What is Your Dream ? d r e a m. 3 Big Questions: d r e a m Who am I? What matters? What do I want?

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Presentation transcript:

What is Your Dream ? d r e a m

3 Big Questions: d r e a m Who am I? What matters? What do I want?

What is Your Super Theory of Life? d r e a m Who We Are, What We Want and How We Get it.

d r e a m Super Theory Pleasure Manipulate Bully Wanting Boredom Success Self Control Conform Doing Social Comparison Integrity Choice Being Intrinsic

We Live 3 Lives d r e a m Birth – 25……..Self Discovery 26 – 50………...Experience 50 +…………….Wisdom It’s not too late to live your Dream Life.

Bigger Dreams for ALL: Dream Goals for a New Future d r e a m

Happiness: Life Satisfaction Positive Emotion | Passionate Engagement | Personal Meaning

One Life, Now 1. Life Alignment 2. Life Autonomy 3. Life Achievement Take the Dream Life Challenge.

IncompetenceCapabilitySkill Design Failure Mediocrity Success Dream Life Avoidance Willingness Interest Desire GTV Our dreams are discovered when our Design and Desires meet.

WHO AM I? Design d r e a m Traits Talents Track Record

d r e a m Pleasure Success Meaning Design: Traits & Talents Our Super Theory Determines Our Identity Achievement, Job, Thoughts Tribes Body, Emotions, Traumas Mind Body Spirit

1) What parts of your current life should be eliminated? 2) What do you need to add to your life that expresses your uniqueness? 3) What parts of your life should you invest in well above the average person’s life? 4) How are you going to be and live different than everyone else? 5) How do you define your unique approach to life? What do you stand for?

Who Am I? Traits d r e a m Enduring Strengths How You Experience Reality How You Want to Offer Value

Discovering Your Soul’s Traits What do you most value about me? What do you most admire about me? What do you most enjoy about me? VIA Signature Strengths AmericanDreamProject.org

WHO AM I? INNATE TRAITS Creativity Curiosity Open-mindedness Love of Learning Perspective Bravery Persistence Integrity Vitality Love Kindness Social Intelligence Citizenship Fairness Leadership Forgiveness & Mercy Humility/Modesty Prudence Self-regulation Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence Gratitude Hope Humor Spirituality

Who am I? Talents: 3 Clues d r e a m Compliments Energy, Effort, Ease Desire for Mastery

Who Am I? Skills for the 21 st Century d r e a m Integrity Relationships Wisdom

Discovering Your Talents What do you most value about me? What would you like me to do more of? What would you like me to do less of?

Your Dream Lifestyle Life List Live Rich

Drive: Prime Motive d r e a m Gain Grow Give Grow Gain

Lost Boys of Sudan

What can I do? “I can’t do everything, but I can do something. I will not let the things I cannot do prevent me from doing the things I can.” * Helen Keller Paraphrased

Our Drive is Our Message d r e a m Love or Fear

d r e a m What do I want? What does my soul desire?

d r e a m Are we cyborgs? Do we all want to be rock stars? Whose life are we living? Unplug, Ask, Listen. Pay attention to reality: never mistake a goal for a dream.

Soul Reflection 1. Unplug, Ask, Listen 2. Read, Discuss 3. Become Conscious

Positive Emotions, Passionate Engagement, Personal Meaning Where You Live How You Live Why You Live

Desire Deepest longings. Choice if no one cared. Energy gain. Lifestyle, Relationships, Career

Positive Emotions, Passionate Engagement, Personal Meaning Where You Live | How You Live | Why You Live Lifestyle

DESIRES: Career What do I want?

Future Proof Your Life Be Unique. Don’t Compete You already are. Just turn up the volume.

d r e a m Career: Be Original, Be Great, Be Passionate d r e a m Choice if no one cared. Unconventional job fit. Constant, creative learning. Energy gain.

So How Great Do You Want To Be? Source: Paul Arden GoodQuite GoodVery Good The Best in Your Field. The Best in the World.

Career: Design & Drive is What Counts d r e a m Stand Out, Don’t Fit In

Career: Drive d r e a m Transform Ambition to Inspiration Blind ambition is slavery. Change YOUR World.

Be Global Proof: Design & Drive is What Counts d r e a m Stand Out, Don’t Fit In Become an Expert with High Emotional Intelligence

d r e a m Career: Life Chapters d r e a m 10 Things You Want to Do Before You Die

Evolution of Work Value d r e a m Process Worker (Labor) Knowledge Worker (Facts) Creative Work (Ideas) Wisdom Work (Judgment) CAREER

DESIRES: Relationships What do I want?

d r e a m Without Love there is no happiness. With Love there is no emptiness. Relationships are the source of all human meaning. Relationships

Our Deepest Longing is Genuine Love d r e a m Spam instead of intimacy. Sex instead of love. Options instead of commitment.

