THE MATING GAME What is important to us as individuals?

The Search for the Self Adolescent/Teen stage:  Sort out values and decide what is important to you  Establish personal norms  Set priorities for present and future  Anticipatory socialization- learning the rights, obligations, and expectations of a role to prepare for assuming that role in the future.

Dating and Mating Which time periods?  Similar social rank?  Similar interests?  Similar values?  Homogamy- the tendency of individuals to marry people who have social characteristics similar to their own Are these things we still value? How has homogamy become redefined?

Answer This…  Think about your expectations of what your family will be like.  What are the plans that you have for the future? …but you don’t know who you will fall in love with. What if it is someone unexpected?

This is Your Soulmate.  Suppose that within five years you will fall in love with this person and then think about the following questions:  How will those plans be affected by this selection?  What will your family think?  Given that this person will be your mate, how do you see your plans for the future?  Where will you live?  What about kids?  What is the likelihood that you would actually consider marrying this person?  How is the selection of a mate altered or created by our life experiences, culture, and/or socializations?

The Initial Question  We don’t think that details matter.  We assume that this is normal/obvious to others.  Why?  What changed about our understanding of what is valuable to us?

Homogamy Changes How has homogamy become redefined? Cultural Norm: Monogamy, Heterosexuality, Homogamy  Homosexuality  Polygamy  Across race  Across countries  Across cultures