Chapters 5 & 6

Strategies for revising sentences: ◦ Use parallelism. ◦ Use a consistent point of view. ◦ Use specific words. ◦ Use active verbs. ◦ Use concise words. ◦ Use varied sentences.

balancing By balancing the items in a sentence, you will make the sentence clearer and easier to read. Example: My job includes checking inventory, calling initialing orders, and to call the suppliers.

Verbs Do not shift verb tenses unnecessarily. Example: Jean punched down the risen dough.dumped Then she dumps it onto the worktable.

Pronouns point of view Do not shift point of view unnecessarily. Example: I One of the fringe benefits of my job is that you I can use a company credit card for gasoline.

specificgeneral To be an effective writer, you must use specific words rather than general words.  General: The dog ran down the street.  Specific: The mangy stray loped down Broadway, dodging cars and startled pedestrians.

1: Use exact names. (Not “ the boy, ” but “ Vince. ” ) 2: Use lively verbs. (Not “ ate, ” but “ slurped. ” ) 3: Use descriptive words. (Not “ the car, ” but “ the rickety old Buick. ” ) 4: Use sense descriptions. ( “ Vince slurped his ice-cold chocolate milkshake while sitting on the squeaking front seat of his rickety old Buick. ” )

Prefer the active voice. When the subject receives the action, the verb is in the passive voice. was bought The netbook was bought by Hakim. When the subject of a sentence performs the action of the verb, the verb is in the active voice. bought Hakim bought the netbook.

Prefer concision. Wordiness -- using more words than necessary is often a sign of lazy or careless writing. Too Wordy: In this paper, I am planning to describe the hobby that I enjoy of collecting old comic books. Revision: I enjoy collecting old comic books.

Effective writing is writing that is varied and interesting.. Vary your sentences by: 1: Adding a second complete thought. 2: Adding a dependent thought. 3: Beginning with an opening word or phrase. 4: Placing adjectives or verbs in a series.

Transform simple sentences (which can be monotonous) -- Greg worked on the engine. The car still wouldn ’ t start. into compound sentences : Greg worked on the engine, but the car still wouldn ’ t start.

Transform simple sentences (which can be monotonous) – The library was very quiet. I couldn ’ t concentrate. into complex sentences : Although the library was very quiet, I couldn ’ t concentrate.

...transforms simple sentences (which can be monotonous) -- Paul was concerned about his daughter ’ s fever. Paul called a doctor. into varied sentences : Concerned about his daughter ’ s fever, Paul called a doctor.

...transforms simple sentences (which can be monotonous) – The truck bounced off a guardrail. It sideswiped a tree. It plunged into the ditch. into varied sentences : The truck bounced off a guardrail, sideswiped a tree, and plunged into the ditch.

After revising, check for mistakes in grammar, punctuation, mechanics, usage, and spelling. Edit according to the conventions of written English, aka sentence skills.

Check the edited draft of your paper for typos and other careless errors.

1) UNITY Advance a single point and stick to it.

2) SUPPORT Support your point with specific evidence.

3) COHERENCE Organize and connect the specific evidence.

4) SENTENCE SKILLS Write clear, error-free sentences.