Love requires both Intimacy and Commitment. d r e a m

Insecure, Undermining Aggressive, Bargaining Active Advocacy Pleasure Goals Integrity The Quality of Our Relationships Comes from Our Super Theory Demands/Threats Passive Design: Traits & Talents Achievement, Job, Thoughts Body, Emotions, Traumas

If Love Drives You, Create More Love d r e a m Understand Affirm Involve

Wisdom d r e a m Reason – Examine your assumptions. Common Sense – What results are you getting? Intuition – What do you already know?

Soul’s Desire d r e a m Will not cause innocents to suffer. Happiness, Contentment, Patience Grateful, Optimistic

AmericanDreamProject.org

d r e a m What if there was another way? d r e a m The greatest good for the greatest number produces the greatest good for each individual. - John Nash - John Nash

CHOOSE

Join the 21 st Century Revolution Find Your Voice Act for the Common Good

Swim or Surf

d r e a m Promise Broken? d r e a m Failure of Leadership. Decline of Middle Class. Cost of Education Skyrocketing. Society is not Designed to Produce Happiness. Social Trends of Gen21

d r e a m BOOMER WORLD: Dream or Nightmare d r e a m OVER Work OVER Stress Over Consumption Pleasure + Goals =

Our Children Can’t Afford Homes Education Insurance

Rising Tide of Change Social Justice OPRAH BONO CLOONEY PITT/JOLIE POP CULTURE Zero Waste SUSTAINABILITY PATAGONIA GE WINDMILLS WAL-MART SUNEDISON Labor Rights SOCIAL ACCOUNTABILITY NIKE GAP SA 8000 Save the Future PERSONAL MEANING GEN21 BOOMER MAKE A DIFFERENCE REDEMPTION Heal the World PHILANTHROPY GATES CLINTON BUFFET BUSH 1 GOOGLE EBAY The Storm Revolutions 1. Declaration of Independence “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” 2. Gettysburg Address & Emancipation Proclamation “…By the people, for the people.” 3. New Deal to Civil Rights “I have a dream.” 4. Noo Future “We have 40 years to save the world.” “Is this the best we can do?” LIFE LIBERTY HAPPINESS

What’s Happening? Cost of Gas up 160% Home Prices up 325% School Tuition up 330%

Gen21 Don’t want Boomer World (Over work, over stressed, over stuffed) Want Families that Work Want the Truth, not Spin, not Hype Want More than Success – a Life They Value and Enjoy Their Dream is Their Career Real Work/Real Meaning/Real Rewards Want to Make Their Difference d r e a m

Gen21’s Confusion Relationships – Avoid Commitment Materialism – Take What You Can Get Work – Too Many Choices / No Choices d r e a m

PATAGONIA CLINTON Rising Tide of Change Social Justice Heal the World Zero Waste Labor Rights Save the Future OPRAH BONO POP CULTURE PHILANTHROPY SUSTAINABILITY PERSONAL MEANING GATES GE WINDMILLS NIKE GAP GEN21 BOOMER GOOGLE EBAY CLOONEY PITT/JOLIE BUFFET BUSH 1 WAL-MART MAKE A DIFFERENCE REDEMPTION SOCIAL ACCOUNTABILITY SUNEDISON SA 8000 United Voice & Vision Greatest good for each and all Universal Principles Life, Liberty & Pursuit of Happiness Personal Action Design + Desire + Drive New Enterprise Model (GTV) New Education Model (Free Lifelong Learning) New Civic Model (Common Good) American Dream Project What is Your Dream? What is Your Promise? The Storm Revolutions 1. Declaration of Independence “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” 2. Gettysburg Address & Emancipation Proclamation “…By the people, for the people.” 3. New Deal to Civil Rights “I have a dream.” 4. Noo Future “We have 40 years to save the world.” “Is this the best we can do?” LIFE LIBERTY HAPPINESS

Dream Life Requirements 1. Conscious Integrity 2. Willful Choice 3. Creative Effort 4. Morally Significant Goals Source: Chris Peterson 2006

4 American Revolutions CRISI S REVOLUTION More Happiness More Suffering

The Grid Media-Financial Complex The Grid Media-Financial Complex

Belonging Independence GrowthSecurity Wisdom Change the World Still Be Home for Dinner What do we want? Source: M. Mark

(Belonging) (Independence) (Growth) (Security) FEAR Traps of Fear Controlling Stuff Pleasure Willfulness Prime Directive + Prime Motive are necessary to avoid the traps of fear.

5 Sources of Anxiety 1.Personal Confusion 2.Emotional Anxiety 3.Reality Distortion 4.Relationship Difficulties 5.Spiritual Uncertainty

WORK LOVE PLAY Personal Interests Make a difference Relationships What we want: Fulfillment Change the World and Still Be Home for Dinner

PROBLEM: Life cannot be scheduled Trying to balance leads to more anxiety. Balance is not fulfillment. “If I schedule time with my children, my spouse and at the gym, I will feel balanced.” I Can Mange My Time Better and Find Fulfillment. 1 st Catastrophic Error

I Can Achieve My Way to Fulfillment. 2 nd Catastrophic Error PROBLEM: Salt water will not quench your thirst. “If I do what I should…” 1.I will be acceptable, loveable, appreciated. 2.My life will turn out the way I need it to. 3.I will feel fulfilled…insecure, confident, perfectionist.

