Part VIII Chapter 44

Discussion of feelings of satisfaction gay couples have with each other Contrasts the commitment and expectations that compare/contrast homosexual & heterosexual relationships Describes how some couples maintain commitment in the face of sexual non- exclusivity by being discreet, while others stay together for opposite reason: a searing commitment to honesty Part 8: Ch. 44

Sexual exclusivity is one of the most researched areas in studies of gay male couples – one of five most prominent themes In a gay couple, it’s one of major issues partners grapple with Kurdek (1991) reported that sexual non- exclusivity is ranked 3 rd closely behind “partner’s non-responsiveness & “partner’s personal problems” Research suggests that majority of gay male partnerships are sexually non-exclusive Part 8: Ch. 44

Most researchers define it in terms of behavior of partners A partnership exclusive of both partners don’t have sexual encounters with others Some researchers define it in terms of expectation where sexual exclusivity is acknowledged by both partners (Hickson, 1991) Author supports Hickson’s argument that a partnership can be exceptionally exclusive but behaviorally non-exclusive Part 8: Ch. 44

Unlike heterosexual couples who share a general cultural ideal of sexual exclusivity & disapproval of non-exclusivity, gay male couples don’t have such a cultural assumption Thus they have to resort to actively negotiating the arrangement of their partnership Most might use a trial-and-error approach to construct relationship rules due to lack of structural & cultural guidelines Part 8: Ch. 44

Semi-structured interviews with 30 gay male Christian couples in Britain (N = 30) Ages 20s to 70s, mean duration of partnerships 12 years & 3 months Recruited primarily through personal contacts & three national gay Christian organizations Lesbian & Gay Christian Movement (LGCM) QUEST (lesbian & gay Catholics organization) Anglican Clergy Consultation (ACC) Fieldwork was carried out between June & September 1993 Part 8: Ch. 44

Typology takes into consideration both expectation & behavior throughout duration of partnerships Category A : Expect partnership to be sexually exclusive & are behaviorally (n = 9) Category B : Expect partnership to be sexually exclusive but behaviorally non-exclusive (n =8) Category C : Expect partnership to be sexually non-exclusive & are behaviorally (n = 13) Category D : Expect partnership to be sexually non-exclusive but are behaviorally exclusive (n = 0) Part 8: Ch. 44

Typology reveals contradictory scenario to Blasband &Peplau’s (1985) argument that this is consistency between partners’ agreements about sexual exclusivity & their actual behavior Part 8: Ch. 44

Research suggests that gay male couples tend to demonstrate trend towards sexual non-exclusivity over time (McWhirter & Mattison, 1984; Davies et al., 1993; Harry & DeVall, 1978) Findings of current study don’t confirm this Six partnerships longer than 5 years Longest: 27 years Shortest: 1 year Mean: 9 years & 5 months Part 8: Ch. 44

Reasons for sexual exclusivity : (1) Sexual exclusivity considered symbol of total commitment (2) Sexual exclusivity perceived as symbol of complete mutual satisfaction (3) For some, explicit attribution of their belief in sexual exclusivity to conventional Christian sexual ethics for intimate relationships Part 8: Ch. 44

Couples began partnerships with expectation of exclusivity, but either one or both partners violated expectation at certain point during partnership Non-exclusivity became feature of these couples within six months to two years Reasons for sexual non-exclusivity : (1) Natural progression (2) Dissatisfaction with aspects of partnership (3) Desire for sexual experimentation Part 8: Ch. 44

Four mechanisms developed to manage their non-exclusive lifestyles: (1) Establishment of explicit ground rules (2) Concealment of information outside sexual encounters (3) Disclosure of information about outside sexual encounters (4) Prevention of casual sexual encounters from developing into ongoing affairs Part 8: Ch. 44

Partnerships began with expectation of non- exclusivity, behaviorally as well Three reasons cited : (1) Search for sexual variety & excitement as main reason (2) Related to absence of normative guidelines for same-sex partnerships (3) Egalitarianism – prevent interpartner possessiveness Part 8: Ch. 44

Stems from perception of lack of recognition from institutionalized Church & its silence on sexual ethics for gay Christian partnerships Results in distancing of many respondents from the Church & its official stance on homosexuality Part 8: Ch. 44

Research evidence suggests there’s no significant difference between sexually exclusive & non-exclusive couples in terms of relationship satisfaction, adjustment & commitment (Peplau, 1981; Blumstein & Schwartz, 1983; Blesband & Peplau, 1985; Kurdek & Schmitt, 1986; and Kudek, 1988) Part 8: Ch. 44

What distinguishes homosexual couples and heterosexual ones in the context of sexual exclusivity? Part 8: Ch. 44

