Understanding, Appreciating, and Learning to be Purposeful with Our Sexuality. Trinity Fellowship Church – Spring 2015

 1st – Introduction and Defining Sexuality  2nd – Theology of Sexuality  3rd – Maleness and Femaleness  4th – Celebrating Sexuality with Boundaries

 Students ask parents - Is your tendency to first attempt to change your behavior, your heart, or your relationship with God? - What shaped your theology of sexuality growing up? - How has your theology of sexuality changed as you have gotten older? - What are your plans to help develop child’s theology of sexuality?  Parents ask student - What has most influenced your view of sexuality so far in your life? - How have I shaped your view of sexuality, positively and negatively? - How can I help you develop your theology of sexuality?

 There is no difference between guys and girls except that which is socially and culturally constructed.  Guys and girls are so different that they can never understand each other.  Guys cannot be feminine nor girls masculine.  I must look or act like _____ to be a normal guy or girl.

 Discussing genders as a whole means using generalities. Every description will not fit every person, but in general, men will have a greater mix of masculine traits and women will have a greater mix of feminine traits.  Some of these differences are more flexible through childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood.

 Men and women are more alike than they are different  The ways we attract and complement give us unique insight into our Creator  Each man and woman possesses some traits that are both masculine and feminine  Differences have nothing to do with status, equality, or worth.

Men are like chests of drawers, with separate compartments for everything and nothing very self- disclosing on top.

Qualities of masculinity: - Significance (affirmation, admiration, and respect) - Strength (fortress that protects and defends) - Safety (a retreat to relax and regroup) - Simplicity (less complex, able to compartmentalize)

- Emotionally even: The blessing and curse of a narrower range of feelings. - Bonding through activity: Sports, projects, hikes, and other recreation can help create a context to practice intimacy skills.

- Strong fortress: Inner steadiness and drive to protect - Sexually assertive: Men have more testosterone and typically tune in visually and respond more quickly to stimulation. They also are more likely to seek to meet intimacy needs through initiating erotic behaviors

 How does this change how we view our brothers, fathers, and/or sons?  How does this understanding help us appreciate the way guys are created?

Women are like armoires. Throw open the doors and everything is visible. It has no compartments and everything is openly interactive yet everything has a secure place to rest.

Qualities of femininity - Special (distinctive and unique) - Sensitive(people, thoughts, and emotions) - Secure (nurturing and feel safe & protected) - Surprising (elaborate and complex)

- Beautiful and Powerful: God gave women allure that draws others (especially men) into achieving levels of emotional intimacy they might not reach otherwise. - Maternally Nurturing: Fostering and preserving life for those around her.

- Emotionally Variable: Emotional variability is bigger than hormonal fluctuations. Women experience and take pleasure in a wider range of emotions. Their brains tune in to feelings better. - Sexually Responsive: Women tend to think about erotic sexuality less than men, however they can respond enthusiastically when pursued.

 How does this change how we view our sisters, mothers, and/or daughters?  How does this understanding help us appreciate the way girls are created?

 Last week, multiple students indicated that males were more important than females. Where was this learned, and why is it wrong according to this class?  What is one thing you learned today about your own gender?  How should this information affect your relationships?