1. Healthy Relationships
Objectives:
To understand components of a healthy relationship
State what is important to YOU in a relationship – values and opinions
Articulate concrete ways to improve upon negative situations and improve relationships.

2. Relationships

3. When I am with someone else I need to feel: ________________.
A relationship is a bond or connection you have with other people.

4. Evaluating a Relationship Activity
The purpose of this activity is to heighten awareness of what constitutes a good relationship and to help you learn how to evaluate your own relationships.
Use this worksheet to evaluate any type of relationship including a romantic relationship, friendship, or family relationship.
Think of a relationship, past or present, that is important to you and use this worksheet to evaluate that relationship.

5. Scoring Your Worksheet
One point for each “yes” response to questions 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 11, 12, 13 and 14.
One point for each “no” response to questions 1, 5, 7, 8 and 10.

6. What does the score mean?
1-3:
There are few constructive elements in this relationship. You may want to think about your reasons for continuing the relationship, or work toward improving it.
4-6:
This relationship has problems that might be resolved by working on honesty and communication.
7-10:
There is the basis for a good relationship. Focus on the positive elements and work on improving the destructive ones.
10-14:
You're doing well and have what it takes to build a successful and satisfying relationship.

7. Traits of a healthy relationship
Mutual respect
Caring
Honesty
Commitment

8. Three C’s of healthy relationships
Communication
Cooperation
Compromise

9. Codependent Relationships
Codependency – making the relationship more important to you than you are to yourself
Trying to make the relationship work with someone else who’s not trying
Behaviors of codependent people:
Low self esteem
Fixers
People pleasers
Fear abandonment

10. Relationships Healthful Harmful
Promotes mutual respect, productivity, and health (physical, emotional, mental and social)
Free of violence, harmful behaviors, and drug use
Harmful
Harms self respect, interferes with productivity and health (physical, emotional, mental, and social)
Includes violence and/or drug abuse, harmful behaviors

11. Harmful Relationship Profiles
People Pleaser
Seeks approval
Does anything to be liked
Acts like a “doormat”
The Enabler
Supports harmful behavior of others
Makes excuses for behavior of others
Takes over other peoples responsibilities

12. Harmful Relationship Profiles
The Clinger
Needy and dependent
Chases and clings
Suffocates others
The Fixer
Fixes other peoples problems
Quick to give advice
Takes over other peoples responsibilities

13. Harmful Relationship Profiles
The Distancer
Emotionally unavailable
Avoids sharing feelings
Keeps people at an arms length away
The Controller
Possessive, jealous, and domineering
Does not respect the will of others
Demands one way
The Center
Self centered
Talks but does not listen
Ignores the needs of others

14. Harmful Relationship Profiles
The Abuser
Abusive
Puts down others
Threatens and harms others
The Liar
Does not tell the truth
Builds relationships on lies
Manipulates others into responses they want
The Promise Breaker
Unreliable
Makes plans and cancels them
Agrees to change behavior and does not do so