Part VIII Chapter 45

Focuses on the mechanisms employed by pimps to lure women into prostitution, and eventually, into obligatory relationships that support his flashy lifestyle Pimp – one who controls actions & lives off proceeds or one or more women who work the streets. They call themselves: “Players” – pimps “The game” – their profession “The life” – context of subculture Part 8: Ch. 45

In the 1960s & 1970s, social scientists devoted much time & research on exposing & understanding pimp-controlled prostitution within street-level prostitution, which entails sexual acts for money or barter that occurs on & off streets & include sexual activities: In cars & motels As dancers in gentlemen’s clubs Massage parlors work Truck stops Crack house work Part 8: Ch. 45

Examines pimp-related violence toward women involved in street-level prostitution within context of pimp-controlled prostitution Data obtained from larger study including both independent & pimp-controlled women Snowball, purposive sampling (n = 21) Six had pimps Criteria for inclusion 18 years or older (18 to 28 years) No longer prostituting (Avg. 4 to 8 years) Part 8: Ch. 45

Pimps, players and macks are those at top of pimping game To these men in power, it’s a game where they control & manipulate actions of subordinate others Pimping game requires strict adherence to rules To “have” game implies that pimps have certain amount of charisma & smooth- talking, persuasive conversation toward women Part 8: Ch. 45

Paramount rule – the pimp must get paid Another rule – game is “sold and not told” Pimps expected to sell prostitution to women without revealing his entire game plan This is done via persuasive conversations Final rule – pimp must have woman or women that want to see him on top Macks : most well-respected pimps Players : average stable of women, well- respected & make good living Tennis shoe pimps : one or two prostitutes on street Part 8: Ch. 45

For a pimp, gaining a woman’s attention means looking good, smelling nice, flashing possessions & presenting himself as someone who can counter boredom with adventure & excitement Must also be skilled at assessing a woman’s needs & vulnerabilities Exploiting these vulnerabilities & fulfilling unmet needs enable him to prostitute her For some, a pimp offers hope for future & opportunity to be financially successful Part 8: Ch. 45

Women in this study who were involved with a pimp typically didn’t engage in drug abuse Pimps realize crack is competition & frown upon any drug use from their stable Two women involved with tennis show pimps indulged in drug use along with their pimp Pimp-controlled women were told they were beautiful & that men wanted them Pimps didn’t guarantee emotional & financial security, but potential for these things inspired women Part 8: Ch. 45

Thoroughbreds : women who learn the game & become proficient in playing They are professionals in prostitution & responsible for maintaining market rates Able to handle customers, command money & conduct business effectively to maximize profits Part 8: Ch. 45

Pimps keen on marketing product & investing in it in order for maximum profits Thus courting or “honeymoon” period between pimps & prostitutes A time when pimp “runs his game” Can last one day to several months Women can be enticed away from another pimp – viewed as component of free enterprise This can be done without retaliation from another pimp Part 8: Ch. 45

Each woman in study had a pimp who set rules, controlled her actions & took her earnings Most reported being infatuated with their pimp The more corporate the pimp, the less likely women described feelings as love or defining interaction as a relationship With tennis shoe pimps, for example, women more likely to describe interactions as relationship Part 8: Ch. 45

Wife-in-law : prostituted women in a pimp’s family that work for his benefit May be responsible for ongoing training of recent inductees Some women didn’t tolerate this & moved on Others welcomed the prestige of being with a successful pimp & willingly took on challenge & responsibilities as a prostituted woman under his direction Bottom bitch : number one lady in pimp family who might be required to work but only use her hands and/or mouth, saving intercourse for pimp Part 8: Ch. 45

True talents of a pimp Keeping his women happy Commanding money Portray deep, mysterious & somewhat mean demeanor about him Conveys message that he is not to be crossed, which gives him title of being “cold-blooded” or “icy” Pimp’s approach is never to cow down to his woman at any time Can’t let love cloud his judgment concerning business Part 8: Ch. 45

Extent to which women felt threatened by pimp in part function of her evaluation of likelihood of pimp’s violence This threat realized by all women in study Pimp violence unpredictable & took many forms Most revealing – immediate attack Leaving “ho stroll” or designated work area early without making daily quota one violation resulting in violence Part 8: Ch. 45

Pimp’s success dependent on arousing love & fear in women Relationships require level of trust & degree of vulnerability Part 8: Ch. 45

Many factors prevent women from pursuing legal assistance Often fear, intimidation Love for pimp despite abuses Buying into pimping game & blame herself for violating Reluctance to report due to prior experience of inaction on part of law enforcement when it came to “customer” complaints Women who do leave are escaping Part 8: Ch. 45

Why do women remain with pimps that, most often times, treat them harshly? What is the appeal? To what extent does pimping resemble any other capitalist, free enterprise? Part 8: Ch. 45