Chapter 17

 Sexual intercourse that occurs without consent Stranger rape Acquaintance rape: 3 out of 4 sexual assaults Date rape Statutory rape All perpetrators exhibit a lack of empathy for the feelings of their victims and a willingness to take advantage of them. This lack of consciousness allows for objectification and depersonalization The survivors often are left with feelings of vulnerability and fear which may interfere with her health (mind and body) and her relationships (with self and others)

*Women ages 16 to 24 are the most frequent victims of reported rape in the U.S. *Being raped before age 18 increases the chances that a woman will be raped again. Also, women who were victims of childhood sexual abuse are at increased risk for adult sexual revictimization by rapists. *20-35% of all teenage and adult women have been victims of coerced sexual activity, most commonly in dating situations. * Need for developing healthy, secure, intelligent/discerning boundaries *

 Used to terrorize, demoralize, dominate, humiliate, and control  Can disable and destroy bonds of family and society  An act of war that assaults not only the individual woman but also her family and community

 Traumatic experience with long-term repercussions  Physical violation and psychological trauma (emotional and relational effects)  Shame, anger, fear, guilt, depression, feelings of powerlessness, and associating sexual activity with the assault  40% of survivors refrained from sexual contact for 6 months -1 year  75% reported decreased sexual activity up to 6 years  Rape accounts for the highest rates of PTSD among non wartime traumatic events

 Adult engaging in sexual contact of any kind with a child  Pedophilia or incest  Because perpetrators are usually known by the victim, there is often a huge sense of betrayal and confusion  Pedophiles in cyberspace exploit unsuspecting kids in need of attention and kids with confused notions of sexuality  Educating children and using parental controls to block inappropriate sites and channels are necessary

 Strong link between sexual abuse in childhood and sexual difficulties in adulthood  Other common symptoms:  Low self-esteem  Guilt  Depression  Shame  Alienation  A lack of trust in others  Revulsion at being touched  Drug and/or alcohol abuse

 Obesity  Elevated suicide rate  Predisposition to being victimized  Medical problems  Chronic pain  Gastrointestinal disorders  Loss of childhood innocence  Contamination or interruption of normal sexual development

 Any unwanted sexual attention, in the workplace or an academic setting, that creates discomfort and/or interferes with the victim’s job or education  44%-88% of women on the job report sexual harassment. 19 % of men  20-40% of undergraduate women, % of graduate women; 9-29% undergraduate men

 Getting personal and professional support- utilize supportive relationships  Conscious reestablishment of healthy, intelligent, discerning boundaries. How to maintain healthy self-protection and have the ability for close connection in relationship.  Educate those close to you that your nervous system may be on “high alert” for danger (a natural self- protective mechanism). Gentle, conscious relationships help build a sense of safety and help to establish the ability to trust.

 Attention: engaged focus with sensitivity to needs and feeling; attunement and understanding  Acceptance: respectfully receiving all feelings, choices, and personal traits with support  Appreciation: having faith in another’s value. A feeling of gratitude that fosters closeness.  Affection: giving and receiving love. Being a loving presence.  Allowing: creating an environment where there is safety and support for being oneself, knowing and showing deepest needs and wishes.

 Attention from others leads to self- respect  Acceptance engenders a sense of being an inherently good person  Appreciation generates a sense of self- worth  Affection makes us feel lovable  Allowing gives us the freedom to pursue our deepest needs, values, and wishes.