1. Mate Selection

2. Most people of the world marry
About 3% of US population never marries
U.S Census 1999

3. Social pressures to marry
Legitimacy of children/relationship
Property
Stigmas against singlehood
Need for intimacy
Division of our world into public and private spheres because of industrialization

4. Who We Date

5. Dating in the Past 19th Century 1920 1950’s until 1970’s
couples get to know each other at parents’ home (for marriage)
1920
courting with adult supervision begins (for marriage)
1950’s until 1970’s
traditional dating & going steady (for fun &/or marriage)

6. Contemporary dating Casual dating Pack dating
Serious dating (for marriage)
Personal ads
Mail-order brides
Internet
Marriage bureaus (match makers)
Dinner dates
Proms and homecoming

7. How We Meet 66% of married couples introduced by someone they knew
32% introduced themselves

8. The more we change the more we stay the same….
Heterosexual dating behavior is very gendered (traditional)
Nontraditional dating behavior can create confusion

9. There are many fish in the sea, but most of us choose to stay in our own pond. Demmitt
Homogamy
marriage btw. people w/ similar characteristics

10. Social class & Dating Upper Class Middle Class Lower-Class
Most homogamy
Parental control through exclusive neighborhoods, private schools, country clubs, etc.
Middle Class
More freedom from parents but less than lower class
More likely to meet at school & church, parents more likely to move away from “undesirables”
Lower-Class
Least likely to use structured activities for the encounters

11. Race & Ethnicity Education & Religion
Multicultural love is more color-blind than marriage
 Education & Religion

12. Marriage btw. 2 people w/ dissimilar backgrounds.
Heterogamy
Marriage btw. 2 people w/ dissimilar backgrounds.

13. Dating desirability level and the principle of least interest
Individuals tend to date within their dating desirability level.
The person with the least interest in continuing the relationship has the power to control it.
The high-status person has less to lose by discontinuing the relationship and can make excessive demands on the lower status partner.
Baca Zinn & Eitzen, 2002

14. Hypogamy Hypergamy woman marries man of lower status
woman marries man of higher status
Occurs more frequently in patriarchal societies where women are evaluated in terms of their husband’s social status rather than their own.
Therefore, women gain and men do not lose.

15. What we want in our partner’s

16. Buss 1990 10,000 people in 37 cultures were interviewed All wanted
Love
Dependability
Emotional stability
Maturity
Kindness
Understanding

17. Buss 1990 Men want Women want Physically attractive females
Ambitious & industriousness males

18. Mate selection around the world
Dowries
Transfer of goods/money from bride’s family to grooms
Bride price
Gift given by the groom to bride’s family
Arranged marriages