What is a zombie ? What does a zombie look like? Act like? Sound like? Smell like?

Dramatic pause for what will (hopefully) be fabulous answers.

NO! You are all wrong!

A zombie looks, acts, sounds and smells just like an…

… 8 th grader who has just finished 5 days of SAGE testing!

So, now that we’ve established that Ms. Nielsen has an entire classroom full of zombies …

… let’s write poetry about ourselves! And other zombies !

FYI: Ms. Nielsen really is freaked out by the idea of zombies, and they are but it seems so appropriate for the occasion that we’re doing zombie poetry anyway.

Let’s write a haiku zombie poem! Oh you lucky, lucky, teenage zombies. You don’t get to do awesome stuff like this in science and math, now do you?

What is a haiku, you may ask?

A haiku is a dense little nugget of poetry with some very simple rules: it has to be three lines, and those lines have to be five syllables, seven syllables, and five syllables. That's it.

That's it. Of course, there has to be some poetic merit. It can't just be 17 syllables chopped into three bits. But it can be about anything. So why not zombies ? waves/haikuform.html

Here’s an example: Nothing more terrible than zombie adolescence... except Grandpa's breath. 3 lines of poetry: 5/7/5 syllables 5 syllables No/thing/ more/ smell/y/ 7 syllables than/ zom/bie/ a/do/le/scence 5 syllables ex/cept/ Grand/pa's/ breath.

Do you want to see some more examples of zombie haiku ? Of course you do! Most of the haiku on the next few slides are from but Ms. Nielsen did write one of them. Can you guess which one?

Zombie Bruce Springsteen was not "Born to Run"; no, he was born to eat brains. Crowding in the street The zombies shuffle their feet No one left to eat. Dismembered zombies Heads roll around on the floor. Soccer, anyone? Wading, the fish nip and nibble off my ankles. Oh, no! Zombie fish!

Playing fetch with Spot is dangerous when the bones he brings back still move. Zombies are no fun, When you see one you must run, Or shoot with your gun. Slick shiny jiggly and red, is it jello or a snack for undead? (written by Chris Crowe) The vegan zombie cares not for sweet grey matter they cry out for graaaaaaaaaaains!

Crowding in the street The zombies shuffle their feet No one left to eat After surgery Zombies cleanup and delight In take-out dinner. I hunger for your delicious cerebellum. Where's the ice cream scoop? Autumn's bold decay cannot stop the oncoming waves of undead flesh.

Now it’s time for you to write your own haiku. One final word: Zombies are gross and disgusting, but please don’t may your haiku so disgusting that we’re crossing the line into violating school, state or federal laws or the rules of human decency. Thank you!