Looking Out/Looking In Eleventh Edition Chapter Nine: Improving Communication Climates Ronald B. Adler, Russell F. Proctor II, and Neil Towne

Improving Communication Climates

Communication Climate: Confirming Communication Recognition Acknowledgement Endorsement

Communication Climate: Disconfirming Communication Verbal Abuse Complaining Impervious Responses Interrupting Irrelevant Responses The worst sin towards our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them; that’s the essence of inhumanity. George Bernard

Communication Climate: Disconfirming Communication Tangential Responses Impersonal Responses Ambiguous Responses Incongruous Responses The worst sin towards our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them; that’s the essence of inhumanity. George Bernard

Communication Climate: How Communication Climates Develop Escalatory Conflict Spirals De-Escalatory Conflict Spirals

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Causes: Face-Threatening Acts

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Types of Defensive Reactions Attacking the Critic Verbal Aggression Sarcasm How Critical are You? http://www.rateyourself.com/poll.cfm/Subject_ID/3/Poll_ID/4001

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Types of Defensive Reactions Distorting Critical Information Rationalization Compensation Regression

Question: Gregor confronts his roommate, Patrick, with a complaint, “Pat, you haven’t taken out the trash or done any dishes in weeks. It’s starting to bug me.” Patrick knows he hasn’t done much around the house but he doesn’t want Gregor to think poorly of him. He makes up an explanation and responds, “Yeah, sorry about that, but I think I’ve been coming down with something.” Patrick’s response is an example of: a. rationalization b. compensation c. repression d. regression

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Types of Defensive Reactions Avoiding Dissonant Information Physical Avoidance Repression Apathy Displacement

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Preventing Defensiveness in Others Evaluation Versus Description Control Versus Problem Orientation Strategy Versus Spontaneity Neutrality Versus Empathy Superiority Versus Equality Certainty Versus Provisionalism

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Saving Face The Clear Message Format Behavioral Description Interpretation Feeling Consequence Intention

Question: What is missing from this clear message? “The other day when you left the office door open, I thought you were being careless about our agreement. I’m frustrated because my personal belongings could be stolen from my desk.” a. It does not describe behavior. b. It does not describe your interpretation of the behavior. c. It does not describe your intention. d. Nothing is missing from this clear message.

Defensiveness: Causes & Remedies Responding Nondefensively to Criticism Seek More Information Agree with the Critic

Responding Nondefensively to Criticism - Seek More Information Ask for Specifics Guess About Specifics Paraphrase the Speaker’s Ideas Ask What the Critic Wants Ask About the Consequences of Your Behavior Ask What Else is Wrong

Responding Nondefensively to Criticism - Agree with the Critic Agree with the Facts Agree with the Critic’s Perception

Question: Agreeing with the critic involves: a. Agreeing with facts that are correct, even if they portray your behavior in a negative light b. Agreeing that the critic should try to see things your way c. Apologizing and verbally agreeing with the critic’s evaluation of your behavior, even if you don’t really believe it yourself d. All of the above