Habit 4 – Think “Win- Win” The Principles of Interpersonal Leadership

Public Victory® Public Victory

Habit 4 Habit 4 Think Win-Win® Think Win-Win®

Think Win-Win Habit One – The Habit of Choice…Personal Responsibility Habit two – The Habit of Knowing What our Choices are…Mission Habit Three – The Habit of Action Habit Four – The Habit of an Attitude

Habit 4: See-Do-Get See Do Get I get better results by cooperating rather than competing. Get Do See I have more trusting relationships. I persist in looking for win-win outcomes.

The Emotional Bank Account A metaphor for the amount of trust that exists in a relationship Every interaction with another human being may be classified as a deposit or withdrawal Deposits build and repair trust in relationships Withdrawals lessen trust in relationships

“You can’t talk your way out of problems you behaved your way into” Deposits Withdrawals Kindness and Courtesy Keeping Promises Honoring Expectations Loyalty to the Absent Making Apologies Unkindness and Discourtesy Breaking Promises Violating Expectations Disloyalty, Duplicity Pride, Conceit, Arrogance “You can’t talk your way out of problems you behaved your way into” -Stephen R. Covey

Six Paradigms Win-Lose Lose-Win Lose-Lose Win Win-Win Win-Win or No Deal

Win-Lose Concerned with themselves first and last Achieve success at the expense of exclusion of another’s success Driven by comparison, competition, position, and power Characteristics: Is very common scripting for most people Is the authoritarian approach Uses position, power, credentials, possessions, or personality to get the “win”

Lose-Win Show high consideration for others Lack the courage to express and act on their feelings and beliefs Easily intimidated – borrow strength from acceptance and popularity Characteristics: Voices no standards, no demands, no expectations of anyone else Is quick to please or appease Buries a lot of feelings

Lose-Lose Low on courage and consideration Envy and criticize others Put themselves and others down Characteristics: Is the mind set of a highly dependant person Is the same as a “no win” because nobody benefits Is a long-term result of win-lose, lose-win, or win

Win Think of only getting what they want Don’t necessarily want other to lose, but are personally set on winning Think independently in interdependent situations without sensitivity or awareness of others Characteristics: Is self-centered Thinks “me first” Doesn’t really care if the other person wins or loses Has a Scarcity Mentality

Win-Win People who chose to win and make sure others win Take time to search for solutions that will make them happy and simultaneously satisfy others Characteristics Seeks mutual benefit Is cooperative, not competitive Listens more, stays in communication longer, and communicates with more courage

A Win-Win Person Possesses Three Character Traits Integrity: true to their feelings, values, commitments Maturity: express ideas and feelings with courage and with consideration for the ideas and feelings of others Abundance Mentality: people with an abundance mentality believe that there is plenty for everyone

Win-Win Relationships Demonstrate consistent actions that convince people that they have a well earned reputation for honesty, integrity, loyalty Their actions are consistent with their behavior, decisions, and position Believe in the best of other people Disclose-help others understand their position, behavior, and decisions Communicate Clear Expectations Seek others ideas and listen with empathy Are accurate, timely, and honest in communication Treat people with respect and respond to others needs Focus on the positive, but provide constructive feedback on improvement

Which of the Six is Best? It Depends