1. SURVIVING THE CONFLICT AND KEEPING YOUR FAITH!

2. STEPS TO THE PERFECT “ANXIETY STORM” 1.A SIGNIFICANT CHANGE IN CONDITION. 2.FEEING RESPONSIBLE AND LACKING CONTROL. 3.WANTING SOMETHING FOR SOMEONE ELSE MORE THAN THEY WANT IT FOR THEMSELVES. 4.BELIEVING THAT YOU ARE RIGHT. 5.JUNIOR HIGH TYPE OF BEHAVIOR. 6.CONFUSION ABOUNDS!

3. HOW WE SPEND OUR TIME 1.SOCIAL RITUALS 2.PASTIMES 3.WORK 4.PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES 5.PLAY 6.INTIMACY

4. WHY WE PLAY PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES 1.NEED FOR ATTENTION 2.HABIT 3.SUBSTITUTE FOR INTIMACY 4.A GREAT AMOUNT OF FEELING/FRUSTRATION 5.ATTEMPT TO PLEASE OTHERS 6.ATTEMPT AT PERFECTION OR TO BE STRONG 7.UNCONSCIOUS ATTEMPT TO RESOLVE BAD FEELINGS

5. PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES THAT VESTRIES PLAY THE ETERNAL GAME TRIANGLE 1. ( Bad Feeling) RESCUER PERSECUTOR THREE MOST COMMON BAD FEELINGS 2. BF 3. BF VICTIM

6. HOW WE GENERALLY SPEND OUR TIME: INTIMACY PLAY PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES WORK PASTIMES SOCIAL RITUALS

7. THE FALL FROM GRACE 1.INTIMACY – LOST OR VERY RARE 2.PLAY – INFREQUENT FELLOWSHIP 3.PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES – 75 % OF ALL COMMUNICATION 4.WORK – LITTLE REAL WORK IS ACCOMPLISHED 5.PASTIMES – BECOMES THE ESSENCE OF TIME TOGETHER 6.SOCIAL RITUALS – THE DEPTH OF THE COMMUNITY

8. WHERE TO START 1.GET DIOCESE INVOLVED 2.LOOK FOR THOSE BEING IGNORED/UNAPPRECIATED 3.INTERPRET THEIR HISTORY BACK TO THEM 4.TAKE CARE OF PEOPLE FIRST 5.ALWAYS COURTESY 6.MAKE THE ENVIRONMENT SAFE 7.DYNAMIC PREACHING/ WORSHIP 8.SPEAK THE TRUTH IN ALL THINGS (WITH RESPECT)

9. WHERE TO START – (CONTINUED) 9. CLEAN UP/CLEAN OUT THE FACILITIES 10. ENCOURAGE THE $1.20 SPIRITUAL RULE 11. REFUSE TO PLAY THE PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES 12. ALWAYS SAY THREE POSITIVE THINGS FOR ONE NEGATIVE 13. BECOME AN APPRECIATION ADDICT 14. DREAM A DREAM AND TALK ABOUT IT 15. EAT TOGETHER - LOTS OF TIMES 16. FORM A TEAM AND MAKE GROUP DECISIONS

10. COPING WITH PERSONAL ANXIETY 1. CHANGE YOUR ENVIRONMENT ASAP (4.5 SECONDS) 2. LISTEN TO AND/OR CHANGE YOUR SELF TALK 3. MANIPULATE YOUR PERSONAL IMAGERY 4. FIND SOMEONE YOU TRUST TO TALK WITH 5. PRAY/READ PSALMS 6. AVOID PSYCHOLOGICAL GAMES 7. COMFORT YOURSELF 8. ADOPT THE “POWER POSE”

11. PRIME ROLE OF THE EPISCOPAL CHURCH “MINISTERING TO, OR PROVIDING SPIRITUAL SUPPORT, TO THOSE PERSONS WHO ARE EXPERIENCING A LIFE CRISIS; EXPECIALLY THOSE DEVELOPMENTAL ISSUES OF PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION TO THE SECOND HALF OF LIFE.” “BEING COMPANIONS ON THE SPIRITUAL JOURNEY”

12. WHY THE EPISCOPAL CHURCH IS PERFECT FOR THIS ROLE 1. HOSPITALITY/ACCEPTANCE OF THE DOCTRINE OF RADICAL WELCOMING AND CARING FOR OTHERS, ESPECIALLY THOSE IN MID LIFE. 2. SYMBOLS CONNECTING WITH THE DEEP INTERIOR OF PERSONS, UNCONSCIOUS MIND. 3. PURVEYORS OF RELIGIOUS/SPIRITUAL MYSTERY BY USE OF: THE SACRAMENTS, PRAYER BOOK AND PRAYERS MUSIC, VESTMENTS, CANDLES, INCENSE, ETC. FELLOW COMPANIONS ON THE JOURNEY! 4. (SALVATION BY HABERDASHERY?)

13. YOUR CHURCH VISION MUST INCLUDE: 1.MISSION STATEMENT 2.HOSPITALITY EMPHASIS ON DYNAMIC WELCOMING 3.MEANINGFUL WORSHIP 4.USE OF BUILDINGS AND GROUNDS 5.PASTORAL CARE TASKS/ROLES 6.EDUCATION PROGRAM GOALS/METHODS 7.DYNAMIC PREACHING 8.RELATIONSHIP WITH DIOCESE AND WORLD WIDE CHURCH

14. TRINITY EPISCOPAL CHURCH SONOMA, CA. (707) 938-4846, > trtri