Berhanu Nigussie (Asst. Prof.) Review Responsive and Positive Parenting during Childhood: Proven Techniques for Our Children’s Bright Future.     Berhanu Nigussie (Asst. Prof.) Feb. 2015 JU

Review Research Questions: Which parenting style could benefit children How parents need to support their children’s Independence & Assertiveness? What influences the way we parent our children? What is the most important gift a parent can give to one’s children?

Methods To address the review, the reviewer reviewed related literature and reflected his professional view. He investigated internationally & nationally published literature related to parenting. He has also made his own professional reflection on the issue.

The Four Major Parenting Styles Authoritarian: rigid, controlling, punitive, demanding, unreasonable-expectation, little affection, encouragement and praise... Authoritative: democratic, affectionate, reasonable- expectations, appropriate responsibilities, mutual respect, healthy role modeling, encourages independence & firm guidelines… Permissive: few expectations, few demands, few rules, inconsistent, high level of nurturing, parent avoids control, behaves as a friend, easily frustrated… Uninvolved: Parents don’t care about the day-to-day activities & overall wellbeing of their children

1. Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian: Negative Consequences Rebellious or submissive Distrustful Manipulative Power struggles with parents Difficulty making decisions Only follows rules when parent is present

Negative Consequences… Poor social skills Low self-confidence & esteem Always struggles to satisfy parents Leads depressive & stressful life Poor academic performance

2. Authoritative Parenting

Authoritative: Positive Consequences Optimum self-confidence & esteem Assertive, honest, trustworthy Respectful to self & others Responsible, law abiding Ethical & disciplined Intrinsically motivated Good relationship with parents Healthy, drug free & has good social skills Has self-control, happy & well-adjusted Excellent academic performances & successful in life

3. Permissive Parenting

Permissive Parenting Friends to their child Instead of giving their children time & attention, they overwhelm them with gifts Shows their children inconsistent behavior Over-indulge their children Offering whatever a child requests without questioning They do all these to compensate the way they were parented የዝህ ሁሉ ድርጊታቸው፡ ምክንያት ደግሞ እነሱ ያሳለፉት የልጅነት ዘመን በልጆቻቸው ፡ ላይ እንዳይደገም ነው

Impacts of such parenting on the Children:

Thinking that they are always the boss-no one else Immaturity in all aspects (including social skills) Emotional: lack self-control Not knowing the limits of things Not respecting the respectable: with age, status… Perceiving that this word is free of problems & full of happiness Inability to take responsibility Not following rules & regulations Not visualizing the consequences of things Low motivation & poor academic achievements

4. Uninvolved Parenting

በአካል ከልጆቻቸው ጋር ልሆኑ ይችላሉ ፡ ነገር ጊን በሀሳባቸው ና በስመታቸው ሌላ ቦታ ናቸው Uninvolved Parents Thinks that children do not need especial attention and guidance Have low expectation from their children Are extremely selfish Their children parent themselves Give little attention & respect for their children & others በአካል ከልጆቻቸው ጋር ልሆኑ ይችላሉ ፡ ነገር ጊን በሀሳባቸው ና በስመታቸው ሌላ ቦታ ናቸው

Possible Consequences on the Children: Low self-esteem & self-confidence Low respect for others & self Emotionally instable: stressed & depressed Lack of personal & social skills Not following established rules Not able to discharge any kind of responsibility Experience poor academic participation & results

So, Which of the 4 Parenting is effective in Shaping the Personalities of Our Children? Authoritative Children benefit best with authoritative approach to parenting, which combines affection & firm boundaries with an encouragement of children’s independence

How parents need to support their children’s Independence & Assertiveness ? By learning how to listen to their children Modeling the behavior they want to see in them Learn how to forgive By being consistent, fair, firm and fun Teach & guide rather than punish & control Rewarding good behavior Showing love & affection to them By enforcing limits that are fair & build on trust

What Influences the Way We Parent ? Many local & global findings revealed the ff: The way we were parented What we feel is right How someone has told us to parent What the research says What healthy adults say What unhealthy adults say…

Conclusion & Suggestions Effective parenting skills are important to learn Authoritative parenting approach works best Parents ought to show their children that they come first, that they are the most important ones in their life As the saying goes, “ To the world you might be one person, but to one person, you might be the world!!”

One More Thing: “ Children go where there is excitement & stay where there is Love !!”

Thanks !!! Thanks !!!