Relationships: Healthy and Unhealthy Lesson 29

Objectives Demonstrate strategies for communicating needs, wants and emotions in healthy ways Analyze the importance of healthy strategies that help prevent physical, sexual and emotional abuse such as date rape Identify the qualities and character traits that promote healthy relationships with peers, family and friends Identify professional health services available to assist those with unhealthy relationships Evaluate the effects of family on relationships on physical, mental/emotional and social health Examine causes and effects of stress within families and develop strategies for managing stress Apply strategies for avoiding violence within the family Identify family situation requiring professional health services and explain how to access those services

Healthy Relationships Relationship: bond or connection you have with other people Can have positive and negative effects on your physical, mental/emotional and social health Family members, friends and communities can be a great source for healthy relationships Friendship: significant relationship between two people that is based on caring, trust, and consideration Citizenship: the way you conduct yourself as a member of the community

The Three C’s of Building Healthy Relationships Communication Your ways of sending and receiving messages Verbal and nonverbal Thoughts, feelings, expectations Cooperation Working together for the good of all Compromise A problem solving method that involves each participant’s giving up something to reach a solution that satisfies everyone “give and take”

Healthy Relationship Characteristics Mutual respect and consideration Respect even if people disagree Accepting others’ tastes and opinions Honesty Confidence to be open and honest about actions, thoughts and feelings Dependability Trustworthy Reliable Commitment Participants willing to work together and make sacrifices benefitting everyone involved

Unhealthy Relationships: Preventing and Overcoming Abuse Abuse: physical, mental/emotional or sexual mistreatment of one person by another

Types of Abuse Physical abuse Emotional abuse Intentional infliction of bodily harm or injury on another person Emotional abuse Verbal abuse Using words to mistreat or injure another person Stalking Repeated following, harassment or threatening on an individual to frighten or cause him or her harm

Dating Violence On the rise Includes all forms of abuse—physical, emotional, and sexual Some teens accept this as a normal part of a relationship but this is NOT true Signs of an unhealthy dating relationship Expressions of jealousy Attempts to control a partner's behavior Use of insults or put downs to manipulate a partner Use of guilt to manipulate a partner

Avoiding Domestic Violence Any violence against family members Recognize Be aware of abuse acts Remember it takes many forms Resist Stand up for yourself Run away from the abuser Report Tell a trusted adult

Overcoming Abuse Victims Abusers Call law enforcement immediately if you or someone you know if raped or physically abused Get tested for STDs and HIV Talk with a counselor Abusers Often abusers were victims, and are repeating what they have learned in the ‘cycle of violence’ Counseling Treatment programs with mental health professionals Lean skills for developing and maintaining healthy relationships Time health, pg 354 read

The Role of The Family

What is family? The basic unit of society Health of society is directly related to the health of the family Mutual love and respect Serves as a protective factor, helping children and teens to avoid risky behaviors

Importance of Family Meeting physical and other basic needs Provide food, clothing, and shelter Adults ensure children get medical and dental checkups Teaches children how to live safely in the environment Meeting mental/emotional needs Emotional support Unconditional love Contributes to the development of a positive self concept Meeting social needs Children learn how to communicate with other from their family Instill a value system in children Teaching children to accept differences in others Developing a value system Leaned from family Helps you to make responsible decisions Determines your character Sharing culture and tradition Enriches family members Develops a sense of pride Ex for safe living: look both ways before crossing the street, never get into a car with a stranger

Strengthening Family Relationships Demonstrate care and love Affirmation: positive feedback that help others feel appreciated and supported Showing empathy Show support Especially during difficult times Talk about your feelings and be a good listener Demonstrate trust Earn trust through honesty, reliability and loyalty Express commitment Willingness to work together to make sacrifices for the benefit of the entire family Be responsible Think before you act Avoid risky behaviors Be accountable for your actions

Strengthening Relationships Continued… Spend time together Eat meals together Plan fun activities that all can participate in Respect individuality Accept individual tastes, talents and opinions Work together to solve problems Identify and workout problems before they escalate Plan events together Be sensitive to others’ needs Pay attention to how others feel Use good communication skills Respect of privacy Survey class to see what responsibilities teens are assuming within their family, write a paragraph describing something you can do to help out your family

Changes in Family Structure Divorce Birth of a new child Remarriage Death Adoption

Separation and Divorce Separation: decision between married individuals to live apart from each other Divorce: legal end to a marriage contract Custody: legal decision about who has the right to make decisions affecting the children in a family and who has the responsibility of physically caring form them Could be granted to one parent (sole custody) or divided among both (joint custody) Remarriage after a divorce can also be very stressful on a family

Death of a Family Member Grief: the sorrow caused by the loss of a loved one Strategies for dealing with grief Focus on happy memories Accept your feelings Join a support group Seek help from a grief counselor

Changes in Family Circumstances Moving Teens may be anxious about making new friends and adjusting to a new school If a result of a divorce, children may miss the parent who no longer lives with them Financial problems Loss of a job, medical emergencies, overdue bills Anxiety Often leads to arguments about spending habits Illness and disability Disrupts a family’s normal activities Change in schedules to care for the sick or disabled person Stress Sharing in responsibility for the care of the disabled person can help to lessen stress Drug and alcohol abuse Threatens health of the entire family Seek immediate help if a family member has a substance abuse problem Draw a picture of your family, on the back of the paper write about changes your family has experience throughout your life. How have you dealt with these changes? If you don’t want me to read this because it is too personal write don’t read at the top and I won’t

Coping with Family Changes Strategies for managing family stress: Do what you can to help Read books about the subject or talk to people who have faced a similar problem Use stress management techniques

Help for Families Crisis center Foster care A facility that handles emergencies and provides referrals to an individual needing help Many communities also have crisis hot lines Foster care Temporary arrangement in which a child is placed under the guidance and supervision of a family or an adult who is not related to the child by birth Provide havens for abused or neglected children Various organizations offering services to victims of spousal abuse Food Shelter Clothing Counseling Support groups Individuals share their problems and get advice from others dealing with similar issues Medication Exploring issues pg 288, Time health activity pg 296 (brainstorm list, write poem, give poem to the person), search for lyrics that talk about relationships (how does this affect attitudes in society or does it)