married another woman. Carrie confides this to Samantha. What would she say if responding with disconfirmation? with rejection? with confirmation? From Skill Development Experience Feature: Confirming, Rejecting, and Disconfirming – ask students to offer an example each response. Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved. Racist Speech Classifying others in an inferior position Makes dominant group more powerful Inherently racist language—“white” Commonly called “cultural identifiers” (i.e., descriptions like old, black, Jew, queer) Learn to use appropriate identifiers Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved. Heterosexist Speech “derogatory language used against gays or lesbians” Avoid offensive parodies and nonverbal mannerisms Avoid “complimenting” gay men and lesbians that they “don’t look it” Avoid assumptions about their relational knowledge of other people “like them” Affirm them as individuals Stay clear of making overattributions Remember and celebrate relationship milestones Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Ageist and Sexist Speech Prejudice against other age groups General disrespect for older people Age restrictions in certain occupations Sexist Generic “man” Generic “he” and “his” Sex role stereotyping Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved. Cultural Identifiers Race and nationality Affectional orientation Age Sex Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Principles for Using Verbal Messages Effectively Avoid intensional orientation Avoid allness Distinguish between facts and inferences Avoid indiscrimination Avoid polarization Avoid static evaluation Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Extensionalize: Avoid Intensional Orientation Intensional Orientation: Viewing people, objects, or events in the way they are talked about or pre-labeled Extensional Orientation: Look first at the actual people, objects, or events and then apply labels Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

See the Individual: Avoid Allness Allness thinking—putting into “all” or “never” categories Recognize that there is always more to learn about something Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Differences between Factual and Inferential Statements From Table 4.3 Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Avoid Indiscrimination Indiscrimination: Failure to distinguish between similar but different people Solution: See the individual apart from the group Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved. Avoid Polarization Polarization: Tendency to see the world in opposite extremes Solution: Search for the middle ground Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.

Avoid Static Evaluation Static Evaluation: When you hold on to judgments about people and ignore they’ve changed Solution: Look at statements in context of time Copyright ©2011, 2008, 2005 Pearson Education, Inc. All rights reserved.