2. Life needn’t be one big compromise if you can negotiate successfully Presented by Sebastian Salicru JMW Consultants The Executive Assistant Network National Congress 2008 13th & 14th May 2008, Luna Park, Sydney

3. About ♦Established 1982 with a global presence and offices in USA, Europe & Australia – Asia Pacific Region. ♦Purpose – to enable individuals, teams and organisations to achieve extraordinary performance. ♦Practice has three areas: 1. Organisational Transformation 2. Partnering and collaboration on large complex projects 3. Accelerated Development of Leaders and Managers ♦Focus is on assisting clients to deliver extraordinary outcomes and results.

4. Context - The Renaissance EA is a modern day corporate hero Modern demands of the role of an EA have created a whole new range of developmental issues, including:  becoming invaluable assets for their executives  need to be proactive  being a natural leader  maintaining a good working relationship with numerous key stakeholders both internal and external to the organisation all the times

5. What is negotiation in your world? It’s about: ♦Allocating and managing time? ♦Allocating and managing resources? ♦Travel arrangements? ♦Negotiating fees? ♦Influencing people?

6. My intention My intention today is to leave you with an experience of ‘action’ (making things happen) rather than to merely provide you with ‘new information’. What makes a real difference in conversations.

7. My new possibility Choose a few people (5) in your working world with whom you wish to create a new opening or possibility – or a breakthrough.

8. Basic Claims  We, human beings, live in language.  Language is generative – we create the world we live in with our language (when we speak we act: language = action).  We are our actions (which includes speaking and listening).

9. Consider… To engage others in conversations is to move them to action. The success or failure of any executive assistant is a direct function of her/his ability handle effective conversations (communicate). Your working world is:  A network of conversations. Effective conversations co-ordinate action.  A system in which people are bonded (committed) to each other through a network of mutual promises.

10. The importance of language  Fundamentally, as human beings, get our work done through language – that is, speaking and listening.  Today I want to explore with you talking and the impact of talking on what’s possible.  We are going to distinguish different kinds of talking and the different results from each kind of talking.

11. Descriptive Committed Talking that refers to things  Explanations/Stories (Gossip!)  Justifications  Opinions  Reports  Assessments/Criticisms  Judgments  Reasons  Complaints PAST/AFTER THE FACT JMW is a registered trademark of JMW Consultants Inc. © 2008 JMW Consultants Inc. All Rights Reserved Categories of Talking

12. Descriptive Committed Talking that refers to things  Explanations/Stories  Justifications  Opinions  Reports  Assessments/Criticisms  Judgements  Reasons  Complaints PAST/AFTER THE FACT Talking that makes things possible Talking that makes things happen Possibilities, Vision and Values Action and/or Outcome NOW & ONGOINGNOW & FUTURE SELF-DETERMINED CIRCUMSTANCE DETERMINED PROMISE REQUEST OFFER DECLARATION STAND FOR “I SAY…” Categories of Talking JMW is a registered trademark of JMW Consultants Inc. © 2008 JMW Consultants Inc. All Rights Reserved Four Committed Responses: 1.Yes – I accept 2.No – I decline 3.Decline with a Counter Offer 4.Commit to Commit  John F. Kennedy - Moon Speech  Martin Luther King - "I have a dream"  Winston Churchill Speech –“We Shall Never Surrender!  USA declaration of independence from Great Britain (In Congress, July 4, 1776 )

13. Descriptive Committed Talking that refers to things  Explanations/Stories  Justifications  Opinions  Reports  Assessments/Criticisms  Judgements  Reasons  Complaints PAST/AFTER THE FACT Talking that makes things possible Talking that makes things happen Possibilities, Vision and Values Action and/or Outcome NOW & ONGOINGNOW & FUTURE SELF-DETERMINED CIRCUMSTANCE DETERMINED PROMISE REQUEST OFFER DECLARATION STAND FOR “I SAY…” Categories of Talking and Performance JMW is a registered trademark of JMW Consultants Inc. © 2008 JMW Consultants Inc. All Rights Reserved Continuous Improvement Realm of Breakthroughs (Extraordinary Performance) Mediocrity (Business as usual)

14. Summary - Three domains of speaking POSSIBILITY ACTION DESCRIPTION FUTURE NOW PAST Stand for Declaration Vision Requests Promises Offers Explanation Opinion Assessment Interpretation JMW is a registered trademark of JMW Consultants Inc. © 2008 JMW Consultants Inc. All Rights Reserved

15. POSSIBILITY ACTION DESCRIPTION Continuous Improvement Breakthrough Performance JMW is a registered trademark of JMW Consultants Inc. © 2008 JMW Consultants Inc. All Rights Reserved Summary - Three domains of speaking

16. Request I request you do X by Y  I = committed speaker  You = committed listener  Do = new future action  X = conditions of satisfaction  Y= end time/by when

17.  Yes – I accept  No – I decline  No – decline with a counter offer  Commit to commit (commit to respond at another time) Committed Responses to a Request

18. Offer I offer you to do X by Y.

19. Declaration I declare X is possible. I declare the possibility of X. I’m committed to the possibility ……of X.  Not based on evidence  Brings a possibility into existence Talking Which Makes Something Possible:

20. Stand  We stand for the possibility of X  The possibility we are committed to is X.  We are committed to the possibility of X.  We say X is possible.

21. Criteria ♦Bold, declarative, brief ♦Makes something new possible ♦Compelling

22. My new possibility How will I create a new opening or possibility with some of the people in my working world? Make the following:  One Promise  One or two Offers  One or Requests  One Declaration or take Stand for something

23. Completion ♦What is the most valuable thing you are taking away from the work session? ♦What can you be counted on for? ♦What did you get out of the work session? ♦What would you like to say to complete the work session?

24. My Requests and Offer Sebastian Salicru JMW Consultants sebastians@jmw.com Ph: 03 - 9258 1400 Mobile: 0448 049 691

25. My Already Always Listening Conversation The sum total of my opinions, interpretations, ascribed meanings, certainties, positions, beliefs, concepts, and what I already know to be true constitute my already always listening.