Building Relationships to Promote a Positive Classroom Environment TPC Seminar – March 11, 2013

There is a time and a place for everything.

Building Relationships Work on creating a tool box of ways to build relationships with students. What are some tools that you currently use? I noticed statements

You make deposits with every positive behavior you employ You withdraw the account each time you deploy a negative action. Relationship Bank What happens when your account reaches zero?

Principles of Love and Logic Three agreements: Use enforceable limits Provide choices within limits Apply consequences with empathy

Using enforceable limits Within the love and logic mindset the enforceable limits tells students how you will be running your life. “I’ll be ready to listen to you when your voice is calm like mine.” “I will give full credit for papers turned in on time.” “I listen to people who raise their hands. Thank you.”

From Garbage to Gold Garbage Statements Open your books to page 54. I’m not going to start until everyone is quiet. Don’t distract your seat-mate You can’t go to the restroom until I finish the directions. Gold statements I’ll be working from page 54. I’ll be starting once it is quiet. You’re welcome to stay in the classroom as long as you and others are not distracted. Feel free to go to the restroom when I am finished with directions.

Provide choices within limits People have a strong need for control. Share control Thinking Thinking Learning Learning affects future behavior

From sharing control to maintaining self-concept. Sharing control by offering choices: “Would you like to clean your room before or after dinner?” “This area needs to be cleaned up. Will you be cleaning it before lunch or during lunch?” “This assignment needs to be finished this week. Would you like to have it due Thursday or Friday?”

Offering choices when there are no difficulties helps to build the “savings account of control” for times when no choices are given.

Power struggles If the teacher doesn’t play along it is difficult for the student to continue.

SELF CONCEPT Other ways to improve self concept Use eye contact and smiles Allow kids to own their feelings instead of “I am proud of you” use “You can be proud of that” Let students learn from the consequences of their own behaviors

Apply consequences with empathy Four steps you can follow: State the problem Identify whose problem it is Show empathy Offer a positive relationship message Outside hurt versus Inside hurt Difference between consequences and punishment is where the individual interprets the hurt. Punishments are done to me. Consequences are a result of behavior.

Consequences If possible, let students come up with their own consequences. Be prepared with a consequence in case theirs are not appropriate. Model the problem solving technique with them.

Shared Thinking Thinking state vs. emotional state Every time you do something for the students that they can do for themselves, you are limiting them in the learning process.

There is a time and a place for everything.