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Chapter Eleven: Interpersonal Relationships: Growth and Deterioration

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1 Chapter Eleven: Interpersonal Relationships: Growth and Deterioration
The Interpersonal Communication Book 11th Ed. Joseph A. DeVito Chapter Eleven: Interpersonal Relationships: Growth and Deterioration This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law: any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network; preparation of any derivative work, including the extraction, in whole or in part, of any images; any rental, lease, or lending of the program.

2 After all, my erstwhile dear, My no longer cherished.
Need we say it was not love, Just because it perished? Edna St. Vincent Millay Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

3 RELATIONSHIP DEVELOPTMENT
Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

4 Relationship Development
Uncertainty Reduction Theory Social Penetration Theory Relationship Dialectics Theory Rules Theory Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

5 Attraction theory Developt relationships with those who are similar to you, who are physically close to you, who offer you reinforcement,whom you consider attractive physically and in personality, and who are of a desired socioeconomic and educational level Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

6 Attraction Theory Attractiveness Proximity Similarity Appearance
Personality Proximity Similarity Matching Hypothesis Complementarity Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

7 Affinity-Seeking Strategies
Be of Help to Others Appear In Control Present Self as Socially Equal Present Self as Comfortable with Other Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

8 Affinity-Seeking Strategies (continued)
Allow Other Some Control Follow Cultural Rules Appear Active, Enthusiastic, Dynamic Stimulate and Encourage Other To Talk Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

9 Affinity-Seeking Strategies (continued)
Engage In Self-Disclosure Appear Optimistic Appear to Other as Independent Etc. Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

10 Social Exchange Theory
Profits Rewards Costs Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

11 Social Exchange Theory
You develop relationships that will enable you to maximize your profit (Thibaut & Kelley,1986) A theory based on an economic model of profits and losses and begin with the following equation: Profits = Reward – Costs. Enter & maintain relationships in which the rewards are greater than the cost. When the costs become greater than the rewards, the reason deteriorates Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

12 Rewards: anything that you wuld incur costs to obtain
Types of rewards in a love relationships: money, status, love,information,goods (Baron & Byrne,1984) Cost: things that you normally try to avoid,that you consider unpleasant or difficult Profit: what results when the costs are subtracted from rewards. Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

13 Comparison Levels Expectations for Profits in Relationship
Comparison Level for Alternatives Profits from Another Relationship Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

14 Equity Theory Ratio of Rewards and Costs Equal to Partner’s
Underbenefited, Less Likely to Succeed Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

15 Equity theory Develop and maintain relationships in which your ratio of rewards compared to cost is approximately equal to your partner’s Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

16 Equity Theory (continued)
Relationship Satisfaction and Equity Equity, Culture, and Gender Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

17 RELATIONSHIPS MAINTENANCE
Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

18 Relationship Maintenance Behaviors
To Keep the Relationship Intact To Keep the Relationship at its Present Stage To Keep the Relationship Satisfying Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

19 Reasons For Relationship Maintenance
Emotional Attachment Convenience Children Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

20 Reasons For Relationship Maintenance (continued)
Fear Inertia Commitment Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

21 Rules for Maintaining Relationships
Friendship Rules Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

22 Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

23 Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

24 Rules for Maintaining Relationships
Friendship Rules Romantic Rules Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

25 Communication for Maintaining Relationships
Be Nice : polite,cheerfull,friendly,avoid critism,compromise, self -sacrifice Communicate: talking about the honesty,& opennes in relationships, talking about shared feelings Be Open: direct discussion & listen to the other Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

26 Communication for Maintaining Relationships (continued)
Give Assurances: assure the other person of the significance of the relationship. Share Joint Activities: spend time with the other Be Positive: try to make interactions pleasant and upbeat Focus on Improving Yourself Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

27 RELATIONSHIPS DETERIORATION
Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

28 Causes Relationship Deterioration
Beliefs about Relationships Excessive Intimacy Claims Third-Party Relationships Relationship Change Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

29 Relationship Deterioration (continued)
Undefined Expectations Sex-Related Problems Work-Related Problems Financial Difficulties Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

30 Effects of Relationship Deterioration
Loss of Benefits or Rewards Loss of Self-Esteem Financial Implications Not all Breakups are Bad Microsoft Image Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

31 Communication in Relationship Deterioration
Withdrawal Decline in Self-Disclosure Deception Positive and Negative Messages Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

32 Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

33 RELATIONSHIPS REPAIR Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

34 Relationship Repair Interpersonal Repair Recognize the Problem
Engage In Productive Communication and Conflict Resolution Pose Possible Solutions Affirm Each Other Integrate Solutions into Normal Behavior Risk Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

35 Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

36 Intrapersonal Repair Recognize Communication is Circular
Realize the Interactions are Punctuated Stimulation and Response Can Break Unproductive Circle Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

37 Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

38 Strategies for Disengagement
Use Positive Tone to Preserve Relationship Negative Identity Management Justification for Breakup Behavioral De-escalation De-escalate to Reduce Exclusivity Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

39 Dealing with a Breakup Break the Loneliness-Depression Cycle
Take Time Out Bolster Self-Esteem Remove or Avoid Uncomfortable Symbols Seek Support Avoid Repeating Negative Patterns Copyright © Allyn & Bacon 2007

40 Interpersonal Communication
The Interpersonal Communication Book 11th Ed.


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