The Total You!

 The ability to accomplish one’s personal goals in a manner that maintains a relationship on terms that are acceptable to all parties.

 Why is feedback important?  Negative and Positive

 Let people know that you like to receive feedback  Identify the areas in which you want feedback  If you are a manager, set aside time for regularly scheduled feedback sessions  Use silence to encourage feedback  Watch for nonverbal responses  Ask questions  Paraph r ase  Use statements that encourage feedback  Reward feedback  Follow up  Recognize that feedback involves sharing ideas, not giving advice.  Include only 2-3 suggestions at a time  Know that effective feedback is immediate and well timed.

How often do you practice the actions necessary to be an effective communicator? The following is a list of 10 strategies that effective communicators practice regularly. Probably no one does all these things all the time; How frequently do you? 4: I almost always do this. 3: I often do this. 2: I do this infrequently. 1: I hardly ever do this.

1. Before I speak, I try to create a clear picture in my own mind of the mental image I want the receiver to have. 2. As a sender, I carefully consider how any biases I may have about the receiver are likely to affect the tone of my message. 3. I am aware of my word choice, speech pattern, and pronunciation peculiarities. 4. I avoid jargon that might not be understood, red flag words that might elicit negative reactions, profanity that might offend, and slang.

5. I recognize that my nonverbal behavior affects receivers. 6. I choose a particular communication channel to maximize understanding by the receiver, not for my personal comfort. 7. I adapt my messages to the knowledge, language, feelings, and motivation of my receiver. 8. I listen intently as I speak. 9. I look at and listen to my receiver for verification that I have been understood. 10. Before I speak, I ask myself, “Is this the right place to say what I’m going to say?”

Communication Styles

 Rarely seek feedback; rarely disclose  Motivated by anxiety  Prefer things to people  Seldom communicate expectations  Seen as non-communicators  Avoid or ignore conflict  Don’t try to motivate others

 Seldom seek feedback; disclose often  Motivated by overconfidence  Willingly give advice & some expectations  Seen as authoritarian  Solve conflicts by making all decisions  Motivate others mainly by criticism

 Seldom disclose; seek feedback often  Motivated by mistrust/desire for acceptance  Disclose mainly positive expectations  Seen as “yes” people  Prefer a social working environment  Smooth over conflicts  Motivate others mainly by praise

 Seek feedback often; disclose often  Motivated by confidence/like of people  Disclose both positive and negative  Over disclosure at times  Seen as team communicators  Handle conflict by participation of others  Motivate by praise and criticism

 After discussing the following topics, you will then be reinforced through eye-opening verbal and written exercises, group discussions, and a question and answer period.

Percentage of Time the Average Worker Spends on Various Communication Activities

1.I have a hard time remembering someone’s name when introduced 2.It is often difficult for me to concentrate on what others are saying 3.I fell tense when listening to new ideas 4.I have difficulty concentrating on instructions others give me 5.I dislike being a listener as a member of an audience

6. I seldom seek out the opportunity to listen to new ideas 7. I find myself daydreaming when others seem to ramble on. 8. I often argue mentally or aloud with what someone is saying before he or she even finishes speaking. 9. I find that others are always repeating things to me. 10. I seem to find out about important events too late.

 How does your current organization or school do at internal listening?  What feedback opportunities exist in your current organization or school?  Do you feel that those opportunities are adequate?  What recommendations would you make to improve the process?

To Help Ourselves On the Job Get a Degree Less Wasting Time To Help Others Advising Judging Analyzing Questioning Supporting Prompting Paraphrasing

 Hearing  Attending  Understanding  Responding  Remembering

Listening for pleasure or enjoyment.

Listening to provide emotional support for the speaker.

Listening to understand the message of a speaker.

Listening to evaluate a message for purposes of accepting or rejecting it.

 Message Overload  Internal Noise – Daydreams  External Noise (Tolerating/Creating Distractions)  Rapid Thought  Too Much Effort  Hearing Problems  Faulty Assumptions  Lack of Apparent Advantages  We all Interpret Differently  Memory Failure

 Pseudolistener  Stage-Hog  Selective Listener  Insulated Listener  Defensive Listener  Ambusher  Insensitive Listener

 Talk Less!  Take Listening Seriously  Resist or Get Rid of Distractions  Suspend Judgment  Look for Key Ideas

Ways to Become a Better Listener  Offer Verbal and Nonverbal Feedback  Plan Ahead to Prepare Yourself Mentally  Make Time to Listen  Improve Your Memory

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“Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it’s amazing what they can accomplish.” ~Sam Walton

 Listening to employees builds stronger relationships with them. Reduces Turnover.  Listening to employees can lead their growth as workers and increases their feelings of confidence about their place within the organization.  Listening to employees can help them work through issues affecting their performances.

Listening To The Boss Listen to know the boss Use knowledge of boss as guide Develop expertise valued by boss Hesitate to give advice Praise appropriately Don’t criticize

 First You Forget Names – Then You Forget Faces – Next You Forget to Pull Your Zipper Up – And Finally You Forget To Pull it Down!  George Burns

Thanks for LISTENING UP!