Background The value and importance adolescent girls place on their friendships has been well documented as has the prevalence of indirect aggression in their tightly structured friendship groups. Indirect aggression seriously damages a girl’s sense of well being and often leaves friendship groups fractured and dysfunctional. Seeking solutions is not easy. Competent girls have a range of strategies for managing conflict within their friendship groups however, this is not the case for vulnerable girls who are highly susceptible to the damaging behaviours. This intervention study highlights a number of strategies used by competent girls to address conflict issues within their friendship groups while also exposing the limitations of vulnerable adolescent girls to manage their friendships. Research Design Using a Narrative perspective, and a Participatory Action Research approach, seventy five, 14 year old adolescent girls in large and small groups engaged in several interactive focus group sessions. Initial discussions focused on the girls’ understanding of conflict within their peer group. A cyclical process of interviews, discussions and data analysis saw the refinement of the girls’ knowledge for managing peer relationships. Results: Identifying the social problems – three main areas of concern The problems in groups when the group has a dominant leader Girls’ concerns over the power of non-verbal communication (“the evil eye” the “cold shoulder”) – exclusion and intimidation Girl’s lack of confidence and their inability to have a voice and speak up for themselves “Throughout generations, girls have been bullied…. Girls build a replica of the very same power structures from which they are excluded in the larger social order. Within the culture of girl-to-girl bullying they learn about competition, unequal self worth and psychological warfare. They also learn that covert relational aggression is a viable and useful strategy to take with them into the adult world.” SooHoo, S. (2009) Examining the visibility of Girl-to-Girl bullying in Schools: A call to Action. International Electronic journal for Leadership in Learning Vol.13 (6) Social skills for vulnerable girls includes: Learning problem solving skills (Girls use wishful thinking as a nonproductive coping strategy – hoping the problem will resolve itself without them having to do anything)) Learning to contain their emotions Learning appropriate language skills to express and discuss their concerns Learning to have the confidence to have a voice for themselves (Girls found it easier to remain silent rather than speak up and voice their opinions because of their fear of the consequences – and silence added to their vulnerability.) Discussion Competent girls coping strategies indicated that they were fare less dependent on group approval and far less likely to accept negative group behaviours. Competent girls generated a list of strategies to assist vulnerable girls to challenge negative and unhealthy practices within their friendship groups including: Having a wide circle of friends as this protects you if you are excluded from the group as you have other girls to be friends with Being careful of the group you choose to be in – if you are dealing with group conflict in many different ways, get out of the group Know what is right and what is wrong - Decide what is important and what is not – what you will take a stand for and what you will let go Walk away from conflict – do not stay and be humiliated. Remove yourself from gossip, bitchiness and backstabbing – this applies to MySpace, Face book etc. If you are not involved you can’t be accused of anything Be clear where your limits and boundaries are – do not let the peer group make decisions for you as this may become very difficult for you Find friends who are mostly like you and don’t ‘do drugs’ or drink Ignore the ‘evil eye’ daggers and the cold shoulder. This is immature behaviour – don’t do to others what has been done to you Think in advance of how to manage situations that may become difficult for you and have a plan worked out, so that if you don’t feel comfortable about a situation you can always say your parents will not allow you to go – Parents authority over rules group authority Seek support when required – from the school counsellor, parents, a trusted friend Noakes and Rinaldi (2006) stated that girls have the ability to use “higher-level solutions” to negotiate their way through the complexities of their friendship groups and in this study, it was evident that many girls presented a maturity of thinking and understanding along with highly developed coping strategies thus enabling them to produce “higher-level solutions” when managing indirect aggression in friendship groups..Huntley J.A. & Owens L.D. (2012) Collaborative Conversations: Adolescent girls own strategies for managing conflict in their friendship groups. International Journal of Youth and Adolescence, Taylor and Francis, London.