THE SACRAMENT OF MATRIMONY St. Mary’s RCIA

What is the plan of God regarding man and woman? Matthew 19:6 and Genesis 1:28 Compendium Catechism of the Catholic Church Page 95

For what ends has God instituted Matrimony? “The marital union of man and woman, which is founded with its own proper laws by the Creator, is by its very nature ordered to the communion and good of the couple and to the generation and education of the children.” Compendium Catechism of the Catholic Church Page 96 “According to the original divine plan this conjugal union is indissoluble, as Jesus Christ affirmed.” Mark 10:9

How does sin threaten marriage? “Because of original sin, which caused a rupture in the God-given communion between man and woman, the union of marriage is often threatened by discord and infidelity.” Compendium Catechism of the Catholic Church Page 96 “However, God in his infinite mercy gives to man and woman the grace to bring the union of their lives into accord with the original divine plan.”

What new element did Christ give Matrimony? “Christ not only restored the original order of matrimony but raised it to the dignity of a sacrament, giving spouses a special grace to live out their marriage as a symbol of Christ’s love for his bride the Church.” Compendium Catechism of the Catholic Church Page 96 Ephesians 5:25

John 2:1-11:

Each stone jars, can approximately contain 20 gallons of water. So, its about 120 gallons of water (~450 liters). How much wine?

The Catholic Church distinguishes between legal marriage and the Sacrament of Matrimony Being married civilly doesn’t necessarily mean that the two people participated in the sacrament of Matrimony.

A Catholic marriage involves two baptized people, one or both of whom are Catholic.

The union of a couple in a Catholic marriage is not the just the occasion for a good party. Catholic marriage is a vocation, a calling from God, from the Latin vocare meaning to call. Just as priests, deacons, religious sisters and brother, nuns and monks have a calling from God, so do married people, as well as unmarried people.

Being a good husband or wife –then a good father or mother –is as much a sacred calling from God as the call to enter a convent and become a Poor Clare, Dominican, or Carmelite nun. Married people are to be sanctified as much as clergy and religious brothers and sisters.

Because marriage is a vocation and a sacrament, marriage imparts a special grace that gives the recipients the strength and ability to assume and fulfill all the duties and responsibilities of Christian marriage. The participants must enter the Sacrament of Matrimony with the intention that their union will be: Permanent: Unto death Faithful: No adultery Fruitful: Open to the possibility of children if God wills it.

The Sacrament of Matrimony must give to the bride and groom the necessary graces to bring those vows to fruition. How to get married in the Catholic Church? At least one person must be Catholic, but the other person can be any religion. If the non-Catholic was baptized in a non-Catholic Church, documentation to verify the Baptism must be provided. If the non-Catholic is unbaptized, unchurched, or of a non-Christian religion, special dispensation from the local bishop is needed. The priest or deacon doing the ceremony can obtain it.

A Valid Sacrament of Matrimony Requires a priest or deacon A bride and groom (no same sex marriages) Two witnesses (any religion)

Wedding banquets and receptions Are not required! The celebration and expense is up to the bride and groom $$$

Just before the formal vows, the priest or deacon asks the couple three important questions: 1.Have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage? 2.Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives? 3.Will you accept children lovingly from God and bring them up according to the law of Christ and the Church?

Marriage Vows I, Renae, take you Shane, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and bad, in sickness and in health. I will love and honor you all the days of my life I, Shane, take you Renae, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and bad, in sickness and in health. I will love and honor you all the days of my life

After the vows, the rings are blessed. The groom places one ring on the bride’s finger and says: “Take this ring as a sign of my love and my fidelity, in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.” The bride takes the other ring and places it on the groom’s finger and says the same words.

Annulment Like Baptism, Confirmation and Holy Orders, Matrimony only takes place once between the same two people. Catholics can only marry someone who is widowed or wasn’t married before. If a person is previously married and the spouse is alive, it must be demonstrated that the marriage was invalid, so the previous union can be declared null and void through annulment. Then the person is free to marry someone else. How can this be demonstrated? If one or both spouses didn’t intend to enter a permanent, faithful, and/or fruitful union, that deficiency renders the marriage invalid.