Magical Thinking will Make Me Happy. 3 rd Catastrophic Error PROBLEM: Self deception can lead to a counterfeit calling. “If I follow my heart, live my dream, find my bliss… I will be fulfilled.”

Our Thinking is Thoughtless 40,000 Thoughts per Day: Random, Repetitive, Unfocused 95% of our Decisions: Unconscious, Habitual and Unreflective Thinking is Dominated by: Bias and Confusion Often Resulting in Self-inflicted Misery.

“Not everything that counts can be counted.” - Albert Einstein The Universe: 4 % is Matter we Understand 23%is Dark Matter 73%is Dark Energy E=MC 2 The Truth is Always More Than we Know

Action Chain Perception Evaluation Emotions Action The Quality of our Thinking Determines the Quality of our Lives

How We Think Intuitive Practical Analytical Inner Self Outer Self Self Concept

High Achievers Thinking Intuitive Practical Analytical Inner Self Outer Self Self Concept

Just Who Do You Think You Are? What happens if we are true to ourselves? If we are dysfunctional? Conforming? What are my Values? Thoughts? Decisions? Identity Integrity Decisions Values Thoughts Results Actions

Wisdom is the Insight to use Knowledge, Judgment and Virtue for the Greatest Good. …to Think and Act in a way that results in fulfillment.

Am I a Slugbot? Am I a Slug?

What am I? 8 Questions : Wisdom Question 1 I am not my body… I am not my emotions… I am not my thoughts… I am not my roles… WHAT AM I? Belief Traps

Who is making my decisions? My body…. Food, sleep Emotions…. Shopping, sex Mental anxiety…. Drinking, drugs, sports Roles…perfectionistic demands If decisions are driven by: Stress pushes us to lower levels of consciousness.

What am I great at? 8 Questions : Wisdom Question 3 What do you receive COMPLIMENTS for? What would you do for FREE? What do you LOVE to do that you do WELL?

Your talent is the light that illuminates what your soul wants. What do I want? DesirePurposeTalent + +

We are clear on what we don’t want. 1.Illness 2.Poverty 3.Loneliness 4.Boredom 5.Powerlessness 6.Meaninglessness Disaster Movie or Hero’s Journey?

Hero’s Journey: Adult Maturity Dysfunctional Functional Fulfilling Transcendent Autonomous Manipulative Impulsive Conscientious Conforming 35% 55% 10% ThoughtWill Responsibilities Wants Choice

Is able to ask for what you desire See multiple points of view without being confused (both/and) Patient and decisive Persistent and flexible Can act in ambiguous circumstance Clear on personal gifts and shortcomings Passionate interests and experiences joy Has a clear sense of purposeAutonomy Autonomy requires the highest level of personal maturity and wisdom. It requires nothing less than a new understanding of who we are.

What does my Soul Desire? Do want Don’t want Desire Meaning Talent Can Do Well Inspires You Work Family Friends Romantic partner Health Passionate interests Service Legacy 8 Questions : Wisdom Question 4 Positive Vision Drudgery

To Be Fulfilled: To Become Conscious of Our Lives’ Significance What happens - is least important. Our motives, our gifts, our learning – are most important. Soul’s wisdom reveals what’s most important – where we are growing and where we are stuck. Observe our lives from the viewpoint of our souls. All we have to do is… ASK!

Integrity = Engaging in your Prime Directive 80% of your time. PRIME DIRECTIVE

All Feelings Decay into a Concept Practical: Are you meeting my needs? Analytical: Are you doing what you are supposed to?

REAL Love Understand 2. Affirm 3. Involve + + Intrinsic Practical Systemic

Romance TOUCH THOUGHTFULNESS TIME

Truth Telling OPENHIDDEN Bully3 Aggressive Dominate Demand Threaten Force Insist Goal: Win Result: Isolation Peacemaker1 Passive Avoid Conflict Agreeable Goal: Harmony Result: Depression Influencer4 Respectful Enthusiastic Authentic/ Sincere Goal: Shared Reality Result: Trust Manipulator2 Passive Aggressive Deceive Guilt Blame Criticize Victim Goal: Control Result: Low Trust

Pursuit of Truth Believes in the myth of the right choice. Needs to examine all choices. Keeps options open. Drowns in the anxiety of over-choice. Loses contact with truth. Knows what they want. Believes in making the choice right. Engages in progressive action. Commits to valuing their choice. Discovers more truth. High Achiever Maximizer

Matterhorn or Splatterhorn

Fulfillment Self Discipline Fulfillment Emptiness Self Absorbed Enjoy Prime Directive Value Prime Motive

Change the World and Still Be Home for Dinner Leave with a Loving Heart an Open Mind No Regrets No Regrets. and