Building up your Commentary Romeo and Juliet Style

What makes good commentary??

What good commentary does… 1.Analyzes the concrete detail in a fresh, insightful way 2.Goes deeper than the literal meaning of the CD 3.Uses specific academic word choice 4.Shows how your quote ties back to your thesis

Good Commentary Example Friar Lawrence is a reliable and wise mentor for Romeo and Juliet. As an example, when Romeo tells Friar Lawrence about his “newfound” love for Juliet, the Friar’s warning is that “Young men’s love then lies/not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes” ( ). Friar Lawrence offers this wise advice to Romeo in an effort to get him to reflect on whether or not his feelings are more solid than just being in love with how Juliet looks. The Friar shares this concern with Romeo because he deeply cares for the youth and wants to make sure that Romeo’s intentions with Juliet are more than what it was when he liked Rosaline.

Your Turn: Add a 2 nd CM!! Benvolio's peaceful nature is a vital part of the story. To illustrate, Benvolio pleads with Mercutio, "I pray thee good Mercutio, let's retire/the Capels are abroad and if we meet we shall not 'scape a brawl" ( ). CM#1: By Benvolio suggesting they leave the streets in an effort to avoid confrontation with the Capulets indicates that Benvolio is not concerned with keeping the Montague/Capulet feud going and would rather abide by the Prince's wishes. CM#2:

What bad commentary does…. 1.Uses “I” statements such as “I think…” 2.Gives plot summary instead of analysis 3.Is repetitive and vague because you don’t understand the literature. 4.Makes a generalized statement such as “Everybody does…” “Anyone knows…”

Our Bad Commentary Examples: TS-T-L-CD: Romeo is more impulsive than Juliet, as seen in his reaction to seeing her for the first time. To explain, when at the Capulet’s party, Romeo mused to himself, “Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight/For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night” ( ). CM#1: When Romeo sees Juliet, he acts stupid. CM#2: At the party, Romeo sees Juliet and talks to himself. CM#3: I think that the guy at the party doesn’t love the other girl anymore. CM#4: Romeo’s impulsive behavior is demonstrated here because anyone knows there is no such thing as “love at first sight.”

Bad Commentary Activity 1.Draw a line underneath what you’ve done so far. 2.I will show you the bad commentary examples again, one by one. 3.You will have 2 minutes to revise the “bad commentary,” to make it good commentary! Feel free to change words and word order to make a strong sentence of commentary. 4.You may use your notes. 5.After the 2 minutes, I will reveal the next sentence.