Chapter Three Apply Your Best Listening Skills

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 2 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Quote for the Chapter “No man ever listened himself out of a job.” Calvin Coolidge

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 3 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Objectives 1. Know the difference between hearing and listening. 2. Know internal, environmental, and interactional factors that complicate the listening process. 3. Assess your own listening skills and set goals for improvement. 4. Avoid five particularly ineffective behaviors that inhibit effective listening. 5. Employ four simple, positive approaches to enhance your active listening.

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 4 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. The Way It Is…How Can You Help Me? Try Listening!

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 5 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Doesn’t Anybody Ever Listen? It’s easy to hear what the customer says, but great customer service begins with great listening skills.

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 6 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Poor Listening = The #1 Communication Problem Of the four basic communication skills Reading Writing Speaking Listening One is not formally taught

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 7 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. The difference between listening and hearing Hearing is a purely physical activity Listening involves the physiological process

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 8 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. What Are Your Listening Habits? How often do you find yourself relying on these ten bad listening habits? Pg. 42

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 9 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Listening Style People-oriented Content-oriented Action-oriented Time-oriented

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 10 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. People-Oriented show a strong concern for others and their feelings get their energy from others and find much meaning in relationships seek to understand the life stories of others focus on emotions, be empathetic and use appeal to emotion in their arguments may seem vulnerable and will use this to show that they are harmless. can find problems when they become overly involved with others may associate so strongly with others they do not see limitations and faults may be drawn into unwise relationships may be seen as intrusive when they seek to connect with others who are not so relationship-oriented

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 11 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Content-oriented interested more in what is said rather than who is saying it or what they are feeling assess people more by how credible they are and will seek to test expertise and truthfulness focus on facts and evidence and happily probe into detail cautious in their assessment seeking to understand cause-and-effect and sound proof before accepting anything as true look for both pros and cons in arguments and seek solid logical argument can run into trouble when they ignore the ideas reject information because it does not have sufficient supporting evidence

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 12 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Action-oriented interested first on what will be done, what actions will happen, when and who will do them seek 'so what' answers in their questions and look for plans of action like clear, crisp descriptions and answers that are grounded in concrete reality like structure, bullet-points and numbered action items can be impatient and hurry speakers towards conclusions critical of people who start with the big picture and talk in ideas or concepts appear overly concerned with control and less with the well-being of other people

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 13 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Time-oriented have their eyes constantly on the clock organize their day into neat compartments and will allocate time for listening, though will be very concerned if such sessions over-run manage this time focus by talking about time available and seeking short answers which are to the point may constrain and annoy people who are focused first on people elements and want to take as long as is needed

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 14 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. What Contributes to Listening? Internal elements Environmental elements Interactional elements

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 15 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Internal Elements Affecting Listening 1. The words or sounds used by the message source must be received by the hearer. 2. The words need to make sense.

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 16 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Environmental Elements Affecting Listening Our individual listening capacity The presence of noise The use, or misuse, of gatekeepers

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 17 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Individual Listening Capacity Too MUCH information Too little information

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 18 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. The Presence of Noise

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 19 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. The Use or Misuse of Gatekeepers Gatekeeper: one who previews incoming information to determine if it is appropriate to the needs of the person the message is aimed at

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 20 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Interactional Elements Affecting Listening Self-centeredness Self-protection

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 21 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Effects of Self-Centeredness Upon Listening We sometimes listen just long enough to formulate our counterargument.

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 22 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Effects of Self-Protection on Listening

Listening Habits to Avoid

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 24 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Stop Talking You can never become a better listener till you aren’t disciplined to be quiet until others have expressed their thought fully.

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 25 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Prepare to Listen Decide to set aside time so that you can focus on listening Mentally disconnect from other matters playing on your mind

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 26 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Avoid Faking Attention The “wide asleep listener” Eyes on speaker, mind elsewhere Automatic nodding Commit yourself to the conversation

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 27 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Be Patient, Defer Disagreement Changing channels Tuning out Be patient and listen

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 28 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Listen for More than the Facts Listen for feelings, impressions, and emotions Listen for what they are not saying People buy based on emotions and feelings Go beyond the facts and words

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 29 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Bite Your Tongue before Interrupting We want the speaker to get to the point We interrupt for clarification We want information immediately Be patient and wait for the speaker to finish

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 30 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Do Men and Women Listen Differently? Men Communicate to: Compete with others Dominate themselves Says “mm hum” I agree with you Women Communicate to: Build bonds Be supportive Be sympathetic Says “mm hum” Listening but doesn’t necessarily agree with the speaker

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 31 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. To improve listening effectiveness, take positive steps to better listening

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 32 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Reinforce the Customer with Positive Nonverbal and Verbal Cues

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 33 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Solicit clarification Clarify tactfully Don’t figure it out on your own Don’t guess or interpret Don’t worry about sounding uninformed Take the time and make the effort to understand

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 34 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Minimize the Number of Gatekeepers (whenever possible) Avoid sending an intermediary to get a story for you Avoid requesting that someone tell his or her story to your assistant and let that person synthesize the information for you

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 35 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Try counter-attitudinal advocacy (CAA) Take the other person’s position Restate the position that is counter to your own Defend that position Ask if your interpretation is correct If not, try again

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 36 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Take Notes

Listening Game

Customer Service, 5e Paul R. Timm 38 © 2011, 2008, 2005, 2001 Pearson Higher Education, Upper Saddle River, NJ All Rights Reserved. Of all the sources of information we have when dealing with customers, listening is the most important.