Winning Ways to Talk with Parents/Caregivers A training for those who work with and care for young children Presenter: Tal Curry

What do you think is wrong with this baby?

Communication is….. How we express our Thoughts Feelings Ideas

We communicate in a variety of ways Exchange of words Expressions Body language Actions

Good Communication Warm and trusting relationships Cooperation Feelings of worth

Good communication Connects people together and Builds relationships

Poor Communication Breaks down relationships Can cause conflicts Causes feeling of worthlessness

Children are learning to understand the people around them - Modeling

Sometimes communicate things we don’t mean to. Threaten Lecture Afraid (“What I feel or want doesn’t matter.”) Disrespected or unappreciated (“I am really messed up.”) When we do this:A child/adult may feel:

Sometimes communicate things we don’t mean to. Demanding Judgmental Helpless (“I must do what others tell me. I can’t think for myself”) Unloved or bad (“I am not a good person.”) When we do this:A child/adult may feel:

Appropriate ways to communicate with parents Center self Address parent by name Talk in a conversational tone Talk with the parent and not at him/her – they are the expert Meet them where they are at (their level, they lead, Face to face with them Understand their space

Appropriate ways to communicate with parents Use “I” messages Be courteous (say please, thank you…) – Modeling good parenting for children Start from strengths – talk about 2 poistives before areas of challenge Use words they understand (and don’t talk too long!) Use words that encourage

Don’t forget to…. Get their attention first Use appropriate eye contact Remember Communication is also LISTENING

Remember conversation flows in both directions use “door openers” “Oh.” “Mm hmmm.” “Really?” “Okay.” “Um hum.” “Tell me more.” “Now that is interesting.” “Imagine that!” “How about that!”

Have a positive attitude You set the tone and the pace of your work, your parents will look to you for guidance.

Have a positive attitude You are a role model for parents and they will imitate you!!!

Make a difference that counts

You make a difference for children

Parent Change with Children Relational interventions Changing parent/caregivers behaviors How view the child Caregiver follows child’s lead

Strengths approach  Talk to people… do not interview them  Try to make people see you are not there to judge them, or even change them, but you are there to validate them  Talking about yourself  Be sensitive to where they come from

Questions 1. How does communication impact the development and nature of a relationship and effective methods to communicate? 2. What is the difference between being directive and non-directive when communicating with parents? 3. How do we involve parents in critical thinking/problem solving? 4. What are the differences between talking/relating with a friend versus parents in the program?