Teasing, Bullying & Gossiping Presenters Ralph Whalen, Students & Parents April 15, 2010

Schedule Teasing: Two types Parent Q: Good T examples? Classroom: Videos on T Classroom Bullying & Video Books Gossiping & Bullying What we do at TAS when kids TBS. (Mr. Rabon) What can you do at home to help with TBG. Kids’ Skits (9:00) What to do when have a problem with TBG. General Q’s Future: Seminars & Book groups Evaluation

Teasing (a friend) Cheyenne & Rachel Teasing (Not a friend) Asher & Christine Bullying Maggie, Michelle, Anna, Ella & Anya Gossiping Jacqueline, Patricia & Charlotte Student Skits

Teasing- Two Types TeaserPerson teased Good/Fun Bad

Good Teasing Expression of affection Form of play Teaches laugh at self Teaches non literal communication

Round Table Discussion Introduce yourself to everyone at the table. What examples of good teasing can you give?

Bad Teasing Ask: Why is this person teasing me? If a friend: Ask to stop. Not a friend: Ignore/Walk away. Don’t tease back. Verbally skillful?

Why are these two teasing Frankie Flowers? 2:05 & 3:20

Why is this boy teasing his sister? 4:15 & 6:03

Bullying Different than teasing Different types Solution: Power on your side 80% Solution “STOP THAT, I DON’T LIKE IT”

80% Solution: Power in Numbers 7:00 & 8:25

Gossiping Why? Power, Fun. Gossiping hurts everyone. If gossiped to… If gossiped about…

Mr. Peabody’s Apples

Partner Discussion What has worked for you as you deal with TBG?

Positive role models Create caring environment Establish limits & explain acceptable behavior Monitor student behavior Guidance Units Gr. 3: TBG Gr. 4: Conflict Resolution Gr. 5: Leadership & Friendship Preventing TBG At TAS

When TBG happens at TAS Take it seriously Encourage students to solve problems if they can. Have students talk to a school adult. Complete a Values Learning Plan.

Model, Model, Model Teach Good T Monitor home TBG Teach assertiveness Communicate Preparing For TBG: Parent Role

What is the father doing correctly? What could he do differently? Bullying Video

When Your Child Reports TBG Listen Help problem solve. Brainstorm support. Have faith in your child. Check back.

Should Parents Call the Other Child’s Parents? NO! Why not?

What if the Problem Persists? Talk to the classroom teacher. Talk to the counselor. Talk to the principal.

What Child Sees TBG? Responsibility VS Safety If danger is involved, get an adult. They can Listen Discourage Revenge Use TAS Values Befriend

What If Your Child TBG? Listen Give appropriate attention & power Ask for help Community Center

Handouts Evaluations Next Year Final Steps Thank You

Most bullying is just kids being kids. Kids don’t do these sorts of thing intentionally. FALSE Most kids don’t bully intentionally, but 5% do.

The majority of bullying involves acts of physical aggression TRUE It could however be verbal or social manipulation

Adults are generally unaware of the extent of bullying among children. TRUE It usually happens in unsupervised areas and often very quickly % who are often bullied don’t tell.

Children who bully others often believe the other child antagonized them and therefore caused the problem. TRUE Bullies may suffer physical punishment. Bullies may have negative or indifferent parenting. Bullies may have a learning disability. Some bullies don’t read social situations correctly.

Children who are bullied are usually more sensitive than their peers. TRUE They may react more to a bully.

Boys and girls are involved in bullying at about the same rate. TRUE Boys are more direct open physical or verbal Girls are more indirect gossiping social isolation manipulating friendships popular girls often bullies

Bullying: What Kids Should Do Can’t ignore it because it will get worse. Loud assertive voice, “Stop that, I don’t like it.” Get more power on your side. Get a friend to help. Get an adult to help.

Kids are powerless to stop bullying among peers. FALSE The 80% solution 5% are the bullies 15 % are bullied The 80% can help the 15% by stopping the 5%.

Gossiping: What Kids Should Do Tell the person to stop. That you don’t want to hear gossip. Ask, “How do you know that’s true?” Ask, “How can we help?”

Adults can play only a limited role in preventing bullying. It is up to the children to change. FALSE Adults can create a positive atmosphere. Adults can supervise effectively. Adults can intervene and stop bullying.

Realize ages 8-12 is the prime time of gossip Realize kids are trying to fit in Teach empathy Preparing For Gossiping: Parent Role

Model Social Skills Monitor Home Bullying Monitor Electronics Model Anger Expression Connect Your Child Preparing For Bullying: Parent Role