Conflict Styles Conflict styles are the predominant ways that people deal with conflict. Most people rely on one or two styles that are often defined by emphasis on concern for the self or concern for the other. The goal of an effective conflict manager is to be able to use any conflict style when the situation demands.

Assumptions about Styles People develop styles based on past experience People have reasons for the styles they use Styles can undergo change No one style is automatically better than another

Thomas and Kilmanns styles Two key dimensions – Concern for the self (assertiveness) – Concern for the other (cooperativeness) The styles are defined by the combinations of dimensions (whether hi, moderate or low on certain dimensions) The styles are defined as pure types

Thomas and Kilmanns styles Competing Avoiding Accommodating Collaborating Compromising Concern For Self Concern for Other

Verbal Description of Styles Avoiding: low on protecting your interests and theirs. Avoidance can be either physical and/or psychological Accommodating: meeting the needs of the other person but ignoring your own needs. giving in to the desires of the other – Conceding – a firmer version in which you strategically accommodate to build relationship – Yielding – a weaker version in which you allow the other party to control the situation and define the conflict

Verbal Description of Styles Competing: generally thought of as a win- lose orientation in which you try to maximize your gains – Forcing – trying to get others to go along with you by exerting power over them – Contending – a softer form of competing in that you are somewhat flexible about your position while considering only your own goals

Verbal Description of Styles Compromising: involves a moderate protection of your needs as well as theirs. Also assumes there are fixed resources Collaborating: When you are interested in maximizing your own gains as well as the others. Problem-solving style in which the parties work together against the problem.

Selecting Conflict Styles Five key diagnostic questions – How important are the issues to you? – How important are the issues to the other? – How important is it to maintain a positive relationship? – How much time pressure is there? – To what extent does one party trust the other?

When Each Style is the Best Avoiding – When the issue is trivial to you – When there is no long-term relationship – When you are the low power party in a serious power imbalance Competing – When the other will be very competitive – When important others expect you to compete – AND when the stakes are high

When Each Style is the Best Accommodating – When the issue is trivial to you – When harmony in the relationship is all important – When you are the low power party in a serious power imbalance – When you want to build trust in the other by demonstrating a protection of their interests Compromising – When there are truly finite resources – When there are no means to increase the divisible resources

When Each Style is the Best Collaborating – When the issue is complex and requires creativity – When there is a long-term relationship – When their implementation of the decision is necessary