Working Effectively with Parents July 2013 Pre-Service By Laurie Ocampo

 Always greet parents in a positive manner. Thank them for the things they do.  Use proper grammar and dress appropriately.  Talk about things of interest to establish the relationship (even the weather).  End conversations on a positive note (“Have a nice evening.”). Keep in mind, “We are here because they are here.” Some Basic Guidelines in Working with Parents-

 Act instead of react.  Be compassionate.  Go the extra mile.  Carry yourself with dignity. Be calm and tactful.  Have a caring attitude. Do not let parents feel judged.  Recognize and work to overcome any bias or prejudice. Some Basic Guidelines in Working with Parents (cont.)-

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the problem. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the problem and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set a mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the problem. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the problem and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the difficulty. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the problem and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the difficulty. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the problem and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the difficulty. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the difficulty and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the difficulty. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the difficulty and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

The 7-Steps of Encouraging Parental Cooperation When a Child is Experiencing Difficulties 1) 1) Set the scene by being friendly, but firm. 2) Set mutually agreed-upon goal. 3) State the difficulty. Be calm, cool, and caring. 4) Listen. 5) Restate the difficulty and explore ideas for a solution. 6) Set up a plan of action. 7) Agree to meet again at a set date to evaluate.

Since the field of education can be an emotional one…there are situations where parents may become angry.

How to Handle an Angry Parent First of all— REMAIN CALM Pay attention to your body language. Pay attention to your voice. Be attentive to the parent and listen. (You may want to ask them to accompany you to a private area to talk.) Take notes. Find out what the parent really wants. If you are worried about your safety, call another staff member into the room.

GREAT ADVICE: If an incident with a student occurs, do not schedule a parent conference on the same day. Give yourself time to collect all the facts, and give the student/parent (and yourself) time to calm down and think things through.

If a parent insists on seeing you and there is no way to reschedule for a later time/date, use the S.T.A.L. Technique…

The S.T.A.L. Technique S Stop & Listen T Think A Assertively speak- don’t feel forced into providing an immediate response. (…even if it is only to say, “I am sure that you understand that I will need time to look into the situation. I will contact you as soon as I have collected the information I need and then we can meet and discuss this.”) L Listen

When discussing an student incident, you should…  State exactly what the student did. “Richard hit two students this morning in the classroom.” Don’t use qualifiers.  Make a concern statement about the child. “I am worried about this because I don’t want to see Richard be without friends.” Make sure your concern is centered on the child.  State another fact about the child’s behavior that communicates that you know he/she can do better. “I know that Richard can behave better than this because he has done so in the past.” Show you have confidence in the child changing their behavior.  Solicit the parent’s support. “How can we work together to help Richard not hit other students in the future?” Show a willingness to work with the parent to help the child improve.

Also… Keep clear, dated documentation. When you meet with the parent, have your documentation ready. Don’t forget to document phone calls, as well.

If a parent is not satisfied after your meeting with them, the parent may choose to talk with your supervisor… Make it a priority to contact your supervisor about the parent and their concerns so that your supervisor will be prepared to effectively communicate with him/her. Be prepared for some parents who may choose to go directly to your supervisor. Unfortunately, you do not have control over this, but if you notice problems early on, it might be a good idea to let your supervisor know about it.

Preparing for an Effective Parent-Teacher Conference

Checklist for Conference Preparation  Be poised, confident & positive.  Strive to be a team with the parent.  Make sure to know the parent’s name and address them in a friendly manner.  If there are difficulties that you need to address, choose only one or two of the most important concerns— do not overwhelm them.

 If you are going to discuss misbehavior, make sure that it is documented (date, time, incident).  If you are going to discuss academic issues, make sure to have student work available for the parent to view.  Use active listening skills.  Never bring up other students/staff members/parents in a Parent/Teacher conference.  If asked, offer suggestions, not solutions.  Encourage the parent to ask questions.  Always end on a positive note.

Three Ways to Eliminate Mistakes During Parent Conferences Gather all of the information you will need. Make sure that you do not have to second guess anything. Be sure that you are right. Put yourself in the parent’s shoes. Think about the parent’s perspective. Create an agenda and stick to it. This will help ensure that time is not wasted and you stick to the topics at hand.

And, finally…. Follow up with the parent as needed (phone calls, s, etc.). This shows that you care about their child’s success. This also encourages the parent to want to support your efforts in trying to help their student be successful.

Questions or Comments?