Breakdown of good essay!! Essentials Of Writing Breakdown of good essay!!

Steps in the Writing Process 1. Pre-writing (get ideas together, notes) 2. Shaping the essay 3. First draft (rough draft) 4. Revision (peer editing) ideas flow? 5. Edit (punctuation 6. Final Draft ** technically 5 steps

Body Paragraph(s) Paragraphs #2 and #3 Eight sentences 100+ words Should relate back to thesis The “middle part” of an essay = the meat of the hamburger Develops the points you want to make

Body Paragraph Structure Sentence 1: Topic sentence Sentence 2: Concrete detail, starts with For example, Sentence 3: Commentary Sentence 4: Commentary Sentence 5: Concrete detail, starts with In addition Sentence 6: Commentary Sentence 7: Commentary Sentence 8: Conclusion, all commentary

Concrete Details Very specific details that are the backbone of your paragraphs (reasons to support your case) Concrete details include: facts, specific examples, descriptions, quotes, proof, evidence (articles, newspapers, other sources) The reasons why!!

Commentary Your opinion about the topic being discussed Synonyms: opinion, interpretation, your own experience with the subject, reflection, how does it impact you, etc. Ask yourself…..How do I feel about this?? Further explaining your reasons!! Comment on the point you made!

Topic Sentence The very first sentence in your body paragraphs Must have the subject (whatever you’re talking about) and commentary (your feeling) Tells what your entire paragraph will be explaining Ex. I like camping more than anything

Putting It All Together Sentence #1 (TS): I hate shopping for Christmas. (it contains subject and feeling) Sentence #2 (CD): For example, the lines always have five or six people waiting for one cashier. Sentence # 3 (CM): It takes forever to pay for something  how does it affect you? Sentence # 4 (CM): By the time I’m finished, I’m exhausted from running around. how does it affect you?

Your Turn! Remember: 2 points of commentary for every concrete detail!!! Sentence #1 (TS): The walls in this classroom are dull and boring Sentence # 2 (CD): For example,________ Sentence # 3 (CM):__________ (how it makes you feel) Sentence # 4 (CM): __________ how it makes you feel)

Concluding Sentence Last sentence in the body paragraph ALL commentary Don’t repeat key words Sum it all up, give it a finished feeling

Tying it All Together Thesis: My favorite season of the year is summer Paragraph 1 TS: The biggest reason is the relaxed change in my daily routine. CD: For example, I have time to sleep in and stay up late. CM: There are not emotional or physical demands on me. CM: I can recharge my energies for awhile. CD: In addition, I can watch TV or read as long as I want. CM: I have the leisure to do things I normally wouldn’t. CM: It feels okay to do them when I have unlimited time.. CS: Not having any commitments lets me unwind

Writing Detectives!! What is wrong with the following commentary?? (TS) Camping is wonderful. For example, I like the fresh air the most. I hated the bites I got there. In addition, my family argued the whole time. How can me make this better. Let’s hear your examples!!

Great Job! This sounds much better…. Camping is wonderful. For example, I like the fresh air the most. I always feel healthier after some time in the mountains. It feels good to breathe deeply after the smog of the city. Yellow= concrete detail Orange= commentary

With A Partner…. Enhance the following commentary… Camping is the best vacation. For example, the air is clean and and clear. It sure is good being there. I like it a lot.

Introduction Paragraph The very first paragraph in an essay It includes the thesis (very end, last sentence of your intro paragraph) Writer must find a way to “hook” the reader.

Thesis Statement The very last sentence in your intro paragraph The overarching idea of your paper what is the point in this paper Most important sentence All body paragraphs should relate back to thesis Sentence with subject and opinion (commentary)

Types of Intros (Hook the reader) 1. Quotes- Must include quotation marks and cite the source (famous person) 2. Anecdote- BRIEF personal story relating to the topic 3. Fact/Statistic- 4. Definition (WEAK)- Not too long, not a common everyday word 5. Question (Can also be very weak) answered in reader’s mind 6. Startling information- use exclamation point and word that makes readers jump

DO NOT….. Start intro with “ I am going to tell you about” or “This paper is going to be about” Not too much detail Not too short Not too wordy Perfect = 40+ words See Intro PPT

Thesis Statement Last sentence in opening paragraph Contains subject and opinion EX: Australia is the best country of all for a vacation Format: Intro Paragraph Intro Hook (think of your options) = 4 sentences Thesis after your hook= 1 sentence

Lets Practice For each thesis, underline the subject and circle the opinion (commentary) Fishing is fun to do when I’m with my dad English is my favorite class It’s exciting going to a new school Tacos are my favorite food

Thesis…yes or no? 1. My high school is the best one around__ 2. I have gone to East High for 3 years__ 3. My family went to Disneyland last year__ 4. School is a cool place to be__ 5. We are required to take 4 courses this school year__ Answer: Y, N,N,Y,N…How did you do?

Conclusion/ Concluding Paragraph Last paragraph in essay Sums up ideas and reflects on what was said Say more commentary about your subject (save the best for last) ALL COMMENTARY!! Do not repeat thesis or key words (same words from paragraphs) Tie it all together RESTATE thesis in different words 4-5 sentences!! See pgs. 122-123 in yellow handout for help!!