Annulment Church annulments are not a form of divorce and have no affect whatsoever on the legitimacy of children because that’s a purely legal matter. Annulments don’t make children born of that union illegitimate. Annulments declare that a marriage was never a valid sacrament in the first place even if both parties entered into it with good faith intentions.

Annulment How much does an annulment cost? Fees associated with the annulment process vary within the U.S. Most tribunals charge between $200-$1000 for a standard nullity case. Fees are typically payable over time, and may be reduced or eliminated in cases of financial difficulty. Other expenses may incurred when consultation with medical, psychological, or other experts is needed. How long does it take to get an annulment? It usually takes 12 to 18 months.

Convalidation A convalidation ceremony is needed when a Catholic couple gets married in a civil or non-Catholic ceremony, which makes it an invalid marriage in the eyes of the Church. Even if only one of them is Catholic, it’s and invalid sacrament, because Catholics must always follow Church law. If two baptized but non-Catholic Christians get married, however, in a civil ceremony or any religious denomination, the Catholic Church does recognize that as being a valid marriage as long as it is the first marriage for both of them. If a couple marries in haste but later realizes that, yes, they will remain together, the couple can have the union recognized by God and the Church through convalidation.

Cohabitation The Church teaching on cohabitation reflects its belief about the dignity of marriage. “Marital love is an image of God’s love for humanity” (CCC#1604) and “Christian marriage is a sign of Christ’s union with the Church” (CCC #1617). “This union can never be temporary or a ‘trial’.” (USCCB, Why Isn’t It Good to Live Together Before Marriage?) Among young people, there is a belief that cohabitation is a good preparation for marriage, like a trial run. There is no available data to support this conviction and even indicate that those who cohabit before marriage may be likely to divorce later. (USCCB, Six Important Trends in Marriage and Family Life)

Three Important Points If a Catholic gets married by a Justice of the Peace, a captain on a ship, a mayor, or a Protestant minister, and hasn’t obtained a dispensation from the local Catholic bishop, then the marriage is invalid, and the Catholic is not allowed to receive Holy Communion until that union is sanctioned by the Church in a convalidation. If a Catholic has been previously married and or marries someone who has been married previously outside of the Church, the Catholic is not allowed to receive Holy Communion until the they are free to marry through annulment or lack of form. If a couple cohabitates (lives together), it is the hope of the Church that they will marry. The couple cannot receive the sacraments until they show that they intend to marry (set a date). They are not allowed to continue receiving the sacraments until they marry or they refrain from sexual intercourse.

The Sixth and Ninth Commandments: Honor Human Sexuality The Sixth Commandment is “Thou shalt not commit adultry” and the Ninth is “Though shalt not covet they neighbor’s wife.” Both deal with honoring human sexuality. The Sixth Commandment forbids the actual, physical act of having immoral sexual activity, specifically adultery, which is sex with someone else’s spouse or a spouse cheating on their partner. The Sixth Commandment also includes fornication, which is sex between unmarried people, prostitution, pornography, homosexual activity, masturbation, group sex, rape, incest, pedophilia, bestiality, and necrophilia. X X

The Sixth and Ninth Commandments: Honor Human Sexuality The Ninth Commandment forbids the intentional desire and longing for immoral sexuality. To sin in the heart, Jesus says, is to lust after a woman or man in your heart with the desire and will to have immoral sex with them. Committing the act of sex outside of marriage is sinful and wanting to do it is immoral as well, just as to hate your neighbor is like killing him in your heart. Just a human life is a gift from God and needs to be respected, defended and protected, so, too is human sexuality. Catholicism regards sexuality as a divine gift, so it’s considered sacred in the proper context of marriage. Matt 5:27-28

The Sixth and Ninth Commandments: Honor Human Sexuality The Ninth Commandment forbids the intentional desire and longing for immoral sexuality. To sin in the heart, Jesus says, is to lust after a woman or man in your heart with the desire and will to have immoral sex with them. Committing the act of sex outside of marriage is sinful and wanting to do it is immoral as well, just as to hate your neighbor is like killing him in your heart. Just a human life is a gift from God and needs to be respected, defended and protected, so, too is human sexuality. Catholicism regards sexuality as a divine gift, so it’s considered sacred in the proper context of marriage.

RCIA Group Wedding with Father Vaughn March 31, 2012 The time will be announced!