Sexual Identity

Visualization Characteristics of attraction

Process Questions How do you know if you’re attracted to someone versus just being friends? Do you think media portrayals of attractions reflect real life? Do you think you can choose whom you are attracted to?

Sexual Orientation Sexual orientation is a term that refers to a person’s feelings of emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to others. Everyone has a sexual orientation, which is part of who we are as people.

Confused? Sometimes people can be confused about the right terms to use when talking about sexual orientation-for example, whether “gay” means the same as “homosexual.” To talk about sexual orientation in a respectful manner, it is helpful to define different words for sexual orientation and gender identity.

Sexual Identity Vocabulary List Heterosexual Straight Homosexual Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender Gender Identity Questioning LGBTQ Ally

Additional definitions for clarification Queer: A word that may be used to describe people who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. The term “queer” is currently used by some people within the LGBTQ community as an affirmation of sexual and gender identities as different and wonderful, as in, “I’m queer and proud”. The term “queer” however, has historically also been a derogatory word used against gay and lesbian people or those suspected of being gay or lesbian. Caution should be exercised in using the word because of this historical association.

Biological sex vs. gender identity: Biological sex is the chromosomal characteristic of being male or female. According to the American Psychological Association, gender identity is a person’s internal sense of being male, female, or something else. So gender identity is whether a person identifies as a man, woman, or another gender construct, regardless of that person’s biological sex.

Myths & Facts about Sexual Orientation page 11 in your student workbook One reason people create myths is to attempt to understand something they don’t know about or can’t control. One way to dispel myths is to get the facts!

Myth or Fact You can tell someone is gay by looking at them.

Myth People of every sexual orientation express themselves in many different ways. There’s a difference between personal expression and sexual orientation. Usually, the way people express themselves to the world (the clothes they wear, how they cut their hair, how they act) is not a sign of their sexual orientation. If you try to guess people’s sexual orientation from their outward appearance, you could be making incorrect and judgmental assumptions.

Myth or Fact 2. Gay parents can have kids who are straight.

Fact No one, not even parents, can make someone else gay, straight, or bisexual. Gay parents can have kids who are straight, just like straight parents can have kids who are gay.

Myth or Fact 3. A girl who dresses like a boy is probably gay.

Myth Sexual orientation (whom someone is attracted to) is different than gender expression (how someone demonstrates being a boy or a girl, including hair, clothing, make-up, etc.). There are lots of different ways to express gender, and how people choose to dress is not necessarily a reflection of their sexual orientation.

Myth or Fact 4. Homosexuality exists in almost every species.

Fact Scientists have found that homosexuality is as much a part of nature as heterosexuality. They have observed homosexual relationships among many kinds of animals.

Myth or Fact 5. A guy who doesn’t want to be sexual with a girl is probably gay.

Myth The idea that guys always want to have sex is a stereotype that can be harmful to both men and women. It’s normal and OK for men and for women to say NO to sex at any time. Whether people want to have sex doesn’t say anything about their sexual orientation. No one should feel pressured into having sex with someone else in order to “prove” something.

Myth or Fact 6. Bisexual people are really gay but don’t want to admit it.

Myth Identifying as bisexual means having emotional, romantic or sexual attractions to both men and women. While some people who identify as bisexual may be more attracted to men or to women at different times in their lives, bisexuality is a separate sexual orientation. A person who identifies as bisexual who dates a man may later date a woman, and vice versa.