2. DEFINITIONS MYTHS / TRUTHS STATISTICS EFFECTS HOW TO SUPPORT A FRIEND PRECAUTIONS

3. SEXUAL VIOLENCE IS…

4. SEXUAL VIOLENCE IS FORCED SEXUAL ACTIVITY WITHOUT CONSENT.

5. Force is any PHYSICAL and/or VERBAL pressure that is used to make someone comply to sex when they really don’t want to.

6. PHYSICAL Hitting Weapons Pushing Slapping Drugs Tying someone up

7. VERBAL Threats Fear tactics Intimidation tactics Peer pressure Blackmail Guilt trips

8. Consent is permission and agreement but for consent to be valid it has to meet certain criteria. Criteria are: Age Sober Choice

9. AGE: 17 yrs old. SOBER: Must be sober/lucid. CHOICE: Person must feel & believe they can say no with no negative consequences. It is a fair choice.

10. If under the influence of alcohol or drugs Under age of consent (17) Force or threat of force Relationships of authority. (Quid pro quo) Unable to understand nature of sex and/or consequences.

11. SEXUAL HARASSMENT Victim perceives action as sexually offensive and unwanted. SEXUAL ABUSE No penetration RAPE aka Sexual Assault Involves penetration

13. MYTH Most assaults occur between strangers on the street, alley or parking lot. TRUTH Majority of sexual assaults (84%) occur between people that know each other in the home of the victim or offender.

14. MYTH Males do not get assaulted TRUTH Males do get assaulted. One in six men will experience a sexual assault in his lifetime.

15. MYTH You can tell a rapist by their appearance TRUTH Sex offenders come from all backgrounds and walks of life.

16. MYTH Only young attractive women get assaulted. Truth Victims can be anyone. Victims come from all different backgrounds.

17. MYTH Women say “no” and mean “yes”. TRUTH “NO” means “NO”. The “NO” needs to be respected.

18. MYTH There are many false reports of rape. TRUTH Research found that 1% of reported rapes were found to be false.

19. MYTH Once consent is given, it can not be taken back. TRUTH Consent can be taken back at any point, even in the middle of having sex.

20. MYTH Spouses have to give sex to their partners when they want it in marriages. TRUTH Spouses have the right to say no to their partners and their partners have to stop

21. MYTH Victims are partly to blame for the assault. TRUTH NO. Victims do not provoke or cause their assaults by their dress or behavior.

22. 84% of assaults are acquaintance rapes 57% of all rapes occur on a date 38% of acquaintance rape victims are between 13 and 17 yrs old. In a survey, 27% of adolescent girls stated they had unwanted sex because of psychological pressure.

23. 1 in 3 girls will be abuse/assaulted by age 18 1 in 6 boys will be assaulted/abused by age 18

24. What Motivates an Offender? POWER & CONTROL

25. Relief Shock Fear Shame Guilt Humiliation Dirty Numbness Doubt Betrayed Small Angry Hopeless Traumatized Depressed Self blame Loneliness Damaged Violated Used Stupid Confused Powerless

26. Believe them Listen Offer resources Reassure that it was not their fault Accompany them to police or hospital Encourage medical attention

27. Revenge is never a good idea. Getting angry and upset is normal. BUT, do not seek revenge. It will hurt the victim, not help.

29. Know your boundaries Communicate boundaries to dates Confront boundary violations Have independent way home. Stick to public places Tell someone where you’re going and when you’ll be back

30. Stay alert Walk with confidence Try to keep 2-3 ft distance from people. If followed… Stay in public places (stores, sidewalks, etc) avoid going home if no one is home.

31. Pepper spray is legal. Check expiration date. Read instructions. Practice Test fire it periodically Consider taking a self defense class

32. It is NOT always the best thing to fight an attacker. Fighting back may result in further injury and/or death. Whatever the victim does to survive is the right thing for them to have done.