1. Friendship and Support

2. Overview of Friendship Nature of Friendship Rules of Friendship Theories of Friendship Balance Theory Developmental Theory Theories that describe how relationships change over time e.g. Social Penetration Theory, Reinforcement Theories (Exchange and Equity) Forming and Maintaining Friendships Friendship Across the Life-Cycle

3. Nature of Friendship A friend is someone: With whom we are intimate Whom we trust On whom we can depend Who shares Who is accepting Who is caring With whom we are close Whom we enjoy (Sapadin, 1988) Answers from 156 professionals in Boston, New York, and Los Angelos

4. Rules of Friendship Rules of Relationships- Shared beliefs among members of a culture about what behaviors friends should or should not perform. Develop during childhood into adulthood Volunteer help in time of need Respect privacy Keep confidences Trust and confide in each other Stand up for them in their absence Don’t criticize each other in public Show emotional support Look them in the eye during conversation Strive to make him or her happy Don’t be jealous of other relationships Argyle and Henderson, (1985)

5. Social Penetration Theory Premise: the development of a relationship is closely tied to systematic changes in communication, specifically self-disclosure Self-Disclosure: the process of revealing personal information to someone else Two Important Aspects of Communication Breadth: refers to the variety of topics discussed Depth: refers to the personal significance of topics

8. Social Penetration Theory II Reciprocity: a process in communication in which a person matches the other person’s level of disclosure Responsiveness- the extend of understanding, caring, support, and respect demonstrated by the target of disclosures Breadth increases more rapidly than depth Reciprocity is usually matched in initial relationship formation but later responsiveness is more important than reciprocity Taboo Topics- sensitive matters that, in the opinion of the partners, may threaten the quality of their relationship

9. Self Disclosure and Satisfaction Linear Relationship Curvilinear Relationship Too much self-disclosure in the beginning is predictive of greater dislike by 6 months

10. Gender Differences: Same-Sex Friendships Male friendships revolve around common activities Female friendships are usually characterized by emotional sharing Men and women generally talk about different topics Females disclose more to females than males disclose to males Females are more likely to express feelings of love and affection Women’s same-sex friendships tend to be closer than men’s When it is considered socially appropriate men disclose more than women do Women’s friendships involve more social support

11. Forming & Maintaining Relationships Environmental Factors (proximity) Individual Factors (approachability, social skills Dyadic Factors (self-disclosure, similarity, closeness & intimacy,) Situational Factors (marriage, geography) Social Network- an individuals array of close associates including friends and kin relations May facilitate or impede friendship development  Network Overlap (% of network members shared)  Boundary Density (cross links between members)  Cross Network Contact (communication between each friend and the other friend’s social network

12. Johari Window Openness

13. Gender and Friendship Women’s and Men’s Friendships What are the characteristics of each? Cross-Sex Friendships Difficulty with romantic and sexual feelings 48% Ended due to romantic feelings toward friend or another person 50% of college sample reported engaging in sex with a cross-sex friend and maintaining the friend relationship

14. Social Support General Definition Specific Definition Social Support Emotional Cognitive Behavioral ( Wortman and Dunkel-Schetter (1987) and Goldsmith (1998)) Perceived Support Predictor of Positive Outcomes

15. Social Support Social Support from Family and Friends Characteristics Gender Friend vs Family Social Support in Couples Characteristics Gender Extraversion Negative Emotionality Spouse Support has a positive correlation with marital satisfaction