Self-Esteem

Definitions Self-Esteem: How much you value, respect, and feel confident about yourself (General Attitude) Self-Concept: How you view yourself/ Knowledge about self Optimism: To put the most favorable actions and events or to anticipate the best outcome. Pessimism: Gloomy, hopeless, disheartened, discourages, demoralized If you feel valued, loved, and accepted by others, and you value, love, and accept yourself your overall attitude on life is good. Good self-esteem affects the overall attitude of a person. Taking healthful risks and challenges can increase a person’s self-esteem It increases when you feel you can succeed or when you master new challenges. Positive Self-talk is important Self-concept is a global evaluation of attributes, attitudes, abilities and values that a child believes defines who he is

Achieving a Healthy Self-Esteem Develop a positive self-concept Willing to take Healthy Risks- Pushing yourself, expanding your mind, nurturing your spirit Positive Attitude Be Optimistic! Honest Communication- Being assertive Take responsibility for health Being pro-active in making important decisions Confidence in abilities Expect others to treat you with respect Have a firm foundation for difficult times Realize you are unique and you don’t have to go with the crowd to find acceptance Be Optimistic! Who wants to be around someone who never expects anything to work out? Take responsibility for health- keep body, mind and relationships in a working condition Having a firm foundation for difficult times- knowing hard times will eventually pass and not giving up because of belief in self

Low Self-Esteem may be a cause of: Depression Suicide Substance Abuse Violence Extreme (Dangerous) Behaviors Eating Disorders Weakened Mental Health

Benefits of High Self-Esteem Increased Respect Increased Confidence Increased Motivation Feeling Valued Increased Respect- Respect of self and others. Taking care of own body (no drugs, alcohol, limit risky behaviors) Don’t criticize self (No put-downs) Increased Confidence-Likely to reach goals and feel motivated to challenge yourself Feeling valued and important to family, friends, and community

Attitude Story Jerry was the kind of guy you love to hate. He was always in a good mood and always had something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, "I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Jerry replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, Jerry, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.' I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.”

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy", I protested. "Yes it is," Jerry said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live life.” I reflected on what Jerry said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it. Several years later, I heard that Jerry did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning, and was held up at gunpoint by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma center. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. "The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door", Jerry replied. "Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live, or I could choose to die. I chose to live. "Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?", I asked. Jerry continued, "The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the emergency room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read, 'He's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action." "What did you do?", I asked. "Well, there was a big, burly nurse shouting questions at me", said Jerry. She asked if I was allergic to anything. "Yes", I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply... I took a deep breath and yelled, "Bullets!" Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead." Jerry lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.

What are your Strengths & Weaknesses?

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs (Pg. 70) Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a ranked list of those needs essential to human growth and development. They are the true human needs.

Level 1: Physical- Need to satisfy basic needs of hunger, thirst, sleep and shelter

Level 2: Safety- Need to be secure from danger

Level 3: Belonging- Need to love and to be loved, need to belong

Level 4: Feeling Recognized- Need to achieve, need to be recognized

Level 5: Reaching Potential- The need for self-actualization (Striving to be the best you can, reaching your potential)

You control what you become! Learn from your weaknesses and focus on strengths