1. Communication: The Basics
Upper Middle Level Health

2. Communication
We have discussed many different topics this quarter. You have learned about many topics where one day you will have to make a very important decision.
You may know what you believe and what you want, but some people don’t know how to communicate those feelings.

3. Communication The next five lessons will be on:
How to make and keep friends
How to get what you want (whether it’s a job or a hug) without using other people and without getting used by other people.
How to respect yourself and other people at the same time.
How to get along with your parents.
How to communicate your decisions.
How to stand up for yourself without standing on top of someone else.

4. Communication: The Basics
Today, we will discuss different types of communication and some consequences of those specific types of communication.

5. Communication: The Basics
Story of Logan
I will need a few volunteers to read aloud.

6. Communication: The Basics
Communication Reference Sheet

7. Aggressiveness Definition
Taking what you want, threatening, or forcing a person to give you something, or saying “no” in a way that puts the other person down or violates his or her rights.
Consequences
Often gets what you want, but the other person definitely does not appreciate it.
You win; they lose

8. Aggressiveness Example 1
You want to borrow your friend’s coat, so you take it. Or you ask, but if your friend says “no”, you call her a stingy creep.

9. Aggressiveness Consequence of Example 1
You might get to borrow the coat if you just take it, but you’ve probably lost a friend and maybe other friends, when your reputation gets out.

10. Aggressiveness Example 2
Your friend asks to borrow your coat and say “no” and shove him away from your locker.

11. Aggressiveness Consequence of Example 2
You don’t lost the coat but you may lose the friend and other friends, if they saw the argument.
You will get in trouble for being violent.

12. Passiveness Definition
Not speaking up when you’d like something or giving in and saying “yes” when you don’t really want to, in order to be liked or not hurt the other person’s feelings.
Consequence
Usually doesn’t get you what you want, and other people may get the idea that you’re an easy target or “push over”. You lose their respect.
You lose; they win.

13. Passiveness
Example
Your friend, who never returns things, asks to borrow your coat and you say “yes”, even though you know your mother’s going to yell at you if you go home without it.

14. Passiveness Consequence of Example
You lose the coat. Your mother yells at you. Your friend, who has now borrowed three things, considers you a wimp and feels like she can use you whenever she likes. You may get a reputation as an easy target.

15. Manipulation Definition
Getting what you want or turning someone down in a dishonest way, or doing something for somebody only so they’ll give you what you want.
Consequences
Sometimes gets you what you want, but other people will eventually figure it out and not like it. You lose their trust.
You may win; they lose.

16. Manipulation
Example 1
You get your friend to lend you the coat by saying you’ll give it back when you get off the bus and then conveniently “forgetting”.

17. Manipulation Consequence of Example 1
You may not lose your friend this time, but if you keep it up, eventually he’ll wise up. He won’t trust you. You may lost other friends as your reputation as a “user” gets around.

18. Manipulation
Example 2
Your friend asks to borrow your coat. You lend it to her, so that when you want to borrow money from her she’ll “have to” let you.

19. Manipulation Consequence of Example 2
Your friend will be glad for the moment. But she may be annoyed when she discovers that you think she “owes” you a favor. She may not trust you after that.

20. Assertiveness Definition
Asking straight for what you want or giving people and honest “no” to things you don’t want. It means not using other people and not letting yourself be used either.
Consequences
Often gets you what you want, though not always, but you keep your self-respect and the other person usually appreciates it.
You both may win.

21. Assertiveness Example
Your friend asks to borrow your coat, but he hasn’t returned the last two things he’s borrowed. You say “No, sorry.” Say, “I wish you’d give me back my money and my math book”.

22. Assertiveness Consequences of Example
You might get your things back. You won’t get in trouble with your father for you coat being missing. You’ve probably kept a friend, who now will know he can’t “use” you.

23. Communication: The Basics
Which form of communication is the best??
Which form do you feel is used most among you and your peers??

24. Communication: The Basics
Communication Worksheet 1
We will do the first few situations as a class, then I want you all to try it on your own.
What we/you don’t finish in class should be completed at home.