1. Some factors leading to initial attraction Proximity (more likely to form relationships with those who live near us, or that we interact with on a regular basis) Similarity (attitudinally, demographically) Emotional arousal Physical attractiveness (best predictor of desire to date) Benefits of attractiveness include: better character traits, income, performance evaluations, treatment by the legal system, mental health Matching issue (on average, people end up with others who are similar in physical attractiveness)

2. “Bridge” Study Misattribution of Emotional Arousal Anxiety, when paired with an attractive person (cue), can lead to the labeling of one’s emotional state as sexual attraction.

3. Attitude Similarity and Attraction How does attitude similarity affect attraction? Byrne and Nelson (1965) asked subjects to rate how much they liked a stranger after learning he agreed with varying proportions of their attitudes expressed on a questionnaire. (Higher numbers indicate greater liking.) As the graph shows, the greater the proportion of attitudes subjects shared with the stranger, the more subjects liked or were attracted to the stranger. 13.00 12.00 11.00 10.00 9.00 8.00 7.00 6.00.00.20.40.60.80 1.00 Attraction Toward Other person

4. Social validation – (similar others will support our beliefs) Cognitive Consistency --- (e.g., we like ourselves, and we like someone who is similar to us) Predict, anticipate the desires of others (e.g., their preferences regarding what do on a date) They will probably like us back (cost/benefit assessment) Why Similarity is Attractive

5. Repulsion Hypothesis of Attraction Premise --- Similarity does not add significantly to attraction Differences are disliked; people who are different are avoided Our Own Attitude Similar Other Neutral reaction Dissimilar Other Negative reaction Consistent with other theories (e.g., equity theory, balance theory, congruity theory, dissonance theory). When things are “off” we are motivated to restore equilibrium.

6. Misattribution of Friendly Behavior Males and females engaged in a 10 minutes conversation about school-related topics Overall, males saw the interaction as sexual in nature Male participants and male observers viewed the female as promiscuous Male participants viewed themselves as flirtatious and seductive Male observers viewed the male participant as flirtatious, seductive, and being attracted to the female

7. Equity Theory Inputs (Costs -- e.g., time, effort) Outputs (Rewards – e.g., security, respect, sexual fulfillment) Comparison Other (s) -- Compare inputs/outputs to: Other people Oneself in the past An idealized image Comparison Level for Alternatives

8. The Life Cycle of a Relationship Levinger (1980, 1983) describes five stages in the life cycle of relationships. As the relationship moves through the stages, it is affected by different variables and characterized by different degrees and kinds emotions. Relationship continues Ending Deterioration and decline Attraction Buildup Continuation/ consolidation Important variables influencing attraction Triggering factors: Proximity Similarity Erotic love Etc. Social-exchange and equity: Communication Self-disclosure Communal concern External supports Social-exchange and Equity/inequity: Relative attractiveness Of alternatives Barriers to dissolution Emotion High: Heady feeling of romantic love Low: Relationship in stable state High: Upset of deterioration And trauma of disruption

9. Recent Relationship Research --- Key Points One’s thoughts about social interactions Discovering similarities and differences (naturally) Searching out others and detecting information Evaluation of the process (good/bad) Strategies, plans Future projections Timing and sequencing of events and information Narratives (e.g., stories) about relationship interactions Who is told?, When are stories told?, What is told? Different accounts of actual events (rich source of information)