1. Interpersonal Communication
also called Dyadic
communication between two people
the relationship stage of communication
What is interpersonal communication?

2. Discussions about communication
Characteristics
Discussions about communication
Content Dimension
Relational Dimension
Face to Face
Mediated
Context: quantity
Quality:
Impersonal or interpersonal
Metacommunication
Messages
Quality
Channel

3. Types of Interpersonal Relationship
Acquaintances
Romantic Relationships
Work Relationships
Family Relationships
Friendships

4. Why do we build relationships with one person over another?
Proximity
Similarity
Complementary = opposites attract
Social Exchange (rewards-costs=outcome)
Appearance
Competence
Prefer talented but flawed
Exception: Hi or low self-esteem person wants perfect person
Reciprocal attraction
Other person likes you

5. How Do Relationships Develop?

6. Theories of Relational Development
_Knapps’s Developmental Model
Maintenance
Initiating
Experimenting
Intensifying
Integrating
Bonding
Differentiating
Circumscribing
Stagnating
Avoiding
Terminating
Forward or Backward
Quickly or Slowly
May Stabilize
Coming Together
Coming Apart

7. Dialectical Model Competing goals (dialectical tensions)
Connection vs Autonomy
Openness vs Privacy
Predictability vs Novelty

8. How do we build better and deeper relationships?
Intimacy
Self-Disclosure

9. Intimacy Physical Intellectual Emotional Shared Activities
touching, hugging, holding hands
Intellectual
Discussing issues of shared inerests and importance
Emotional
Sharing feelings
Shared Activities
Doing things together

10. GENDER and Intimacy

11. Gender Impacts Intimacy Styles
Females
Self-disclose
Reveal feelings
Share (-) and (+)
Sex is a way to express intimacy
Males
Do things together
Do things for you to show caring
Sex is a way to create (build) intimacy

12. Culture Impacts Intimacy Styles
Rebekah Nathan
My Freshmen Year
Collectivistic Cultures
Japan
More in-group vs outsiders
Individualistic Cultures
USA
Cocktail Party Conversationalists

13. Self-Disclosure:
deliberately revealing personal and significant information about oneself that would otherwise be unknown

14. Social Penetration Model and Self-Disclosure
Breadth: # of topics discussed
Depth: shift from non-revealing messages to personal messages
The greater the depth and breadth the more intimate the relationship.

15. Johari’s Window Model of Self-disclosure
Comprised of four quadrants: Open, Blind, Hidden and Unknown.
Quadrants become smaller or larger based on the amount of communication and self-disclosure in a relationship.
Generally the larger the open area, the more intimate the relationship.

16. What is appropriate self-disclosure?
Is the other person important to you?
Is the amount and type of disclosure appropriate?
Is the disclosure relevant?
Is the disclosure reciprocated?
Will it be constructive?
Is the risk of disclosing reasonable?

17. What is trust? What causes you to lose trust in someone?
-To believe that someone is honest and means no harm
The Free Dictionary

18. What can you do if you don’t want to self-disclose?
Equivocate
Hint (face-saving)
Lie

19. Lying Dating couples lie in about 1/3 of relationships
College students tell their mothers lies in 50% of conversations.
Average = 3 lies for every 10 minutes of conversation
Many lies are altruistic lies or “white lies”