Interdependence and Equity

 The previous chapter (09) focused primarily on strategies used to keep relationships: ◦1.Satisfying and in good “working condition” ◦2. At a desired level (e.g., anti-social maintenance strategies; rules for friends with benefits)  This chapter extends satisfaction into a broader model of maintenance focused on keeping the relationship in existence.

 Relational partners become interdependent through communication and the exchange of resources.  People are motivated to be in relationships that provide them with high levels of rewards and low levels of costs.

 Rewards are positive consequences of being in a relationship Emotional: positive affect when with partner (love, warmth, gratitude, etc.) Social: activities, meeting other people Instrumental: partner helps accomplish tasks Opportunity: relationship allows you to do something you couldn’t do otherwise

 Costs are the negative consequences of being in a relationship Emotional : negative affect with partner Social: having to do undesired activities/interact with partner’s friends Instrumental: partner prevents tasks from being accomplished or creates more work Opportunity: life experiences given up for the sake of the relationship

 The outcome refers to the overall level of “profit” or “deficit” in relationships  rewards – costs = outcome  Relationships are generally rewarding when outcomes are positive, and generally costly when outcomes are negative

 Comparison level (CL) : “standard” by which people evaluate their relationships ◦how rewarding or costly you expect your relationship to be  based on prior experience, family model, friends, media, etc.  Outcome - CL= Satisfaction When outcome meets or exceeds the CL, people are satisfied. When the outcome falls under the CL, people are dissatisfied.

 Comparison Level for Alternatives (CL Alt ) ◦Perceptions that a better alternative to the relationship exists (another partner, being single, etc.) ◦Book calls it “quality of alternatives” for some reason—use CLAlt ◦Poor alternatives are related to more commitment ◦Good alternatives are related to less commitment

Alternatives Poor Good Current Relationship Meets or Exceeds CL Fails to Meet CL Satisfied and Committed Satisfied but Uncommitted Dissatisfied but Committed Dissatisfied and Uncommitted

 Extension of interdependence theory  Investments—Resources attached to relationship that would decline in value or be lost if relationship were to end. ◦Intrinsic investments: resources put directly into the relationship (time, money, effort) Extrinsic investments: resources developed over time as a result of being in the relationship (possessions, social networks, children)

Active Exit Voice Destructive Constructive Neglect Loyalty Passive

Costs CL Satisfaction Investment CL Alt Commitment Stability Rewards

Costs CL Satisfaction Investments CL-Alt Commit. Benign Attribs. & Emots. Accomm. Behavior Decision to remain Accommodate partner (Not retaliate) Derogation of alternatives Willingness to sacrifice Perc. rel. superiority Stable

 Is distribution of resources fair for both partners?  Based on the ratio of benefits vs. contributions  e.g., ◦Kenbenefits (20) : contributions (20) ◦Kirsten benefits (20) : contributions (10) ◦Ken is underbenefitted ◦Kirsten is overbenefitted

 General Equity (overall balance) versus  Specific Equity (balance in a particular domain)

 Equity ≠ Equality  Cultural Differences in standards of fairness ◦e.g., North America vs. Asia

 More satisfaction & commitment  More relational maintenance behaviors ◦Positivity ◦Openness ◦Assurances  Negative emotions (anger, guilt, sadness) expressed in more constructive manner

 Distress, anger, sadness  Feeling “cheated”; unfair  Decreased relational satisfaction  Less prosocial communication (both partners) ◦Less relational maintenance behaviors  Less positivity  Fewer assurances  Fewer shared tasks ◦Less comforting

 Guilt (but not always)  Sometimes feel smothered by partner  May try to increase partner rewards  Feel less need to employ relational maintenance behaviors

 Restoring actual equity  Adjusting psychological equity  Leaving the relationship

 Which is more important? ◦Equity or ◦Reward/Cost Ratio

 Women routinely underbenefitted in heterosexual relationships  Men in dual-career couples only spend 4 minutes a day more on chores than those in traditional single-income marriages  Women do not perceive imbalance unfair until it exceeds 2/3 of the work  Unlike heterosexuals, gay and lesbian partners share tasks roughly equally